Atheist Camel

Ask the Hump: "So what’s up with this Xtian love for Israel?"

2012-02-11T19:43:00.009-05:00

Jim from Washington state asks on facebook:

“Hump- something has bothered me for a while, so of course, I turn to you. What's the damn deal with fundamentalists, especially those who are end-times prophecy-afflicted with their adoration of Israel?

Has it something to do with the book of Revelation? Something about all Jews being returned to Israel? Something to do with all Jews being converted to Xtianity? Isn't there a hint of anti-Semitism in some of this?

Any light you can shed will be greatly appreciated.”

Jim, fasten your seat belt. This is going to be a scary ride.

The fundies interpret Ezekiel and the book of Daniel to mean that the third rebuilding of the original Temple in Jerusalem is necessary before the End Times, the Apocalypse, the 2nd coming of Jesus can occur. This is why they want the Jews to build, why they support Israel so fanatically and why they say that anyone who proposes bringing peace to the Middle East is the Antichrist.

They are called “Christian Zionists.” This is a relatively new phenomenon with the Xtian right, only coming to the forefront of American politics since the 1980’s. Pat Robinson, Jerry Falwell(d.), John Hagee, many GOP congressmen and senators, Sean Hannity, “The Family” on Washington’s K Street, among many "civilian" fundie Xtians are Christian Zionists.

Don't misinterpret their support for Israel to be the elimination of the traditional Xtian rabid anti-Semitism - it's all about the prophecy of the rebuilding. They still hate “Christ Killer” Jews as much as they always have they just aren’t as open about their disdain as they used to be when they blocked them from medical schools, and “restricted” them from their country clubs, and burned crosses on their lawns.

But here’s the rub: the ruins of the old temple, destroyed by the Romans in 70 AD during the suppression of the Jewish Revolt, has one of Islam's most holy sites on top of it -the Dome of the Rock- where Muhammad is believed to have beamed up to heaven hand in hand with archangel Gabriel. It’s been there since 691 AD.

So for Israel to rebuild the temple would require the destruction of the Muslim shrine provoking the worst religious war the planet has ever known, pitting all 2.2 billion Muslims on earth against Israel’s 5.7 million Jews (what is that, like 400 to 1?); potentially inciting a nuclear exchange. There’s the Apocalypse, and that’s the end game.

The Christian Zionists wouldn’t shed a tear if 90% of the population of Israel (not to mention a few million Muslims and X number of Christian bystanders) where to be exterminated as long as the temple is rebuilt. One has to be in awe of how these people can reconcile this utter madness with their religion’s founder’s supposed “Prince of Peace” persona.

How does Israel perceive all this? Israel is nothing if not pragmatic. They will take fanatical support for their nation from whomever will give it. It's a matter of survival in a region that considers them illegitimate, and a world that has historically abandoned the Jews. They have no intention of helping bring about their own destruction by fulfilling this crazy Xtian concept of prophecy.

Israel has no illusions as to what the true feelings of the Xtian fundamentalists are toward the Jewish people. But they will play along, welcome their unswerving support in Washington, and play host to Xtian congressmen and their insanity to ensure Xtian lobbying for Israel is not weakened and a 2nd Holocaust at the hands of their Muslim neighbors is not realized. It comes down to a matter of survival.

Religion infects everything: the mind, the body, the health of the planet and potentially it's very existence.

Hump’s Advice to the Non-Religiously Afflicted: Responding to “God’s Plan”

2012-02-06T15:09:00.007-05:00

From time to time I am asked for my opinion by freethinkers on how to handle debate questions or deal with personal issues related to religion. The following was posed to me by a Facebook friend who finds herself under siege by platitude spouting God Virus infected Bible belt denizens.Kelly from Tennessee writes:

“Dear Hump,
99.9999% of my fb friends are xtians. What is the best response to people who claim ‘I must trust in God no matter how much I suffer, he has a plan for my life.’
Thanks,

Kelly”

Dear Kelly,

Naturally there are a number of responses, but I assume you want to keep these religious nutters as your fb friends, so that narrows the options. The simplest and most direct reply is this:

"Trusting in an imaginary friend is something thinking people gave up once they outgrew toddlerhood. If one finds comfort in believing their life is guided by the imaginary friend they have opted to retain in adulthood, that's fine for them. Suffering, sadness, death, happiness, success, failure, comfort...they are part of the facts of life, part and parcel to man's existence - no spirit thing is involved, nor need be invoked.”

“I prefer to take control of my life; do my own planning, set my goals and objectives, and work toward them with education, self reliance, and with eyes opened to the reality of the world...the only reality and the only world there is. It works for me, thank you."

See how that goes over. If they are unable to comprehend this, which many won't; or if that doesn't end the proselytizing, and it probably won't, may I suggest as a last resort my alternate approach to wit: "Well go screw yourself and the man-god you rode in on."

Hope that helped.

This Xtian need for their lives to have a plan managed for them by their god thing must be very comforting. It absolves them of any responsibility for their lot in life, and sets a low expectation for the effort they put into controlling their own destiny.

If their child dies from an untreated disease; if an infant is born with an alcohol induced birth defect; if their double wide is destroyed in a hurricane; if they lose their job; if they get kicked off of public assistance; if they roll their pickup and break their neck; if their club foot isn’t cured by the faith healer; if they drop their long neck beer bottle during a bar fight; if the road kill they scrapped off the interstate for dinner has mange rendering it unfit to serve to the visiting Pastor - somehow, some way, it's all part of a complex plan that their Sky Buddy has laid out for them.

Of course, when Cousin Mary Ellen came out of the closet and declared her full blown lesbianism, that wasn't part of God’s plan at all, nuh uh! That was Satan at work.

It's not for them to understand God’s plan, it never is. After all, who but their omniscient God could conceive of the plan behind why Aunt Mildred couldn't find her way out of her darkened house crammed with 60 years of accumulated bibles, paper church fans, pictures of Jesus, unpaid electric bills, magazines, newspapers, fried chicken bones, assorted trash, seventy-two cats (living and deceased) and their associated waste when she dropped a lit Pall Mall onto her bed bug infested urine stained mattress and burned her and her house into oblivion in twenty-five minutes?

But God must have had an ulterior motive. Clearly, Aunt Mildred (aka Crispy Milly) was just a small wheel in the big cog of the inner workings of God's ultimate game plan for her and the universe. Even Mildred knew this.

I, however, prefer to think it was nature's way of thinning the herd, natural selection at work - and at its best.

Seems I’m “Threatened by Christians and our God!” Well, she is half right.

2012-02-01T16:40:00.004-05:00

My review of the NIV Bible on amazon now has over 200 comments. It never seems to stop, attracting religious fanatics and proselytizing nutters seeking to bring me to Jesus. Some of my readers here have commented effectively with reasoned retorts, which I appreciate

One of the latest comments in particular caught my attention and inflamed my ire. Not sure why, perhaps it is because the writer has zero understanding of, or exposure to, atheists and why many of us condemn religious teaching and thought. This was her comment:

Such hateful, evil responses to people you personally know nothing about. If ever there is an example of someone who is so miserable in this life, it would be you. Spending so much time responding so hatefully, I would say you are truly threatened by Christians and our God! Amy L. Wright, 1/28/12 amazon.com

And my reply:

Amy,

I don't have to know someone personally to be disgusted by their knee jerk proselytizing, or the investment of their lives in nonsensical superstition. I'll venture there's a whole lot of people, historical and modern day, who you dislike. That said...

Yes, indeed, threatened is a good word: America is threatened by religious fanatics claiming to all have been called by their Sky Daddy to be president; threatened by rejection of intellect, science and learning preferring myth and blind rejection of objective evidence; threatened by attempts to make this a theocracy at worst, or giving preferential treatment to the majority religion at best. Threatened by fanatical religious intrusion into peoples lives, what they do with their genitalia, wombs, and pursuits of happiness...if that happiness isn't in step with what their imaginary god likes; threatened by Christian ideals which obstruct scientific advancement, or condemns women to bear the children of their rapist or their own relative.

Yes, we are threatened by Christian rejection of global warming; threatened by evangelical fundies' desire to see Israel rebuild the temple on top of an existing Mosque to see the End Times prophesy fulfilled; threatened by their trying to collapse the Wall of Separation between Church and State; threatened by the "true Christians" of Cranston, RI whose harassment and threats of violence toward a 16 year old girl and her family who sued a School for a constitutional violation and won the case requires them to have police protection; threatened by that state’s Representative who promoted hate toward her by declaring this girl "an evil little thing", much like the words uttered before a witch burning by his 17^th century good Christian predecessors.

I'm threatened by religionists’ attempts to dumb down our schools by trying to equate religious myth with science; threatened by religious fervor to go to war at the drop of a hat to fend off "Gog and Magog" as your born again president Bush, Jr. so brilliantly espoused. I am threatened by president GHW Bush's comment that “atheists aren't patriots or maybe not even Americans,” while I and thousands of other "atheists in foxholes" put their lives on the line, or lost them in the service of this nation.

Indeed Amy, I and millions of freethinkers and progressive Christians, feel threatened. And now you have only a very small inkling as to why.

As for your god: I am as threatened by your god myth as you are by Wolfman or Isis or Athena ...probably less so, seeing as how your credulity may well permit you to accept the Wolfman myth as real.

Amy, I'm sure much of this is way beyond your meager ability to comprehend. I doubt you have the reasoning capacity to even understand what half of these things mean. But I'll be happy if you just possess the intellectual curiosity to get to the end of this sentence.

"Christian America”: Where ignorance is a virtue, and intellect a vice

2012-01-27T09:01:00.012-05:00

It takes more faith to be an atheist than a believer in Jesus Christ the Son of God the Father. Especially if you look at science!

Check out answersingenesis.com Wake up and use your brain instead of relying on All this garbage the world has fed you about evolution and self-worship.... Our society has indoctrinated us for so long through the lies fed us from school and gov't, we just swallow it cause it is in our textbooks, do some research and try to not assume what you "know" is truth. Revelation!! Peggy N Oceanside , facebook 1/26/12

The above quote was extracted from a facebook discussion thread. Initially I thought it was a “poe,” an atheist posing as a fundie Xtian to make a point and make them look even more foolish than there were up to that point. It was so classically Xtian insipid that it could be nothing else.

I was wrong. Peggy is a true believer. She has two favorite books: “Bible” and “The Bible”

But why should I have been taken by surprise by this quintessential example of Christian self imposed stupidity? After all we live in a country where willful delusion is a virtue while intellect, science and reason are suspect.

A land where the majority belief system is corrupted by people who see education and “book larnin” as elitist; learned experts as liars or fools; and who have never cracked the cover of the source materials they reject, even if they were literate enough to absorb it.

A nation where speculation and superstition is accepted as fact, and its degree of truth or falsehood determined not by investigative analysis but by the number of people willing to blindly accept it as fact.

A society that puts its faith in religious apologetics sites whose mission is to confuse their sheeple with religious doctrine disguised as science; to dismiss objective evidence for reality; turn fiction into fact; endlessly repeat patently silly and discredited suppositions (i.e. "Why are there still monkeys if..." , "How come there is no crocoduck if... ?"); and to massage scripture to suit their agenda of preserving the spell of a discredited book of nonsense.

A union that gives millions of dollars in tax breaks to build a creationist theme park as a veritable governmental endorsement of backwardness and Medieval Think, spitting in the face of modernity and reason. [Google: “Kentucky creationist theme park tax break”]

There wasn’t much to say after reading Peggy’s post. All I could do was thank her for her testimony. Peggy unwittingly did more in that one paragraph to demonstrate the fruits of the religious virus and give credence to my years of rants, blogs and books than anyone ever has or ever will.

Once again, thank you Peggy. If I could I would put you in a glass dome on a pedestal for the entire thinking world to point to and laugh at, eventually having you stuffed and preserved as a reminder to future generations of Americans just how far they have advanced.

The Week I Wish Wasn’t / the Article I Wish I Didn't Have to Write

2012-01-21T16:11:00.011-05:00

Long time readers will know that as a rule I don’t dedicate this blog to news stories per se, religious or secular. I’ll sometimes draw on current events and and use them as a catalyst for my commentaries, but typically I steer clear of playing religious news blog as there are many hundreds of such atheist blogs. I prefer to share my stream of [un?] consciousness and observations on the human condition as driven by religiosity as personal observations and the mood moves me.

Fact is, I don’t want to write this article; I've been putting it off for days. But there is no turning my back on what has been for me one of the most grotesque weeks of American religious idiocy in memory. Camel's have very good memories.

You’d have to have been in a virtual coma not have heard about the inspiring fight waged by sixteen year old Jessica Ahlquist. A Rhode Island high school student who sued to have her school's Judeo-Christian prayer banner removed, she was victorious. The courts found it violated the school prayer prohibition. A reason to celebrate.

In the wake of that decision, Jessica has been threatened with physical harm and death, harassed, bullied and abused in school, in the press, on the radio, and in front of the family’s home by the good Christian folk of Cranston, RI. She has police protection. How dare she work within the legal system to call out a constitutional violation? Apparently lynching, burning, rioting and setting crosses on fire is the preferred Xtian method of letting one’s concerns be heard, not using her right to petition the courts.

Nothing surprising there, it’s the Christian thing to do. Even the florists of that town conspired to refuse deliveries to her from supporters. The Freedom from Religion Foundation is pursuing legal action against them under the Federal Civil Rights Act. The FfRF also awarded her $12,000 in scholarship money, $10,000 of which came from their new “Atheist in a Foxhole Fund” which awards those who put themselves on the line to oppose religious intrusion into government. Learn more contributing to that fund, and about Jessica’s story here: http://www.ffrf.org/

But here’s the worst part. Peter G. Palumbo (D-Xtian) a RI State representative went on local radio to discredit Jessica calling her “an evil little thing.” Needless to say to the sheeple of Cranston this was perceived as confirmation that making life miserable for Jessica and her family was sanctioned by their elected officials. Their comments on radio station pages and news blogs are hysteria filled hateful rants, religious gibberish, pseudo-patriotic outrage, and absurdly stupid misunderstandings of the law.

Rep. Palumbo has refused to apologize or retract his statement. Google him and you’ll find some half-million hits, mostly from outraged freethinking voices. You’ll also easily find his phone number and email address. I encourage you to use them.

If that was the only disgusting example of Christian inhumanity for the week it would be more than enough. But no, this was a banner week. The Kansas State Speaker of the House, Mike O’Neal (R-Xtian), emailed his endorsement of praying for Obama’s death, invoking Psalm 109. Part of the Psalm reads: ”Let his children be fatherless, and his wife a widow. Let his children be continually vagabonds, and beg: let them seek their bread also out of their desolate places.” O’Neal also defends his actions, and refuses to apologize or rescind his email.

How we doing so far, had enough? Wait ... not done yet.

Simultaneous with these events it came to my attention that some years ago Rick Santorum’s wife had a spontaneous abortion due to a massive infection of her uterus. The fetus would have died with or without the antibiotics she was given, and whether or not she had gone into spontaneous labor – which she did. The fetus died a couple of hours later. They brought it home for show and tell with their kids.

Santorum opposes abortion for any reason, even to save the life of the mother. Yet, when confronted with false reports of his wife submitting to induced labor to expel the fetus and save her life, he let this slip: “if that had to be the call, we would have induced labor if we had to,” under the understanding that the fetus was going to die anyway and intervening would save his wife’s life. http://www.salon.com/2012/01/06/karen_santorum_did_not_have_an_abortion/

Of course Rick Santorum doesn’t in any way perceive that as an abortion. And in the classic use of the word, it isn’t. It would be, shall we say, agreed-upon-medical-intervention-to- provoke-early-termination-of- the-fetus-in-order-to-save-his-wife’s-life. Never mind that the intervention’s end result would be the same as the common method of abortion as far as that fetus would be concerned and if the fetus could think; to the Santorums this would have been a whole different thing. In fact, at a Catholic hospital in Arizona last year a nun administrator permitted doctors to do exactly what Santorum said they would have done under the virtually same circumstances. The nun was excommunicated for saving the life of the mother of three and not letting God and nature run its course. Santorum is a devout Catholic.

I wasn't my usual self this past week. This religiously induced stupidity, hatred, bigotry, distortion, and hypocrisy by good and true loving Christian politicians took its toll on me. I wanted it to just go away. I hasn't, it won’t. It weighs on me.

Tomorrow starts a new week in Idiot America and with it the promise of more uniquely American crazy religious shit. Maybe I need a drink to prepare myself. Maybe I need a vacation in freethinking and sane Scandinavia.

{Invitation to my loyal readership: while I love getting your emails of encouragement, or just to chat, if you have pertinent comments to share on my articles, things other readers would find interesting, or that adds to the story, I encourage you to read my articles on the actual blog site and posting your comments there. Just click on the subject title in the body of the email you receive and it will take you to the blog. I approve all comments before they are visible on-line. Thanks!- Hump}

“Touched by a ghost!” the Hump metes out a sound “Hitchslapping.”

2012-01-16T18:07:00.004-05:00

“I have been touched by a ghost, in the small of my back at an install [in a house where a boy died in the late 1890's and has never left]. I never believed any of the ghost crap before that moment. Since then I have had to rethink a lot of things. That’s what "What if's" are in us for. If you are not open to believing every thing you know is wrong than you are not a free thinker.”

The above comment was posted by someone to a facebook friend’s article dedicated to Christopher Hitchens. Off topic, and completely out of context with the discussion, besides his obvious foolishness this person exposed himself to be another one of those self appointed editors of Webster’s Dictionary - compelled, it seems, to redefine words to better suit his perspective and agenda.

I decided there can be no greater tribute to Christopher Hitchens than to administer to this buffoon the educational “Hitchslapping” he so clearly deserved. Here it is, slightly revised and extended:

Freethinker does not imply entertaining the paranormal because a natural explanation for an event, real or perceived, cannot immediately be ascertained. A freethinker doesn't hear hoof beats in the night and think "Ah ha! Unicorn!" We begin by examining the most reasonable and likely explanation for cause, not with the premise that something for which there has never been any objective evidence is the likely cause. That's quite the opposite from how credulous, unscientific superstitionalists like you think.

To paraphrase Hitchens - as atheists / freethinkers we respect free inquiry, open mindedness, and the pursuit of ideas, but we distrust anything that contradicts science or outrages reason. No where does being a freethinker imply throwing reason out the window and “being open to believing everything” predicated on anecdote and stories. That’s not being open minded, that’s surrendering your intellect to myth, which is a reasonably good definition for “faith.”

Occam's Razor states that the simplest explanation is better than a more complex one, thus more likely to be the correct one. The complexity associated with ghosts, spirits, god/gods, et al, is vast. It is so absurdly intricate / complex that on the list of one-thousand possible explanations it would fall at the bottom, just below invisible aliens. Selecting ghostly encounter as your preferred explanation for this so called event is patently irrational.

You want to believe you were prodded by a ghost? Fine. But this thread is dedicated to someone who was the antithesis of mindless superstionalism. You add nothing to the conversation here except to exemplify the kind of stunted, backward, and archaic non-think that Hitchens fought against his whole life.

Finally (and I mean that literally since I have zero interest in prolonging discourse with those of limited intellect), if you are insulted by your dismissal and the ridicule heaped upon you by the thinking folks here, no one will shed a tear. You're entitled to the same respect as any other insipid religionist who places myth, faith and unsubstantiated belief before reason, reality, and the scientific method - which is to say no respect at all.

I Love the Scent of a Burnt Offering in the Stadium

2012-01-11T19:49:00.008-05:00

News flash: Associated Hump News Service, January 11, 2012:

Immediately following an 85 yard touchdown drive, quarterback Yahuda Ben Cohen takes a moment to send up a burn offering to Yahweh, and perform his patented "Ben Cohen Pose".

Outraged, the Christian fans began to chant "Kill the Christ killing Jew bastard, he's praying in public like the hypocrite Pharisees."

Ben Cohen was summarily stoned to death under a hail of beer cups, hot dogs, nachos, and pork rinds thrown by 105,000 enraged followers of the Prince of Peace.

CBS sports commentators roundly commend the crowd: "The hell bound heathen Jew had it coming. Everyone knows God doesn't hear the prayers of Jews. Besides, this is a football stadium, not some God damned synagogue!"

Film at eleven.

Form over Function & Promotion over Devotion: The Tebow Buffoonery

2012-01-10T16:38:00.006-05:00

“Oh look! Little Timmy is praying again. He has assumed the position. He is so devout!”

“Tim threw for three hundred and sixteen yards against the Steelers - 316 - as in John 3:16, it’s a miracle, it’s God speaking though him!”

Tweets fill the airways exhorting Tim Tebow’s divinely driven drives. Pundits hail him as the missing link of the Trinity (the “Quad-rinity?”). Surely he is in Gawd’s good graces, for how else could a mediocre quarterback with an 8-8 record find himself in the play offs, facing the 13- 3 Patriots (other than due to the remarkably contrived NFL method of selecting play off finalists based entirely on maximizing the league’s post regular season financial revenues)?

I don’t care much about football. I’ll watch a few games a year and the Super Bowl, but otherwise who wins a sporting event is largely unimportant to me. What I do care about is having mindless, raging, ranting, religious idiocy thrust upon me on the radio, TV, internet, and newspapers every weekend, and through the week, day and night for the entire football season. The coup de gras was this display of mass "Tebowing" by the insipid CBS sports casters after the game. http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/01/08/tim-tebow-cbs-crew-tebowing-broncos-steelers_n_1192995.html

I’m disgusted. Oh, not just the kneeling head on hand pose hype and its millions of imitators who by now should be considered as cool as a high five, although that’s annoying enough. It’s not just the speculation by talking heads and religious fanatics about how god favor’s the Bronco’s, and how it is guiding Tebow’s plays and destiny. Nope. I’m used to religious hysteria and fads adopted by the mentally deficient.

What really gets my goat is that no one seems to speak out on the one thing that should be obvious to any student of the bible, and certainly could not be lost on the Xtian clergy. It remains unspoken by the sports talking heads because they are ignorant, or afraid to brooch it. And the clergy won’t address it because they indirectly are beneficiaries of the whole silly fiasco.

What I’m talking about is this- Matthew 6:5-6, Jebus’ own words:
"And when you pray, do not be like the hypocrites, for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and on the street corners to be seen by men. I tell you the truth, they have received their reward in full. But when you pray, go into your room, close the door and pray to your Father, who is unseen. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you.”

Tebow is the quintessential example of precisely the hypocrisy Jebus spoke of. Hell, how less private can you be than taking every opportunity to pray before millions of people to demonstrate your devout holiness? Tebow puts the hip in hypocrisy.

So, where are the admonishments against this obvious ignoring of their man-god’s directive? Where is the outrage from the bible banging fundies or from the clergy who should be chastising him for what is tantamount to un-Christian behavior and denial of the savior’s word? I’ll tell you where it is.

For the bible banging Christian fanatics it’s lost among the other things they cherry pick to accept or ignore. You know, like how they ignore the admonishments of Jebus to observe the 613 laws of the Hebrew Bible until his second coming and “all is accomplished”. They prefer Paul’s edict that those laws are no longer necessary... it’s easier. It’s ignored like they ignore the kosher laws Jebus said should be kept while they happily eat pig and shrimp; yet feverently cling hard and fast to the homophobic laws of the Old Testament. No surprise there, it's institutionalized Xtian hypocrisy.

Tebow is seen by his flock as a general in the army of this nation’s Xtian soldiers. The defender of the 76% Xtian population leading the good fight against the minority 12% - 16% godless heathens who have been “persecuting” them aided by "Obama's war on religion” Rick Perry touts.

As for the Clergy - they know the public prayer thing is not right. But much like the Islamic clerics who remain silent in the face of fanatic Islamic terrorist actions, the pastors and preachers see no benefit in standing up for scripture and against popular appeal. Afterall, what’s in it for them? Fact is, they love the advertising, the promotion of Xtianity that Tebow’s hypocrisy generates. It’s their business and they aren’t paying a dime for the national exposure. They are the Pharisees who epitomize hypocrisy by turning a blind eye to this trespass, while professing their love and respect for scripture... “God’s own word.” They will remain silent and laugh up their sleeves.

Tebow will go on with his pious showmanship born of his parents having steeped his brain in religious foolishness, that’s for sure. But how much longer will we have to endure the mimicry of his mindless followers; his being hailed as Jebus’ representative in the NFL; the invoking of the divine for every pass completion or first down by sports pundits; and his elevation to demigod by religionists whose entire familiarity with scripture is limited to whatever chapter and verse gets painted onto Tebow’s eye black?

That answer will be determined primarily by whether or not the Bronco’s get into and win the Super Bowl, and secondarily by whether my prayers to Moloch to have both his ACLs severed works out.

Teaching the religious their own religion: The thinking man’s burden

2012-01-05T18:17:00.003-05:00

Religionists are a never ending source of amazement to me. From the least educated quasi-literate backwoods bible banger, to those who represent themselves as scripturally fluent and defenders of the faith, the degree to which they have avoided knowledge of the history of religion is remarkable. I’m not talking about other religions; I’m speaking of knowledge of their very own religion’s history and the variety of tenets it has spawned.

I imagine it comes from a profound desire to avoid education, a comfort within the narrowness of their chosen sect, or self imposed avoidance of any education that doesn’t come from their clergy, like minded sectarian authors or favored apologetics sites. Perhaps they have embraced the old saw: “Too much knowledge is a dangerous thing.” If so, they are definitely not in any danger.

A wonderful example of this recently came to my attention. A Christian, apparently irked by my amazon review of the NIV Bible, blessed me with this tiding:
“You and a lot of others who are against the words of God will burn in hell. I'll be on the other side laughing, while you cry in pain.” – B. Bain

Nothing new there. It's all good. I’ve been threatened with, assured of, promised, and condemned to hell so many times by Xtian nutters that if there were such a place I’d probably get my room comped. I thanked him for proving my point, that the Bible’s hideous fables and obscenities has had its desired affect on him, since it is a trait of Abrahamic religions, most specifically Xtianity, to endorse torture and pain either real or imagined on those who eschew their philosophy.

And that would have ended that until one of the faithful, an early and vehement objector to my review and laughably vapid theist, provoked the subject of this blog article with this gem:

“You see how Bart always assumes everyone he doesn't like is a Christian? No bias or presupposition there huh? LOL” - Ob-Servant

“Assume” he is Christian? My retort was an assumption based on a “bias or presupposition?” Hmmm. Could it be that this befuddled dead Jew worshipper, so desperate to sling an invective at me simply has no understanding of the Xtian doctrine that speaks of those in heaven being treated to ring side seats of the eternal torture of the damned burning in hell? I mean, is it possible this could have escaped the purview of a self proclaimed observant Xtian and bible-phile? So it seems.

So I undertook to educate him citing Thomas Aquinas: "That the saints may enjoy their beatitude more thoroughly, and give more abundant thanks for it to God, a perfect sight of the punishment of the damned is granted them."

Citing Jeremy Taylor a 17th century Bishop of England: "Husbands shall see their wives, parents shall see their children tormented before their eyes...the bodies of the damned shall be crowded together in hell like grapes in a wine-press, which press on another till they burst..."

Citing Jonathan Edwards, referred to as “The American Augustine”: “Every time they look upon the damned, it will excite in them a lively and admiringsense of the grace of God...The view of the misery of the damned will double the ardor of the love and gratitude of the saints in heaven."

I could have gone on, as this interpretation of multiple bible passages is endorsed by many Catholics and Protestant sects. Thus, my reference to the hell wisher as being a Christian was anything but an assumption, bias, or presupposition since this belief is unique to Christianity. [Note: Islam may have similar doctrine but it’s doubtful a Muslim would be pissed about my review of the Bible. Koran, sure - Bible, no.)

Evidently this is something my antagonist never quite got around to learning. As a result his knee jerk accusation and obvious desire to paint me as a blind persecutor of his unfairly put upon martyred religion exposed him as both ignorant of his own religion, and a douchebag of epic proportions.

As I type this there is as yet no reply. I wholly expect it to be a half baked tap dance such as “That’s not what I meant, I knew that all along.”, or “You misinterpreted my statement”, or the ever popular “You took my comment out of context,” because intellectual honesty amongst these folks is as rare as a MENSA member at an exorcism.

But, it makes no difference. I did my duty as a thinking person, imparting knowledge to the religiously afflicted about their religion. At least now he too will be able to titter in excited anticipation of watching Anne Frank buring in hell once he reaches his reward.

It’s the Xtian thing to do.

Hump is Chosen by God to Review His New Memoir.

2012-01-01T19:26:00.008-05:00

From time to time, Simon and Schuster sends me a new book of the atheist genre to review on amazon.com. While they don't pay me, it keeps me in reading material.

Some of you will recall I reviewed "Oh God, No!" by Penn Jillette. It sucked, IMO... worthy of only two stars. But this time around I was delighted with "The Last Testament: A Memoir." The co-author, along with God Almighty, King of the Universe, is David Javerbaum who writes for the Daily Show. He is very talented.

So here's the four star review I posted on amazon. I'm sharing it with you for your information. If you're looking for a fun read about the God of Abraham, from the God of Abraham, unquestionably geared for folks like us, you'll like this.

-----------------------------------------------------------------

It seems whenever a book of criticism, humor or sarcasm about the bible or religion comes out those religious fanatics who are so sure they know that a god exists, and who or what this god thing is, seem to get their panties all in a twist. The astute can use the one and two star reviews these humorless defenders of the faith invariably post as an endorsement of a good read. I know I do. That said...

As any objective student of the Bible knows, the god of the old testament comes across as a hideously psychopathic thing. While religionists prefer to deny this, ask them if they'd treat their own children that way and they simply fall back and cry "Context!", which of course means nothing at all. In The Last Testament this god readily admits he's got issues. Fact is, he admits that he and his staff of angels had no second thoughts about mass murder, cruel and unusual punishments and some really bizarre laws. But "God" explains it in a way that almost makes you want to forgive him his trespasses... almost. Sort of like the way you'd forgive a riotously funny comedian for running over your cocker spaniel while making a U-turn in your driveway. Oh, he's not repentant for the wackier things he's done, just reflective. After all, no one is perfect...not even god. How do I know? Because he says so in his The Last Testament.

I found myself laughing until my eyes watered. I kept dog earing the pages with the best lines to use as excerpts to read to my wife, and to use in this review. But it got to the point where almost every page was turned in so I stopped.

Yep, seems all of those self appointed/ self-righteous religious shaman got it wrong about a whole bunch of stuff. God sets it all straight with humor, snarkiness, and pinch of sanctimoniousness (hey, if anyone is entitled to be sanctimonious it would be a god). Everything you ever wanted to ask god about creation, life outside our solar system (yes, there is...lots of it), Muhammad, Jesus (careful you don't get "that look" from Jesus), HG (AKA Holy Ghost), his angel staffers, Moses and his smarter brother Aaron, how Joshua fit the Battle of Jericho, Abraham, Adam and Steve, just about anything you ever questioned is all laid out nice and neat and goddamn funny. Oh, but not the afterlife though. He just won't go there so don't ask.

The only reason I didn't give it a 5 star rating was that I found the book a tad long toward the last fourth and the biting wit cooled down. The prophecies for 2012 could have been left out entirely, tedious. But if you're familiar with the Bible (or think you are); are a freethinker, agnostic, atheist, moderate to liberal believer of any flavor, you'll get a kick out of this read.

On the other hand, fundamentalists, born agains, JWs, tongue talkers, snake handlers, biblical literalists, "Promise Keepers", imprecatory prayer devotees, the pope, televangelists, sellers of prayer towels, and gay-hating admirerers of Fred Phelps, Michelle Bachmann and Rick Perry will likely not get the same enjoyment. Fact is, they'll likely do what they have always done - not buy The Last Testament but give it one star, and rattle off a rant about blasphemy, how the author is going to hell, and then scourge themselves (or their wife or kid) as penance for even thinking about this book.

A Good read.

Last Word for 2011

2011-12-28T21:52:00.007-05:00

HAPPY NEW YEAR TO ALL OF YOU

"POOR LOST SOULS"

HERE'S WISHING ALL OF US A LESS RELIGIOUSLY AFFLICTED 2012

SEE YOU ALL NEXT YEAR

HAVE FUN - BE SAFE - KEEP ON TRUSTING IN REALITY

A Final Incendiary Word on Christmas - ‘Cuz Now I’m Cranky

2011-12-20T16:46:00.004-05:00

Something came to my attention that got my other wise good humored holiday prepped hump in a major twist and I’m not letting it go. So here’s a Xmas rant that I invite you to pass along to any Christians you think might benefit from it.

I read an article about a big brouhaha in Leesburg, Virginia, where ten displays were permitted on public property for the holiday season on a first come, first served basis. As a result, in addition to the usual crèche thing, a number of displays depicted a Pastafarian nativity scene (see picture above), an atheist pine tree, a crucified skeleton Santa as a protest to consumerism, and other non-Jebus / non-Xmas related contributions..

Evidently this created a firestorm among the good Christians of the town, outraged that their one belief isn’t the only permitted display like it has been for years. Here’s the whole story: http://www.usatoday.com/USCP/PNI/NEWS/2011-12-17-bcholiday_ST_U.htm

This one particular quote from an irate Xtian resident really irked me:
“The [Jesus, Joseph and Mary] creche is not religious,” Caulkins insisted, his voice trembling.“It is a belief symbol. You have to believe in something.”

It’s not? You do?

Whenever I read/hear comments like this, or the oft tried “the cross on public land isn’t religious, it’s just in memory of the fallen” I always wonder: are these people liars and frauds who think people are that credulous, or are they just so Christian centric they can’t see the outrageous absurdity of their statement? Either way, it speaks volumes about what religious fanaticism does to ones ability to think.

Here’ a flash for Christians that they can take to the bank: December is not owned by you, as much as you’d like to stake claim to it. You can have your fable, celebrate your preferred man-god myth to your hearts content, but the expectation of your holiday/belief being treated as some unique and necessarily singular claim holder to December, or to public property usage, ain’t gonna happen. Not now, not ever again. Those days are gone, dead and buried, just like your man-god, if he ever existed to begin with. Deal with it, get over it.

And that’s the last I’ll have to say about Xmas for this year.

Confession of an Atheist Camel: Hump’s house looks like Santa Land

2011-12-19T14:31:00.003-05:00

Yes, Virginia... Hump’s house is decorated for Xmas. There, I admit it. It’s out in the open. But in my defense let me remind you, dear reader, that Mrs. Hump is quasi-pseudo-Episcopal Lite-going on Freethinker. That is to say, while she eschews supernaturalism she’s never quite been able to leave her childhood enthusiasm for Xmas and all its traditional secular trappings behind. And why should she?

There is something about the greenery on the porch rail, set with dignified small white lights; the ribbon tied wreaths on the doors; the miniature trees on the mantle and sills; the string of lights on the wreath that’s carefully hung over the moose antlers on great room’s log wall; the pixie elves perched on the window casement with their varied (and somewhat creepy) facial expressions; the Victorian soldier nut cracker, tiny sleigh, antique Santa, holiday candles, and tacky bubbling snowman in the kitchen that brings back a more innocent time and the comfort of childhood. Not necessarily my childhood but my wife’s. I’m comforted by the fact that absolutely nothing says fictional virgin of questionable morals, deluded not-so-wise men, baby Jebus man-god in training, or anything else that can’t be traced back to its pagan or purely commercial roots.

Bottom line - Hump’s house looks as though a flash mob of meth crazed elves ran amok turning it into a bad imitation of “Little House on the Prairie meets Santa’s Work Shop.” It makes Mrs. Hump happy. It’s her only fault.

Soon the sons and their better halves will make the pilgrimage north, bearing gifts and offerings of Xmas cookies and pastries from New York City’s finest Italian bakery. We’ll drink spiked eggnog around the wood stove, listen to classic carols, maybe observe the ancient and little known Xmas tradition of shooting machine gun at the range (weather permitting), chow down on honey smoked spiral cut ham, and retire late on Xmas eve with visions of whatever the Jack Daniels, vodka martinis, and appletinis cause to dance in our heads..

Bright and early (hangover permitting), we’ll gather together to dive into the mountain of gift wrapped treasures, evidence that Mrs. Hump considers it her personal mission to single handedly stimulate the economy. The charge card bills will be enough to make the baby Jebus cry. But that’s not till January, so for now family fun,food, and conspicuous consumption is the order of the day and the reason for the season.

At some point invariably one of my heathen sons will chide me and ask where the Lamb of God is. Without missing a beat I’ll reply with one of my two favorite retorts, either:
“The Lamb of God is where it belongs, glazed with mint sauce and cooking slowly in the oven at 400 degrees where it can’t harm anyone.” or “He’s in the loft getting a hummer from the Sugar Plum Fairy.” And we’ll all laugh ... well, not so much the girls. But we're used to their disapproving looks.

Ah, Xmas! I’m good with it.

Wishing you and yours a happy holiday, no matter what you call it.

In Memory of Christopher Hitchens

2011-12-16T08:32:00.009-05:00

13 April 1949 – 15 December 2011

With the death of Christopher Hitchens we lose a torch bearer of reason, wit, and intellect. Even religionists with whom he debated, and always bested, have chimed in with their acolades of respect... a rare occurance in the scientific age where the battle between reason and faith has reached its zenith.

Death be not proud. Hitchens faced it head on and never stooped to supernaturalism in fear, desperation or weakness. Not many like him will come his way again.

We've lost one of the best among us. Goodbye old friend.

“Our belief is not a belief. Our principles are not a faith. We do not rely soley upon science and reason, because these are necessary rather than sufficient factors, but we distrust anything that contradicts science or outrages reason. We may differ on many things, but what we respect is free inquiry, openmindedness, and the pursuit of ideas for their own sake.” ― Christopher Hitchens, God Is Not Great: How Religion Poisons Everything

Camelize your friends and family: There's still time !

2011-12-14T09:16:00.012-05:00

Warning:

Unabashed marketing ahead. I have no shame.

If you're looking for a last minute something for your freethinking friends and family, or that believer on the brink, there's no better gift.

Autographed and custom inscribed copies of my books, priced below Amazon, are availabe to be shipped Priority Mail 2 - 3 day delivery, direct from the camel's barn now through Dec 20 - for the basic shipping charge.

Click on this link http://atheistcamelrants.blogspot.com/ , make your selection, click on the "Add to Cart" button, and pay via Paypal, or with credit card. My camel elves will handle the shipping upgrade.

Hey, a Christmas/Winter Solstice/Hannuka without an atheist camel under your Saturnalia tree is like a mangod without the obligatory death scene. Enjoy, and thanks!

Trinity of Stupidity: The Hat Trick of statements of religious idiocy

2011-12-10T12:31:00.004-05:00

I am usually subjected to doses of moronic theist statements spaced wide enough apart that they often fly under the blog article radar. But this past week was particularly noteworthy. I hit the trifecta, the trinity, the hat trick of religious stupid.

Episode 1:
Having run out of buffalo burgers, I made a run to “Elmer” my local bison farmer to pick up a few packages of patties. You’ll recall my friendly buffalo meat rancher as the guy who had a birthday party / church gathering and invited me as the token atheist earlier this year (see Aug. 1, 2011 blog).

After completing the transaction Elmer offered that he saw a news story about my Eternal Earth-Bound Pets post rapture pet rescue business in New Hampshire Magazine (news to me, I don’t subscribe.) and asked how business was. He apologetically explained that he only had this one cat and didn’t expect it to live long enough to see the rapture. I assured him that neither of them, nor anyone, will live long enough to see the rapture.

It was at this point he enlightened me: “I wouldn’t be so sure. They found papers in Noah’s Ark that ...” Oh boy.

Now, Elmer is 80 years old and losing it at an astounding pace. I could have had a field day mercilessly bombarding him with reality and heaping a few cubic cubits of ridicule upon him. But not wanting to exacerbate an already iffy mental condition I jokingly inquired if there was a 250 HP Johnson inboard/outboard on the Ark, or was it simply an electric trolling motor. A weak half smile flickered across his confused countenance. I thanked him for the burgers, wet my finger to test the wind, and weighed anchor for home.

Episode 2:
An internet news article reported that three Muslims were arrested in Sweden for plotting to kill the cartoonist who rendered a picture of Mohammed as a dog. The commentary from the readers was, as one would expect, almost unanimously supportive of their arrest and eventual prosecution; voicing support for freedom of expression and derision for the insanity of Muslim sensitivity to their pedophile prophet’s portrayal.

But one respondent, not so surprisingly named “Florida84” offered this brilliant piece of wisdom: “[The cartoonist] had it coming. When you insult someone’s religion you best be willing to pay for your blasphemy with your life.” I was able to detect a strong southern drawl, and even the genetic damage borne of a few generations of inbreeding, right through my laptop.

I proceeded to explain in my most erudite and civil manner that freedom of expression isn’t just for the protection of speech we agree with. Its true greatness, its power, is that it is meant to ensure that even things we find hateful or disturbing are protected. I summed up the lesson with the imagery of Mohammed, Jesus, the Virgin Mary, his mother, and his pet pig engaged in a frenzied carnival of carnal lust; leaving him with the suggestion that his irate jihad, fatwa, crusade or inquisition can be directed to my Langdon, NH camel ranch.

Episode 3.
I’ll be brief, as I discussed this at some length on my Facebook page. I just want it noted here for posterity. I hope my fb friends will forgive my repetition.

The Today Show, Ann Curry interviewing the parents of a model who walked into the propeller of an airplane resulting in the amputation of a hand, destruction of an eye, a crushed scull, massive facial injury and brain damage. Quote: "Do you think it was a miracle?" presumably intending to prompt the hyper religious parents to opine that Jesus opted to intervene and only let the props maim their daughter and destroy her otherwise promising life instead of letting it kill her outright.

I already know Curry to be the journalistic equivalent of a chimpanzee, but this nearly drove me to apoplexy. As one of my very astute fb friends so perfectly put it: “A miracle would have been if the prop gave her a beautiful haircut.” (kudos to “Far Left” for that perfect descriptor of a potential miracle). Any journalist possessing an iota of integrity, dignity and respect for their craft would have told the producer to shove that question up their ass. But not Ann, nope. She oozed that question out of her mouth with all the trademark fake sincerity she could muster.

Unfortunately, I do not have Ann Curry’s email, telephone number, or home address. Actually, maybe it’s just as well.

Yes, it was quite a week. Given the toll it took on my sensibilities I’d gratefully go a month without being subjected to any more theist stupidity. But if past is prologue I’ve probably got a few hours before it starts all over again.

Finally... Proof of God’s existence! Well, almost.

2011-12-04T16:53:00.007-05:00

When one challenges religious precepts invariably there will be an outcry from some self appointed defenders of the faith. This happened last week when I posted my amazon.com review of the New International Version of the Bible, giving it one star and highlighting a few of its ungodly verses. (see Nov. 30 blog article).

Incoherent religious babble; quoting of scripture; proffering pseudo-science; misrepresentation of history; total denial of documented fact, science and even scripture; blatant lies, and religious platitudes flowed like pus from a festering sore when a religious fanatic became enflamed over my disrespectful analysis, as though my single critical review of the horrid book would itself be enough to render it obsolete and impede its sale. If only.

You’d have thought I dug up Jesus’ corpse, dressed it in a prom dress, and brought it to the home coming dance the way he went on. If only.

Anyway, among the crazy statements and rants was this: “It’s easy to prove the existence of God, but atheists are too stupid to understand it.”
A couple of hours later it was edited to read: “It is easy to prove the existence of God (in the theist sense) is [sic] far more plausible than the absence of God, at least to rational people.”

Hmmm ... prove? As in “proof”? Super. Please, cast your pearls of proof before this stupid and/or irrational person. Favor me with your irrefutable evidence that I may be convinced beyond a reasonable doubt. Please, suffer a little waste of your time to permit this unworthy respecter of science and reason, this user of highfalutin – multisyllabic words to be enlightened by your objective evidence that it can be subjected to and sustained by the scientific method.

Oh wait ... proof “in the theist sense.” Uh-oh. I was unaware that proof has multiple meanings depending on whether it is invoked by theists or secularists. I promptly checked the old Funk and Wagnall’s. Nope. No such distinction exists.

Merriam Webster defines proof as the cogency of evidence that compels acceptance by the mind of a truth or a fact; the process or an instance of establishing the validity of a statement especially by derivation from other statements in accordance with principles of reasoning; something that induces certainty or establishes validity.

So...gimme some cogent evidence. Impress me with the validity of your proof predicated in reason. Lay upon me that which induces me to accept the existence of God with a certainty that cannot be invalidated. I shall try hard not to allow my stupidity and irrationality to be an obstacle to this enlightenment. I was primed and ready to receive what no theologian in the history of the planet has ever been able to provide. Alas, I was to be disappointed

No proof followed. Not even an attempt. I guess he rethought that sentence (for a third time.) Perhaps his “proof” of God's existence included things like the beauty of a rainbow, the silence of a forest on snow covered night, the existence of good, the perfect fit of a banana in a man’s hand, rain drops on roses and whiskers on kittens. Perhaps this is what he meant, and he'd be correct, that these things don’t quite constitute the same idea of proof of the divine to us stupid and irrational atheists as they do with his brilliant and rational fellow lemmings.

What religious freaks like this always forget while overcome with the fever and in the throes of their enthusiastic defense of delusion is that by definition “faith” in the supernatural should never, could never, and will never be supported by proof. That’s why it’s called faith.

Hump Reviews the NIV Bible on Amazon.com. The author will be pissed.

2011-11-28T19:22:00.005-05:00

Sorry, God, but your book only rated one star from me. Oh, I wasn’t rating your new fangled more readable and gender friendly New International Version format, no... that was fine with me. It was the story line and plot that got my goat, or donkey, or camel, or whatever.

Ya gotta give amazon.com credit for approving this review, albeit, I get a sense that it isn’t going to be up for long when the religious nutters read it.

Here’s the link catch it while you can: http://www.amazon.com/review/R1VAP69OQ8D07S

And if it’s still there, give my review a “Yes” for helpful, please.

Just in case it’s gone before you get there here’s the actual review as posted:

“As violent fantasies go, this book is a page turner!”
November 28, 2011
By B. Centre (USA)
This review is from: Holy Bible (NIV) (Kindle Edition)

This book has it all. Cutting off women's hands for helping to fend off their husbands' attackers; directing the slaughtering of children with a bear attack and by mass murder; genocide galore; human sacrifice and the threat of it; and killing an innocent on behalf of others to placate himself. It doesn't take much to come to the conclusion that the author is one sick puppy with major issues, namely he is obviously a psychopath.

The author also claims to love all his children, but wow, he sure has a weird way of showing it. When my children disobey me, and I know they will, I almost never throw them out of the house into the street and place a curse on them and their children for all time. And I sure never nail gun them to the playroom wall, well, ok...just that once. But hey, I'm also sane.

In one chapter he demands fealty from everyone and makes it part of his major ten requirements, obviously an ego maniac. In the same list however he neglects to make pedophilia or slavery a crime. I'm guessing those things are ok by him. No wonder so many of his self appointed publicists are child molesters, and that it took 1800 years for slavery to finally be banned by reasoned folks... no thanks to the author.

But look, if you enjoy mass murder, incest, inexplicably hideous and laughable laws, talking snakes and donkeys, the destruction of pigs and fig trees, magic tricks, over one-hundred contradictions, the raving threats of co-author maniacs, the complete rejection of science, reason, reality and intellect and think you need this book to be moral ...then this obscenity is right down your alley.

Credited with dissing and destroying the Bible, Hump basks in the after glow.

2011-11-26T19:02:00.004-05:00

Agitated by a news service blog’s mirthful reference to the KJV’s olde English suffix “th” (e.g. “beholdeth”) which religionists mistake for actual middle eastern ancient Biblical language, a fanatic bible worshipper insisted that the blog authors: ”Please be more respectful of holy things.”

That provoked me. I set out to educate him:

Since when is the antiquity of an inanimate object worthy of universal respect owing to its age or presumed “holiness” by its adherent? It is due respect only from those who foolishly imbue it with supernatural qualities, like an animist fetish, or voodoo doll.

The KJV or any other version of a book of fables, misogyny, societal mind control, and childlike hocus pocus which glorifies genocide, suborns slavery and infanticide, and is used to justify - with divine authority - intolerance, subjugation, and rejection of reality is due as much respect as The Protocols of the Elders of Zion. Screw that, and screw it.

And that would have been that until this reply:

“... you have disrespected hundreds of millions of follower’s belief in the Holy Scripture’s truthfulness ... Consider that you might be endangering the value of those who place value an inanimate object, such as a book or a picture, because you do not value it and say so in such a derogatory and vicious manner and therefore may become as that which you describe.”

Perhaps I was not clear enough.

Your book of fables is due all the respect as is Grimm's Fairy Tales. Now, if I had a first edition Grimm's I would certainly treat it with respect if only for its history, rarity and value.

However, whether first edition or reprint, I would hold its stories of witches, terror, cannibalism, murder in exactly the same reverence as I would your preferred book of fables ... which is to say none.

That this insults 100's of millions of believers (in either the scripture, or Grimm's Fairy tales) is of zero concern to me. That a billion Muslims are insulted and driven to rage by my depictions of Muhammad, and that I credit the Koran with spewing the same degree inhumane, repressive and intolerant lies and trash as I do the bible similarly leaves me nonplussed.

If Hindu devotees are repelled by my depiction of Ganesh eating peanuts; or Mormons don't like my calling their prophet a charlatan, and their book bad sci-fi worthy of derision; or that I mock Neo-Druids, Wiccans, Scientologists, or Cargo Cultists for their equally inane beliefs and rituals, all means exactly the same to me - Nothing.

Christianity, its doctrine and its handbook carries no more weight, validity, gravitas nor warrants any more respect than any other man-made/ self induced delusion or societal control mechanism. That your fellow deluded adherents are troubled by that is fine with me. So, now what? Inquisition? Jihad? Holy war? Fatwa? Crusade? Perhaps a more passive aggressive route ... you'll pray for me?

Finally, I do not endorse book burning. Book burning is largely the provenance of Christians. More books have been burned by Xtians through history and to current time than by all other belief systems, governments, or movements. But If my mocking your scripture, demystifying it, rejecting it for the dangerous and harmful thing it is to humanity is endangering its continuity...well then... I shall redouble my efforts. While I appreciate the credit, and do wish it were so, I am hardly worthy of such an accolade.

But I’ll bask in the glow anyway

Happy Thanksgiving!!!

2011-11-22T20:53:00.003-05:00

Wishing all my friends and readers a safe and happy Thanksgiving holiday.

Christian Rape, Mind & Body - Destroying indigenous cultures & children’s psyches for 500 years

2011-11-17T08:29:00.008-05:00

Consider the following: you’re living peaceably in a land that your ancestors staked claim to a few thousand years ago. You’re practicing your culture, happily. Your rites, your ceremonies, your superstitions have been handed down in the oral tradition generation after generation in myth and fable. Then one day some invading foreign power usurps your land. Bad enough. But adding insult to injury this new culture tells you that you’ll follow their rituals and rites, worship only their one particular loving god or they’ll kill you.

They use coercion. You initially resist, but when that fails you go through the motions. The invading culture suspects heresy and metes out punishment. Figuring the best way to ensure conversion takes root is via the young, they take your kids and send them away to better control their minds and strip the ancient heathen belief system from them. Success is measured by the elimination of the old culture’s beliefs, and the acceptance of the new culture’s ... and body count of those stiff necked traditionalists who resisted. No title of “martyr” for them; just “dead heathen.”

And so it was in the 16TH, 17TH, 18TH, 19TH centuries and into the 20th in North and South America. And so it was in Africa, and the Pacific Basin. And so it was in Australia and New Zealand. For this is the “mission” of Christianity. Destroy indigenous cultures, steal their children’s birthright, rape their minds, and instill the fear of hell and damnation the better to cultivate a love for their mythical “prince of peace” man-god. Save their souls even if it kills them.

No other religion on the planet, save Islam, proselytized by the sword and gun. No other belief system of an invading culture more worked toward the eradication of the conquered culture’s indigenous superstitions. Not the Romans, the Saxons, the Persians, the Greek city states, the Visigoths, the Hun, the Mongols, none of the “barbarian” tribes and cultures. Only Islam rivaled it.

Fact is, considering Christianity's methods and impact, calling those tribes barbarian is a misnomer. For while those tribes conquered and pillaged and laid claim to the spoils, pre and non-Christian conquerors left the vanquished people their birthright - their cultural beliefs and practices. And if those beliefs gradually declined as a result of assimilation, it was not by threat of death or institutionalized brainwashing.

This is the legacy of Christianity. But it doesn’t stop there. It goes on, just more subtly.

As I type this there are hundreds if not thousands of “Christian Group Homes” for troubled children in the US and around the world who are spreading the faith and saving souls through Christian barbarism. Operating under the guise of helping the most vulnerable among us to education, social adjustment and assimilation they rape both their minds and their bodies.

Whether under the auspices of organized churches, or run by self-proclaimed Christian “brothers and sisters” doing “the Lord’s work” these depositories for troubled kids are dispensaries of religious indoctrination, physical, sexual, and mental abuse which will haunt the survivor for her entire life. They flourish today because they are licensed and “blessed” by the states who are more than happy not to have to provide real and meaningful assistance at tax payer expense, and whose monitoring and input to these places are negligible if any at all.

Not until one of these religionist snake pits are exposed due to some outrageous excesses becoming public is there an investigation and intervention by secular authorities who always feign surprise that such a thing could happen. Why? Because Christianity gets a pass. In Western culture if it's Christian sponsored it must be good, the barbaric history of Christian outreach to those who never asked for it not withstanding.

Whether for financial gain or out of this sick need to infest minds and save non-existent souls, the barbarism of Christianity missions will never end until its false attributes of goodness and godliness are stripped away and it’s thrown into the trash bin where the atrocities of history belong.

Coach Paterno’s Religious Play Book

2011-11-10T07:39:00.001-05:00

I am not a big football fan. If someone asked me a week ago who Joe Paterno was, I wouldn’t have been able to tell them. But today, today I’m in awe of Coach Joe Paterno for he has done what I couldn’t do in two books of anti-theist writings.

Notice I said in awe - not respectful, in admiration, or supportive of him, for he is worthy of none of those accolades. I am in awe of Paterno’s chutzpah. Oh, for sure he ran a great team, developed it with hard fought persistence, dedication and leadership. If ones life’s worth were measured by sport or success in his life’s passion, Paterno would be a national hero.

But when it came down to real life, the last play on the goal line of an sterling career, he failed and failed miserably. He chose between a game and children’s wellbeing. He chose between complacency and indignation. He chose between right and wrong. He chose poorly. When it really mattered Paterno fumbled, and fumbled beyond forgiveness.

His termination by Penn State was right and proper, and that would have been the end of it save any legal actions that might befall him as a result of his inaction. I’d have had nothing to comment upon, no further ax to grind with him. But then he said this:

"As you know, the kids that were the victims, I think we ought to say a prayer for them,"

And there, in that one sentence is the very heart of the grotesqueness of religion, the very core of what I have raged about, fought against, and endeavored to put a face on for these many years all summed up nice and tidy by a disgraced coach.

PRAYER?? Say a PRAYER for the child victims? You self righteous sanctimonious jerk... some of those kids are victims partially because you failed as a man. You relinquished your responsibility as a human being. Your hubris and self interest over shadowed those victims interest. But, now, NOW you’ll implore us to mumble words to a nonexistent thing in the sky as though that will fix things? As though those kids’ lives will be repaired by words to a deity when your own misbehavior, self-serving actions, or apathy was a causal factor for their pain?

No Joe, the only thing that can help these kids now is years of therapy by trained child psychologists. Your call to prayer to millions of your fans and followers won’t do a damn thing for those kids, it never has and it never will. Thanks anyway. And as a Hail Mary play to repair your image- forget it, that’s been tried by fools, frauds, and tyrants for eons. It’s the hall mark of disgraced religionists to drop back into supernatural mode and punt, the better to distract from their failed humanity and inability to carry it across the line.

Sorry Joe, no supernatural platitudinous hackneyed “let us pray” is going to erase your penalty, remove the shame, shift blame, salve things over, or heal wounds. You dropped the ball big time. Invoking your imaginary god and supernaturalism may have worked for your half time locker room pep talks...it doesn’t work in the real world, it only makes it worse.

(Thanks to Rachel H. for the inspiration for this article)

The Indefensible Defense of Marriage Act: The Ultimate Religionist Hypocrisy

2011-11-07T19:03:00.006-05:00

Back in 1996 Bill Clinton signed into law the Defense of Marriage Act. It says that the federal government does not recognize same sex marriages, even if the states pass laws permitting them. So in the eyes of the Federal government, gays legally married in MA, or NH, or any state where permitted by law, are not in fact legally married. The law still stands.

No surprise that this law was pushed by the GOP. It was introduced by Bob Barr, R-Georgia (above left), who himself was divorced in 1985, accused of infidelity. The GOP loves meddling into peoples’ personal lives and genitalia. What is a surprise is that law passed the House 342 to 67...with half the votes of Democrats being in favor of the law, while only one Republican voted “no”. It passed and the Senate 85 to 14, again almost half the Dems voted yes, while 100% of Republicans voted yes.

Worst of all, President Bill Clinton signed it into law. Of all the Democratic presidents, Clinton should be the last one to get involved with “defending” marriage. After all, it’s not like his marriage is anything more than a sham and marriage of convenience to begin with.

Naturally the God-fearing GOP and their clergy supporters invoked the name of God, warning of his being offended; immorality; the impact homosexual marriage has on diminishing and destroying the blessed institution of hetero-sexual marriage; and all of the insipid, mindless and silly rhetoric one has come to expect from the defacto Party Of God and Hate.

Divorce between men and women in the US hovers around 50%, it has for many years. In the Bible Belt divorce rates are the highest in the nation*. Along with Barr, Newt Gingrich (above right) pushed this act. He is famous for his having dumped his wife of many years for a new girl friend while his wife was undergoing breast cancer treatment. The numbers of married Republicans (and Dems) who have cheated on or divorced is legion, too long to be recapped here. Let it just be said that besides Bill Clinton, many of our elected officials who signed that grotesque piece of legislation have strayed, been exposed, shamed, and/ or filed for divorce - self righteous God believers all.

One can only wonder how allowing gays to marry could undermine the institution of marriage or cause marriages to dissolve any worse than they already do; or somehow encourage straights not to marry. And exactly why does the government care about marriage to begin with? How it is governmental business as to who gets married, who gets divorced, who is living together, who is celibate, and whose genitalia is going where among consenting adults defies explanation. It certainly isn’t constitutionally directed.

And exactly WHOSE marriage needs “defense,” much less defense by a bunch of mealy mouthed two faced religionist hypocrites whose instances of sexual misconduct and infidelity is rivaled only by the President of Italy, Catholic priests, and Baptist youth ministers?. I challenge anyone to find a single married couple who will confirm that the Defense of Marriage act either encouraged them to marry, or saved their marriage. Not one will be able to point to a family member, friend, associate or acquaintance whose marriage was encouraged, or divorce forestalled by this Act of Congress. Similarly, I’ll venture that you’ll never find any intellectually honest and sane person who can reasonably explain and support how gay’s getting married has or will destroy their or anyone else’s heterosexual union.

How do I know this? Simple; I asked Mrs. Hump if she feels our marriage of forty-one years needs governmentally directed defense, and if she has any inclination to divorce me if the Defense of Marriage Act is ever over turned. She told me that even with my sagging hump and hideously annoying camelus dromedarius disposition she’ll always be my wife... then told me I’m an idiot for asking and to go fix my own dinner for asking such a question.

Ah, the institution of marriage! Why should heteros be the only ones to be institutionalized and given the opportunity to divorce?

* divorce rates in the Bible Belt: http://articles.cnn.com/2011-08-25/living/divorce.bible.belt_1_divorce-rates-lower-rates-marriage?_s=PM:LIVING

The Bamboozling of America: Thank God for the GOP

2011-11-02T08:54:00.005-04:00

I don’t give a fiddler’s damn about Kim Kardashian, her ass, her marriage, her divorce, her family, or anything about her/them. Nor do I give a flying rat’s Kardashian that Bernie Madoff and his wife allegedly attempted suicide...and tragically failed. I’m not about to drop $25.00 much less 25 cents to read the son’s and wife’s self serving book.

I will not waste any more time than it takes to type this sentence to wonder who gets voted off Dancing with the Wanna Bes, The Island, or The Race, The X Factor, The American Idol, The So You Think You Can Talk and Chew Gum at the Same Time show, or any other contrived non-reality reality shows with their insipid hosts, contestants and judges.

Other than expressing my disdain, I could not care less about the drunken excesses of stereotypical low life, under educated white and semi-white Italian American trash portrayed on Jersey Shore... albeit, I do hold out hope to hear someday that they all contracted a new and incurable strain of venereal disease.

While I have always reviled knee jerk conspiracy theories, I’ve permitted myself to engage in a flight of fantasy and pondered if the media isn’t somehow in cahoots with a covert segment of the government to placate and distract Americans from genuinely important issues that could rouse them to indignation and action. In as much as these mind numbing people and programs are so important to 90% of the adult American population, can it be we are being fed the equivalent of what the Circus Maximus and gladiatorial games were to the Roman masses?

Yesterday I saw evidence that this theory may not be as far fetched as it sounds. The House of Representatives, or more succinctly - the Republicans in control of the House of Representatives- announced it was going to hold a vote to reconfirm “In God We Trust” as the official US motto. That’s right - this monumental issue, critical to the health and well being of the nation, will be brought to a vote. Why? Did some leftist god hating Dem propose bringing back the more sensible and inclusive “E Pluribus Unum”? No! Was a secret cabal of atheist congressmen planning to force through a constitutional amendment to remove the idiotic theocratic misstatement from our currency and coinage? Not likely.

Would reaffirmation of the motto (which any child of twelve could see has as much chance of failing reaffirmation as Newt Gingrich has of growing an adult size penis) some how improve the unemployment picture? Will it reduce housing foreclosures? Can it help resolve the deficit? Any chance it will stabilize the financial markets, improve the economy, stop global warming, resolve the illegal immigration question / secure our borders, make us safer from terrorism, bring an end to the Afghan war, improve our public schools' performance, lower rising health care rates, reduce the national obesity epidemic, or lessen our dependency on foreign oil? Nope.

But what this absurd waste of time, energy and money will do is raise an issue where none exists. It will falsely inflame the ire of Christian theocrats and Christian Nation advocates as though there has been some concerted effort to destroy their god and their mindless, meaningless and exclusionary motto along with it. It’s a slight of hand, a diversion of monumental proportion by the GOP. It will distract from the fact that they are stone walling ... doing nothing that will help the people, the nation, or the president because to do so would not be in the best interest of the Republican Party this close to a presidential election. It comes down to this: “Let the nation and the real issues be damned ... we have a motto to reconfirm, a God to protect, and a new president to elect!”

Thus, they wrap themselves in a flag, wave their crosses, imply the motto is under threat, assure the people that God likes and wants this motto; that God will forsake the US if we don’t keep the motto; that this motto is what makes us good and great (while the motto Allah Akbar / God is Great, makes the Islamic extremists evil).

Less savvy freethinkers will become animated and enthused at this wonderful non-opportunity. The religionist masses will rally to the cause, baa in agreement, revile the godless among them, while in the next breath they will praise Bruno for giving so-and-so a 10 on their fox trot.

And America will go on - fat, deluded, stupid, on the brink, and unimproved. Thank god for the GOP.

This Man is Unqualified for the Presidency

2011-10-27T19:31:00.003-04:00

The Values Voters Summit was an October gathering of the most extremist born again right wing theocratic thinking rabid-sheep the nation has to offer. The GOP candidates were summoned before them to give their reasons why they deserve the votes of these God Fearing men and women. Each of them took their turns at the microphone, trying to impress the hallelujah crowd with their holiness and commitment to being guided in office by their faith and solid Christian credentials.

During that assembly Bryan Fischer of the American Family Association – an extremist fundamentalist Christian organization - took the podium and declared that the Religious Right should only support the candidate with a “sincere, authentic, genuine Christian faith.” (He also said they must reject any candidate who backs evolutionary theory instead of Creationism). That disqualifies Romney and Huntsman on both counts.

Given this litmus test for the GOP Presidential candidate- Abe Lincoln, arguably the greatest president this nation has ever had, would not get the Religious Right’s vote for the nomination. They would have sent William H. Seward or Salmon P. Chase up against Stephen A. Douglas, the democratic Presidential Candidate. Lincoln could never have passed the religious test of today’s Super Christians; his own words would disqualify him. Among them this:

"The Bible is not my book nor Christianity my profession." -- Abraham Lincoln

And as though that needed any corroboration there was this statement after his death:

"Mr. Lincoln had no hope, and no faith, in the usual acceptation of those words."-- Mary Todd Lincoln

The GOP which has proudly proclaimed itself “The Party of Lincoln” would, by Fundamentalist standards, rejected their name sake.

Who knows what course the nation would have taken had that Christian requirement been applied in 1860.

How much longer would slavery have continued?

Would the slaves ever have been emancipated?

Could a black man ever have run for the presidency today?

Would the nation have split in two permanently?

Would the victor in the war have saddled the vanquished with reparations and crippling penalties?

We can only speculate.

But there is no speculation as to how Fischer, Reverend Jeffries, and their mindless supernaturalist theocratic ilk would have responded to Lincoln’s candidacy. He was a damnable heathen unworthy to hold office. And we don’t even know what he thought of Darwin.

"The Party of Lincoln,” indeed. The Republican Party today holds nothing in common with Abraham Lincoln. The very words and actions of the GOP defile his name. The only thing they remotely have in common is death: Lincoln in physical form, the GOP by virtue of their intellect.

“Get ‘em while they’re young”: No coincidence it’s the pedophile’s and religionist’s mantra

2011-10-23T14:45:00.006-04:00

What does a pedophile predator and religious indoctrination have in common? More than most people realize. They both follow the doctrine of “Get ‘em while they’re young.” They both use an attractive gimmick like candy, or a toy, or a puppy to entice their victims. They both have permanent and negative long term impact on the lives, the psyches, of their victims. And both are obscene, while only one is illegal.

A facebook friend* recently posted a video to my page. It was part of a cartoon aired by EWTN, a Catholic TV programming network, geared toward infants and toddlers. It shows a cartoon like baby Virgin Mary or a baby nun (see photo above) gleefully smiling and singing under the crucified body of her “son”. There are a series of these DVDs available to Catholic parents, geared toward the ages “0 to 5 yrs.” That’s ZERO to FIVE years old! One can imagine that the parents who buy these things are living in fear of their newborn child falling under the spell of Satan, or being possessed by a demon, or worse... stumbling across a secularist with their filthy immoral ways and their rejection of religious nonsense before they get out of diapers or into pre-school.

Then there is this delightful video. Gawd only knows what this image is intended to convey to an infant or toddler http://www.throughthefamily.org/holybaby2.jpg
A child priest? Clearly being a priest is just the “funnest” thing in the world. Jesus loves child priests. Priests are just big kids. Now there’s a message you want your toddler to embrace in this day and age. Maybe growing up to be a priest is the bestest thing in the whole wide world! Note the puppy.

What says Jesus loves you better than colorful wooden baby sized rosary beads with cross for your infant to suck on or stick in her eye? The intent is clear: to take this blank slate infant’s mind and accustom it to handling religious paraphernalia so it becomes second nature in a few years.
http://www.catholicmissionaryfamily.com/2010/10/rosary-and-kids-part-4.html

I have considered this phenomenon carefully and have come to the conclusion that indoctrination of babies and toddlers to mindless superstition ranks as one of the most obscene, despicable, and grotesque religious perversions ever conceived. I cannot imagine what the comparable efforts of similarly fanatical atheist parents would be. Perhaps giving the infant a miniature copy of The Origin of Species? A stuffed Darwin doll? A video of a child-like Madalyn Murry O’Hair , or Hitchens or Dawkins figure singing and dancing with puppies while praising the wonders of secular thought, science, reasoning and questioning?

No, atheists aren’t so insecure in their grasp of reason and their rejection of superstitious foolishness to be compelled to perpetrate such things on their children. Freethinking parents understand the value of allowing a child to grow, explore, question, and think.

There’s a fine line between imparting social values, providing guidance, and cultivating a well adjusted child; and co-opting a child’s mind to infest it with his parents’ beliefs or non-beliefs in an effort to avert any possibility of independent thought through the developing years. Marketing religion to infants crosses that line.

But maybe I’m being too rash. In fact, perhaps this represents an opportunity. I’m picturing a line of religious relics for ages 0-5 years. Catholics are big on relics. I’m picturing a mobile made up of baby sized replicas of Jesus’ foreskin; a rattle made from replica nails used to crucify Jesus, blood stained of course; maybe a smiling child like Saint Peter doll, who, in keeping with tradition is crucified upside down naked. A series of devotional DVDs, with forty-two children being torn to pieces by cute teddy bears, or a little girl having her hand cut off by a smiling neighbor boy child; or happy smiling Hebrew children putting happy smiling pagan children to the sword - all documented in the bible as good things.

But the child leper doll and its leprous puppy which oozes pus and says “Thank you baby Jesus for healing us.” when you pull its string would be the crown jewel of the line. It would almost be a sin for a devout loving Catholic parent to resist.

* Thanks to my friend Kay Patterson for providing the inspiration for this article.

No Fool like an Old Christian Fool: End of World Round 4

2011-10-17T20:56:00.002-04:00

October 21 is fast approaching and with it the End of the World...again. The multi-millionaire religious broadcaster and doomsday nutter Harold Camping has recovered from the stroke he suffered following his May 21 failed rapture prediction and is just lucid enough to assure us this time he's not fooling around.

Harold says that there is no mistake, it's certain and it ain’t gonna be pretty. The world will come to a sudden and immediate end on October 21. No period of Tribulation, no mincing around with the Anti-Christ for seven years. Only those who were selected by God during the May 21 non-event (his latest explanation for what happened on May 21 that wasn’t discerned by anyone but him) will be saved. The rest of us, and the planet Earth, will cease to exist in a blinding flash of fire and earthquake. That would be the quintessential hell and brimstone end.

The media is pretty much ignoring him this time. Well, the major media outlets anyway. The Christian Post, an online source of religious idiocy geared toward Christians who just can’t get their fill of daily delusional douche-baggery, has published no fewer than four stories on Camping’s latest prediction. http://global.christianpost.com/news/harold-camping-oct-21-rapture-preacher-takes-engineer-approach-to-reading-bible-58317/

Even while they dismiss Camping as wrong headed...or just wrong, it appears they just can’t break the habit of sucking at the teet of any religious whore that happens to carry a bible or wear a cross around his or her neck. I can’t even conjure up a situation that would be analogous to this fixation in a secular context. It’s peculiar to Christians it seems.

Unlike the May 21 foolishness, this predication doesn’t do much for my Eternal Earth-Bound Pets post rapture pet rescue service. Last May I was up for as long as 36 hours straight doing interviews all over the world by phone and Skype every thirty minutes. This time I received only one email from one hapless and not too savvy reporter asking if I’ve seen an up-tick in business. I called her and schooled her on Camping’s new and improved explosive prediction, explaining that the planet becoming a ball of fire and crinkled up cinder doesn’t exactly encourage the sale of pet rescue contracts. She sounded genuinely disappointed that I had nothing more to offer.

Maybe as the 21st approaches, and assuming it’s a slow news week, we’ll see more on this. Not likely we’ll be seeing buses carrying signs declaring the End is near filled with hopeful Christians welcoming the Earth’s demise. They seemed to have decided to sit this one out probably because having been burned three times by Camping since 1994 they want to retain what dignity they still have, and not to expose themselves to anymore ridicule than absolutly necessary.

As for Camping? He has no dignity. He has partial use of his brain, lots of money, a massive dose of prophet-envy, a terminal case of religiosity, and one foot in the grave. Perhaps on October 22nd Harold will summon just enough dignity to lower the other foot.

“Cult!” as though it’s a dirty word

2011-10-12T20:25:00.002-04:00

cult noun
1. a particular system of religious worship, especially with reference to its rites and ceremonies.
2. an instance of great veneration of a person, ideal, or thing, especially as manifested by a body of admirers
3.the object of such devotion.
4. a group or sect bound together by veneration of the same thing, person, ideal, etc.
5.Sociology . a group having a sacred ideology and a set of rites centering around their sacred symbols.

Recently, in an attempt to discredit Mitt Romney, a Texas Evangelical preacher and supporter of Rick Perry referred to Mormonism as a cult. This drawling, inbred, worshipper of a dead Jewish figure who was either a charlatan sorcerer, or a Cynic preacher, or a befuddled maniac, or a social revolutionary, but clearly a composite of various pre-Jesus man-god myths is casting aspersions by using “cult” as an epithet to diminish Romney’s suitability for office.

Of course, he is correct. Mormonism is a cult. It satisfies every definition of cult. So too do the Baptists, the Methodists, the Catholics, Episcopalism, JWs, the Snake Handlers, Shakers, Quakers, and every other denomination or sect of Christianity. The early Romans writers referred to Christianity as a cult / cultus. Of course to religionists their form of cult isn't a cult at all...as though the term "religion" has more credibility and less dangerous connotations.

Oh, no doubt the befuddled bible banging twerp meant to use the term in the vernacular, where cult has taken on a sinister meaning reserved for 20th century upstart societies of outcasts misfits, and freaks. You know them as the Heavens Gate suicidal Nike wearing whackos; the Branch Dividian, Waco Texas human torches; the Kool Aid slurping followers of Jim Jones; Fundamentalist Mormons polygamist child rapists; and the ever lovable and completely deluded followers of a notorious charlatan sci-fi writer who invented Scientology.

It used to be said that the difference between a religion and a cult is its financial solvency. If that’s true, Mormonism, and Scientology are full fledged religions, having amassed a treasury that would put many third world countries to shame. But the fact is a religion by any other name is still a cult, and vice versa.

The only people who do not have rites and rituals; who eschew veneration of a person or an ideal; who have no object of devotion around which they kowtow; who are bound by no ideal or ideology; and who reject sacred symbols - are atheists. If anyone has the right to refer to religious groups as cults, in the vernacular sense or by the dictionary definition, it’s us.

To the undereducated, right wing, stone throwing, holier than thou, Gawd fearing mainstream worshippers of a myth imbued dead man this of course is impossible to comprehend. They will argue against the dictionary definition. They will insist they are exempt from the definition of cult. But the fact is this nation has had a cultist as its head of state ever since Thomas Jefferson left office. We’ll have another one in 2012.

Damn...I miss Jefferson.

“Look!! It’s Jesus!!” He's everywhere, He's everywhere!!!

2011-10-06T19:57:00.004-04:00

The human brain is a marvelous thing. But in the cranium of the wrong people it becomes a source of confusion and delusion that is so strong, so powerful, that it transcends all reason.

We have all watched clouds pass on a summer’s day, and pointed at the various faces and figures they seem to morph in and out of. Most of us have looked at the figure of a slab or marble, or board of pine wood and imagined the grains or the knots looking back at us like eyes in a face. The “man in the moon” is readily identifiable to us.

It’s perfectly normal. The human brain has accustomed itself to affixing a recognizable image to certain random patterns, especially those that resemble the human face. Social scientists attribute this to an ancient survival instinct where being able to identify a friend’s or foe’s face in an instant, even if partially concealed, could mean the difference between life and instant death... for someone.

This phenomenon is called Pareidolia: The tendency to interpret a vague stimulus as something known to the observer, such as interpreting marks on Mars as canals, seeing shapes in clouds, or hearing hidden messages in reversed music. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pareidolia

But unlike rational thinking people who dismiss the image of Mickey Mouse, or the naked torso of Kim Kardasian in a pile of steaming dog feces as simply a natural and normal trick of the mind, to the religious it’s much more serious and meaningful.

We’ve all seen or heard about the religious’ tendency to see the Western European interpretation of the likeness of Jesus or Mary in grilled cheese sandwiches, in stains on concrete buildings, in the warped glass of a building, or on an outhouse floor. Not surprisingly these images appear usually to devout Christians.

No surprise either that an equally devout Muslim will just as readily see the name of Allah, in Arabic Naskh script, in things like tree bark, the arrangement of fruit seeds, clouds, or in a rash on their kid’s ass. Google “name of Allah in nature” and the examples are endless, and remarkably idiotic.

The Muslim won’t see the face of Jesus or Mary in their slab of burnt camel meat, and the Christian sure isn’t going to see Allah’s name scrawled in his grits and hog jowls. They will only pick up on imagery of their preferred religious icon. Oh sure, they’ll see Mickey Mouse in a cloud just like normal folk, and dismiss it as a natural event. But when Jesus floats by wearing a crown of thorns, a diaper, and carrying a cross ...well, THAT’S a sign from Gawd! What exactly it’s a sign of is determined by how mentally impaired and religiously stupefied one is. That, or their respective denomination.

What’s the harm in this? None as far as I’m concerned or can discern. It’s simply a by product of the delusion of religion which makes it’s adherents all too ready to accept a supernatural explanation for natural events. Besides, it’s entertaining and gives us just one more reason to laugh at the feeble minds that are attracted to, or created by, supernatural belief.

Yep, harmless until the day the addled mind of some religiously afflicted drone sees Jesus in a pool of his own vomit while listening to a recording of a Christian rock band played backwards that’s telling him that ripping off a few hundred rounds from his AK at the local NASCAR race is God’s will.

Crazy religionists.

Bizarro World Lives!!

2011-10-01T16:10:00.003-04:00

Back when I was an avid comic book aficionado DC Comics ruled my literary world. Superman was one of my favorite characters and I looked forward each month to his latest exploits and feats of daring do. This is where I came to learn of Bizarro World.

Bizarro World was an imaginary planet in another galaxy that on the surface paralleled Earth... but in the opposite. The planet was a cube, not a sphere and philosophically everything was backwards. Pretty was scorned, ugly was admired; perfection was evil, imperfection / distortion was good; intelligence was condemned and ridiculed, while backwardness/ignorance was praised. It made for some interesting stories.

I didn’t know it then but Bizarro World wasn’t a complete fiction or an imaginary planet. It may well be that the writer who developed this strange venue was commenting on civilization and foretelling the future, much as Orwell did with Animal Farm and 1984. If so he was frighteningly on target.

Recently the president of the Southern Baptist Theological Seminary said that capital punishment is “pro-life”; by deduction then being anti-death penalty must be assessed as being “pro-death.”

The Bible preaches that life is tribulation and pain - a curse caused by Original Sin in the Garden of Eden; true happiness and ones “reward” comes when you die.

For centuries the church has deemed thinking, questioning, and reason the great evil, the enemy of faith; it encourages unquestioning blind faith and the acceptance of ancient fable devoid of evidence deserved of praise.

The preponderance of scientific proofs for ancient Earth, the Big Bang, and evolutionary theory is all “deception”; while the deception, promoted by shaman, of the scriptural myths devoid of evidence is “truth.”

The pope condemns condom use and blames it for contributing to the spread of AIDS in the Third World; while he asserts that only belief in Jesus as ones savior curtails the spread of the disease.

To Mother Teresa the physical suffering of the terminally ill was good. She told tortured sufferers and the soon to be dead that pain was “Jesus kissing you”; all the while she withheld pain relieving medications. Painful death good, comfortable death bad.

Their man-god deemed praying in public to be avoided as a great hypocrisy; mass pray- ins, praying at graduation ceremonies, football games, and at legislative sessions are promoted by politicians and shaman.

The bible preaches that the rich cannot enter heaven; while millionaire preachers accumulate luxury cars and mega mansions with the contributions of millions of their often impoverished followers.

To Evangelicals war and unrest in Middle East is to be welcomed as part of God’s ultimate plan; anyone who promotes peace in the region is The Anti-Christ.

Christians tout Jesus as the “Prince of Peace,” Muslims claim the “Religion of Peace”; yet the most devout among them are pro-war, seek to suppress or kill gays, and perform acts of terrorism across the globe.

The list of bizarre contradictions promoted by a segment of our population in complete contrast and diametrically opposed to a civilized society continues on. You can probably add to this brief list of Bizarro like codes if you think about it. Bizarro World lives! Not on some distant planet, but here, now, on Earth. But its name is Religion World.

Did God hear the prayers for Troy Davis - or just against Troy Davis?

2011-09-22T21:13:00.004-04:00

Last night Troy Davis was executed in Georgia for the 1989 murder of a police officer. I don’t have to recap all the facts and circumstances in detail; the fact that seven of the nine eyewitnesses have recanted, another man has confessed, and three of the original jurors said knowing what they know now, they’d have voted to acquit – it’s all been widely reported.

I don’t know if he was guilty or not. I do know there was enough information to warrant reducing the sentence from death by lethal injection to life imprisonment. But this is all water down the River Styx now.

Friends and family of Davis met regularly to pray with and for him. Supporters, ministers, the Pope all prayed the truth would out, that Davis would get justice, that mercy would be shown, that his life would be spared. As the hour of his execution approached crowds prayed for some miracle...a divine intervention. It didn’t happen.

Now, the faithful will tell us that their prayers were answered, but God said “No.” That God had a bigger plan for Davis. That he took him for a reason we can’t understand. I expect that they will eventually get around to saying God sacrificed this man on the lethal injection table just like god sacrificed his son on the cross, in order to save the world from future injustices by wrongful execution. It’s all rather predictable.

But somewhere, lurking in the shadows of religious zealotry, there are people who are praising the Lard for Davis’ death. They are thanking God for answering their imprecatory prayers that this “nigra” killer of a white police officer pays the ultimate price. They are likely the same folks who applauded Perry’s execution record. Good Christians who seek God’s vengeance on the weakest, the most downtrodden, the least among us.

Somewhere, most certainly in The South, these Jesus lovers are lifting a long neck beer to Jaay-zus in thanks that their prayers have been heard and God said “Yes!”

Seven questions for Rick Perry

2011-09-15T15:12:00.005-04:00

When the GOP presidential wannabes brought religion into the race they opened the door to questions relative to religious perspectives in their professional and personal lives. The most overt offender is Rick Perry, with Bachmann not far behind. But since Bachmann has as much chance of winning the nomination as she has of growing a penis, or Sarah Palin has of developing a fully formed brainstem, it is Perry who needs to belly up to the bar and answer some questions.

Unfortunately the media is largely uncomfortable posing the fundamentalist nutter challenges. On the rare occasions where religion questions are raised the candidates quickly take the offensive and claim media bias, or adamantly protest that their religious comments were taken out of context. This tends to make the media less than aggressive lest they be perceived as partisan or worse...atheist.

Therefore I composed a list of questions which were submitted to Rick Perry through his site Here are the questions I think the American freethinking public, and all liberty loving voters, are entitled to have answered by Gov. Perry.

As a pet owning , Pre-Tribulation Rapture believing Christian, have you made arrangements for the care of your pets in the event the Rapture occurs in their lifetime? If not, why do you condemn your pets to a slow and hideously agonizing death by thirst or starvation?

Since you have openly declared man made global warming a fraud at worst, or a scientific error at best, and reject the opinions of 98% of climatologists who state it is real; if 98 cardiologists said your child needed immediate heart surgery and would die if he didn’t have it, and 2 said there was no problem, would you similarly ignore the advise of the 98% of those people of science?

Back in April you appealed to your Texan constituents to join you in prayer to God to end the drought. After six months the drought has still not been broken, and worse...it seems God saw fit to permit the worst wild fires in the state’s history. How do you reconcile that with a loving God, a God who hears the prayers and desperation of his creations, and the efficacy of prayer? And on a related note: since you claim that “political office is a pulpit”, and God put you in it and gave you the original “calling” to run for president; wouldn’t it be reasonable to believe that God’s fiery reply to your prayer for rain is an indicator he changed his mind? Will you obey him and remove yourself from race for the nomination?

In May this year you were quoted as saying “It’s time to just hand it over to God and say ‘God, you’re going to have to fix this.’ ” as a way to resolve the country’s most pressing problems. Have you officially handed it over to God to resolve our economic and social problems? If not, why not? If so, why do we need you to be president, why can’t God just be president and have a democrat as a vice president? And a follow up to that question: If God is now responsible for fixing things in this country, how long must we give him to resolve the problems? Will it be in God’s 1st or 2nd term? If things get worse under God’s administration would you lead a movement to have him impeached? Or would you just ignore the failure, like the pray for rain fiasco, and come up with a new religious platitude about God ?

If elected to the presidency, do you plan to sponsor and lead national Christian only-Jesus praising-prayer meetings, like you did in Texas - joining forces with Christian Dominionist radical clergy of whom at least one sees the Statue of Liberty as a symbol of Satan? Or will you also be promoting Hindu, Muslim, Wiccan, and other religious prayer meetings that exclude Christians? If so, for what purpose, since your last prayer rally didn’t have any practical value or measurably beneficial affect? Or will this just be your version of the Nuremberg rallies?

As a dedicated lover of Jesus the “Prince of Peace,” how do you reconcile your being the greatest executive executioner in our nation’s history? Since you have no qualms talking on behalf of Jesus and since Jesus was himself a victim of capital punishment, what would Jesus say about it and the apparent glee your Christian supporters have exhibited over your execution record?

Relative to the US being a “Christian Nation” as you have implied and as many of your supporters have asserted, how do you reconcile that perspective with the words and will of some of our most respected Founders?:

“Believing that religion is a matter which lies solely between man and his God, that he owes account to none other for his faith or his worship, that the legitimate powers of government reach actions only, and not opinions, I contemplate with sovereign reverence that act of the whole American people which declared that their Legislature should "make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof," thus building a wall of separation between Church and State.” - Thomas Jefferson, letter to Danbury Baptists, 1802

“Christianity neither is, nor ever was, a part of the common Law.” -Thomas Jefferson, letter to Dr. Thomas Cooper, February 10, 1814

“I am for freedom of religion, and against all maneuvers to bring about a legal ascendency of one sect over another.” - Thomas Jefferson, 1799

“The day will come when the mystical generation of Jesus, by the Supreme Being as his father, in the womb of a virgin, will be classed with the fable of the generation of Minerva in the brain of Jupiter.” - Thomas Jefferson, letter to John Adams, April 11, 1823

“The United States of America have exhibited, perhaps, the first example of governments erected on the simple principles of nature; and if men are now sufficiently enlightened to disabuse themselves of artifice, imposture, hypocrisy, and superstition, they will consider this event as an era in their history. ... . It will never be pretended that any persons employed in that service had interviews with the gods, or were in any degree under the influence of Heaven, more than those at work upon ships or houses, or laboring in merchandise or agriculture; it will forever be acknowledged that these governments were contrived merely by the use of reason and the senses.” -- John Adams, "A Defense of the Constitutions of Government of the United States of America" (1787-88),

“I almost shudder at the thought of alluding to the most fatal example of the abuses of grief which the history of mankind has preserved -- the Cross. Consider what calamities that engine of grief has produced!”-- John Adams, letter to Thomas Jefferson

“What is it the New Testament teaches us? To believe that the Almighty committed debauchery with a woman engaged to be married; and the belief of this debauchery is called faith.”-- Thomas Paine, The Age of Reason, 1794

I received the automated “thanks for your email” reply. I don’t expect anything more. After all, a genuine response would require intelligence, introspection, and intellectual honesty... qualities that Perry won’t even pray for.

And now for a message from our sponsors- Reason and Sanity

2011-09-10T14:08:00.005-04:00

My politics are no secret; I’m a fiscal semi-conservative and a social liberal. I simply refer to myself as a Moderate when pressed for a political label. But whether you are a conservative, moderate or liberal - by virtue of your being a reader of my blog you clearly have a dedication to reality and sanity. You respect reason and science. You support a secular government. You despise politicians who promote religiosity, try to sneak it into government and our schools, or use it to ingratiate themselves to the voting religionist public. If my assessment of my readership is accurate this article should enrage you.

During this past week's GOP debate two things stood out that sent shivers up my spine, made my skin crawl, and for an instant made me ashamed to be an American. One was uttered by the GOP front runner, the other was an outburst of enthusiasm by the venue’s audience. I’m not the first to write on this issue, but I want to offer my perspective and record it for posterity or at least so I’ll remember it for as long as I still have a memory.

Rick Perry attempted to justify his rejection of the scientific evidence for man made global warming by implying that scientists can be and have been wrong before. In his bumbling attempt to find support for his denial of scientific reality he made this absurd statement: “Galileo got outvoted for a spell." WTF??!

It took a few seconds for that to register with me since it made zero sense. Galileo got outvoted? By whom, and over what? Galileo supported the solar centric versus the Church endorsed Earth centric model of the universe. What peer review group of scientists “outvoted” him? Was he ultimately proven wrong? WTF was Perry saying?

What Perry was saying was pure and blatant idiocy. Or, if you are more generous, he is a pathetic whore playing to the dumbest of the religious zombies that he depends on for support. So dumb that likely many of them still believe in an Earth-centric model of our solar system. But no matter what spin anyone puts on it this was the statement of a living breathing jerk.

Galileo wasn’t outvoted /overruled as a result of his theory being subjected to peer review and found lacking by qualified astronomer scientists of his day. Galileo was silenced, a victim of the Church’s Inquisition! The Church forbade Galileo to promote the heresy of truth; threatened him; and put him under house arrest until he recanted the truth of his statement. How does the exercise of unlimited power by the Church to suppress reality and truth because it disagreed with their fable and lies, in anyway equate to being “outvoted” and more importantly how does it relate to the global warming issue? It doesn't, except ironically Perry would likely be delighted to play Grand Inquisitor to the 98% of the climate scientists whose science he rejects.

I’m hoping Perry was too stupid to realize what he said made no sense. To do otherwise would be to accept an even scarier alternative: that Perry was tipping his hat to his fundamentalist evangelical base by implying that the power of religious belief super cedes scientific evidence. What is that superstitious belief? That God would never permit man to destroy his Creation; that only God holds the power to destroy the planet and will do so in accordance with His timetable - thus the science of man-made global warming is a fraud, a long held fundamentalist position.

I hope it was his stupidity. I want it to be his stupidity. The implications of it being the latter alternative are so horrific, so insidious, so foreboding in terms of what a religiously guided government would be that it boggles the mind, or should, of any freethinking American and respecter of reason. But I dare not dismiss the possibility. It is entirely plausible given Perry’s history of combining religious fanaticism, feigned or real, with governance.

Then came the most telling and horrific event of the evening. The moderator brought up the hundreds of executions that Texas has carried out under Perry’s administration, more executions than under any other governor, in any state in the nation’s history. At the mention of this fact some significant portion of the republican/tea party/ Christian audience erupted into applause. APPLAUSE!

At first I thought I missed something. Maybe there was a delayed response to a prior comment from a candidate. But alas, this was not the case. These people were applauding the over 230 executions carried out under Perry’s term of office. They were gleeful, proud, and exuberant over the size and scope of unbridled state sponsored killing. They were being Christian.

My mind immediately formed the image of filthy, stinking, jeering crowds of peasant Christians reveling at the writhing bodies of heretics as they are burned at the stake during the Inquisition; or gleeful at the screams of incinerated “witches” during the 17th century. Of Muslim extremists stoning women to death, or loping off heads as crowds laughed and goaded and cursed the condemned.

I looked at Perry during this unholy display. He did not look distraught, or disapproving, or in any way phased by his supporters’ outburst - emotions /reactions that a better man, even a death penalty supporter, might have elicited simply as a respecter of human life. No, nothing. Religionists love executions, they always have; and the more religious/ Christian they are the more they love them. So, what’s to be ashamed of? Where’s the contradiction?

I support capital punishment for certain cases. I’m not proud of it; I just see it as a necessary response to certain crimes under certain circumstances. But for a fleeting moment I felt dirty and ashamed. Americans don’t revel in execution rates, at least not in the America I thought I knew. They do in Rick Perry’s America.

I don’t want this to become a Rick Perry America. If you do, if you don’t share my disgust and revulsion at what he represents and what it would mean to the “Wall of Separation,” civility and our liberties; if you'd cast your vote for him for pocket book reasons, then the unsubscribe button is only a few inches from your finger tips. Do it now.

Religionists spit on the Founders' vision!

2011-09-06T14:56:00.005-04:00

Few things irritate me more than revisionist history. Whether intentional to support an agenda with pseudo-fact, or out of ignorance of true history, I wish it were a crime to promote and quote untruths about the documented past. If I had my way perpetrators would be punished by being forced to actually read an accredited / genuine history book, while having a Fleet enema administered hourly until they are able to recite real history untainted by religiously inspired right-wing bullshit..

I won’t bore you with the details. Let it be simply said that I have once again had my sensibilities assaulted by another of those religionist’s “Our Christian Founders’ vision for America...” inventions of historical “fact” by proffering why our Founders wanted In God We Trust as our nation’s motto. I will tell you that I went apoplectic. Had the offending tea bagging right wing religious buffoon been in my presence I would have administered the enema cranially and the history book anally.

In 1782 the US Congress adopted a motto which represented the vision of the Founders as they sought to unite a multifaceted confederation into a united entity. Irrespective of the colonies’ social, cultural, political, philosophical, religious, or economic differences the great objective was to bring them together to form a strong union, a single nation. That motto, part of the Great Seal of the United States, was E Pluribus Unum (Out of Many, One).

The motto also reflected what would become America’s heterogenic make up. Unique among nations, America became a nation of immigrants who came seeking the freedom and opportunity that eluded them in their respective homelands. And out of those “many” peoples rose “one” nation, the great melting pot, where irrespective of ones heritage, each was every bit as much as an American as his neighbor. This is what America came to represent to the world. For one-hundred and seventy-five years the motto came to exemplify this unique experiment in equality - “oneness from many.”

Then 1956, and Senator Joe McCarthy’s congressional inquisition. Designed to ferret out the “creeping Red threat”, the insidious take over of our nation by the godless commies who were in our midst working to destroy us and suck dry our vital bodily fluids (a Dr. Strangelove reference there), black lists, people losing their jobs, threats of reprisal for failure to name names, people living in fear of being called a Communist sympathizer. Perhaps one of the darkest eras in our nation’s history - hysteria ruled.

From this madness arose a streak of genius: change our nation’s motto from E Pluribus Unum to “In God we Trust,” in order to stop those commie bastards from ..uh...from something. So by act of congress In God we Trust supplanted E Pluribus Unum on our paper currency, and became the official motto of the United States. And a damn good thing too since even though McCarthy was eventually dethroned and dismissed as a demagogue who exemplified the excesses of single minded non-think, Communism never took root and the nation was saved from Joe Stalin’s tyranny- thanks, no doubt, to the new motto.

So now our historic roots of coming from many factions and joining as one; our mantle of acceptance of the many who seek to become as one with their adopted nation; our uniqueness as a melting pot is no longer exemplified by E Pluribus Unum. Instead, we have a motto that emulates theocratic mindless reverence for an imaginary being.

Instead of pride in our nation’s formation and celebrating a society that embraces our many heritages, our motto echos the empty minds of the lowest common denominator. What the heck does the motto even mean? Does it imply that as Americans we all believe in a singular supernatural entity that is entrusted to manage the nation’s affairs? If so, what need is there for elected officials, for a Defense Department, for a Department of anything?

In the least it makes the assumption that all citizens are alike in belief, dismissing the fact there are non-believers and believers in multiple pagan gods. It places no value on reason or reality, nor does it honor the “Great Experiment” , the first example of democracy and freedom upon which all other democratic nations will base their own. It flies in the face of the Founding Father’s use of the deistic term “Creator” and their specific avoidance of the word “God” with all its Judeo-Xtian connotations and baggage.

It puts our motto right up there with The Confederate States of America’s motto, Under God, Our Vindicator; and third world nation’s mottos like Iraq’s God is the Greatest; Nicaragua’s, In God we Trust (Yep, that’s right); and Saudi Arabia’s, There is no God other than God and Muhammad is His Prophet. Yes, our motto puts us in wonderful company of similarly deluded nations.

Perhaps the motto change and the addition of “under God” in the pledge (also a by product of the McCarthy era - sixty years after the pledge was written), were the early warning signs of our nation’s abandonment of reason, and slide into third worldism. Maybe it was fate’s way of saying: “Someday this great country will come to admire ignorance, praise superstition, deny and demonize science, and seek the leadership and guidance of those who pray to a boogie man for rain and for people’s sexuality to be changed.”

I’m guessing Adams, Jefferson, Paine, et al, never saw this coming. For their sake, I’m glad they didn’t live to see it.

Reflections on The South.

2011-09-01T10:52:00.002-04:00

Disclaimer: With this article I risk offending some of my readers, indeed some of my closest internet friends. That is the furthest thing from my intent. I love my Southern freethinking friends and relatives. I have all the respect for their ability to tolerate the South’s least attractive traits and retain their freethinking sanity.

The condemnation of their home state / region is not directed at them nor meant to insult them or anyone who has risen above the ignorance and backwardness that The South has come to exemplify, endorse and propagate. That said....

I’ve pussy footed around it in a number of my blog rants and in my books, but I’m putting it out on the table openly, plainly and unabashedly: I despise The South. There, I said it. [Pause, wait for audience to finish gasping in horror]

The fact is that I’ve pretty much always harbored a dislike for The South, or at least for as long as I could read or interpret TV news broadcasts. Racism; anti-Semitism; anti-homosexual activism; a general lack of respect for advanced education; the highest rates of all the social ills known to our nation; a peculiar penchant for executions; a glorification of violence; a distinct taste for re-writing history; and the breeding ground for the most Religiously afflicted people in the nation, if not the entire civilized world... all of it festers and thrives among the twelve to sixteen states (depending on whose counting) known as The South.

My opinion of The South was not a sudden revelation. It was formed over the years starting in childhood when I read Uncle Tom’s Cabin. Then Mark Twain. Then
“Inherit the Wind.”

It began to solidify when I saw the “Whites Only” seating, restaurant and rest room designations when I traveled with a tour group in my early teens. Then watching the epithet spewing/ spittle lathered grimacing faces of enraged Southern whites on TV news broadcasts during integration of Southern schools in the 60’s. Then there were the lynchings, shooting and night time terror perpetrated on the civil rights workers, the Freedom Riders. My experiences with red neck drill instructors in Fort Jackson and Fort Polk during my army service didn’t improve my perception, and the assassination of MLK pretty much slammed the door on any respect or empathy for Southern anything. I even harbor an intense disgust for Kentucky Fried Chicken that foul grease congealed crap that passes for fowl.

In this month’s issue of Church & State, the magazine published by Americans United for the Separation of Church and State, 75%+ of the domestic stories are related to battles against Southern states’ religious intrusions into government, schools, and our lives. Texas, Florida, North Carolina, Delaware top the list... multiple times. This is the norm.

The birthplace of the KKK and other uniquely Southern hate groups; the cry of “the South will rise again” and associated reverence for a defunct flag/symbol which glorifies a culture that embraced slavery and fought our history’s most horrific war to retain it; the reticence of state and local governments to abide by the Constitution and decision of the Supreme Court vis-à-vis separating government and religion; the rejection of reason and reality by an overwhelming majority of the citizenry who prefer to embrace the religious delusion heaped on them by backwards preachers and preachers of questionable sanity and even more dubious ethics i.e. the Falwells, Robertsons, Swaggerts, Bakkers, Grahams, John Benefiel (look him up- it’ll creep you out); the stomping grounds of a populace with a greater knowledge of their local high school football players’ stats than who the secretary of state is, or the name of a single supreme court justice, or what the Establishment Clause of the 1st amendment means. All of this is just the icing on the cake of utter contempt I hold for “Dixie.”

Some will protest and say:
“But Hump, this is stereotyping. Certainly you realize these things aren’t confined to The South. Just look at Sarah Palin, Michele Bachmann, Rick Santorum, or the Fundamentalist Mormons of Utah and the South West. Craziness, bigotry and blatant stupidity can be found everywhere.” and they’d be right. But stereotypes very often have a basis in reality, and the reality I point to is undeniable. And while racism, homophobia, Christian fundamentalist idiocy, right wing violence endorsing wackiness, gross stupidity, et al, can be and is found everywhere in the US, the highest concentration, the epicenter, the Mecca, the hub, the core, the focal point resides in the region south of the Mason Dixon Line.

Proof? I’ve often sited the Pew Survey on Religiosity from 2008, as well as the statistics available by state on unemployment rates, poverty, infant mortality, education levels, illiteracy, violent crime rates, alcoholism, teen pregnancy and even estimated aggregate IQ. Invariably, The South rates highest among the negative attributes, and lowest among the positive ones. Not surprisingly, the degree of their societal ills is largely in direct correlation to their respective levels of religiosity. It confirms everything I perceived to be true anecdotally.

Want to see Xtian Snake Handlers, or the largest number of faith healers? Go South young man.

Wonder which region represents 30% of the nation’s states but has more than half of the creationist museums and theme parks in the nation; and which state gave a $46 million tax break to the builders of a religious theme park?

Curious as to which region of the nation most often starts their legislative sessions with specifically Christian oriented prayers invoking Jesus’ name?

Wonder which states' governors have appealed to their constituents to pray for rain or for economic recovery in the past six months?

Wonder what region can claim nine of the top ten execution states?

Wonder in which state an incoming governor during his inauguration said that unless his constituents were Christians they were not his brothers or sisters?

Curious as to what state claims the only sitting governor who actually participated in an exorcism of his fiancée?

Wonder no more. The South gets all the credit.

I am convinced that if The South left the Union and joined Mexico, the aggregate IQ of the remaining United States would increase by 20 points, and the average IQ of Mexico would drop similarly. This presupposes that the Southern freethinker minority immigrates north.

There are fine and intelligent people who reside in The South. My Southern readers and Facebook friends are proof of that. I think of them as islands of intelligence and reason in a raging sea of ignorant delusional dullards.

Of course, The South isn’t all bad. On the positive side there is the heat, drought, and gawd awful humidity; the long neck beer swilling-giant belt buckle wearing-Confederate flag adorned pickup truck driving red necks; the profusion of Waffle Houses; George Bush Jr. and Senior; and that kid who dangles his feet off the bridge while playing the banjo in “Deliverance.”

Yes, much like snowballs in Hell, even The South has its redeeming qualities.

The Wrath of GOD is Coming! So what’s all the excitement about?

2011-08-25T19:12:00.003-04:00

As I type this I’m listening to the TV reports on hurricane Irene. Still many hundreds of miles away from NH it is nevertheless creating much consternation here in the North East. The track of the storm is now projected to pass immediately over our tipi.

Touted as perhaps the most dangerous hurricane on the east coast in the past seventy years, the news reports are filled with advice on how to prepare. Home Depot has already run out of generators in many areas. Plywood is at a premium in the South. The supermarkets have reported heavier than normal volume in the Carolinas. People are evacuating the outer banks and heading for high ground to escape the storm surge.

But with all this preparation, all this hand wringing, all the activity my only question is ... why?

Those claiming to be US Christians represent 76% of our country’s population. The majority of those Christians believe that their god created the planet, all its inhabitants, all the mountains, everything in the universe...Bam! ...created. This would also mean their god gets credit for creating weather, and according to Bill O’Reilly, the tides. God doesn’t screw up, he’s perfect. He has a purpose and a plan for everything and everyone, as any true Christian will tell you. So WTF is all this preparation all about?

In the early 1700’s a Middle Eastern visitor to London walked through a typical London rain shower carrying a previously unknown implement ...the umbrella. The residents, good Christians that they were, hurled insults, rocks and mud at the dry fellow. Their logic was pure and simple: if God maketh the rain to fall upon plants, animals and humans alike how dare a man challenge God and his well devised plan?

You have to respect that kind of religious think. Oh, not for the obvious idiocy, but for the consistency of illogic that it represents. No back sliding Christians there, no siree. (One has to wonder how they justified hats and roofs).

Their position was representative of a true belief in and respect for God’s Creation and His plan. Yet today nary a Christian can be found on the entire East Coast who is refusing a rain poncho, hasn’t laid in supplies of chips and beer, hasn’t topped off their generator, hasn’t boarded up their windows or hauled their boat out of the marina. Not one has failed to throw an extra tarp over their hovel, or jack up their double-wide above the high water mark. Oh they of little faith.

Pat Robertson knows that hurricanes are part of God’s plan. He credits God with using them to kill homo tolerating heathens en masse, and with a vengeance. If a good Christian opposes gay marriage and gasps at the sight of two women holding hands, what do they have to be “afeared” of?

This frenzied preparation on the part of the faithful shows a complete lack of respect for God’s omni-benevolence. A dissing of God’s intended plan. A blatant lack of faith in the Baby Jesus’ love. If they were TRUE Christians they would just sit back and watch the destruction confident and safe in the knowledge that God’s wrath will be appropriately directed. And if by chance they and their family are killed by a stray wind blown 2x4, or drown in a storm surge it’s all good...it’s all God’s plan. After all, God does NOT fuck up.

Fear

2011-08-19T16:04:00.003-04:00

I have known fear.

I’m not just talking about the fear one has of snakes, or when spooked by a prankster in a Halloween mask, or the fear that releases a quart of adrenalin into your blood stream following a near miss head on collision. I’m talking about the unrelenting all encompassing fear that stays with you, unabated; a fear that life as you know it can / might / will change for the worse and there isn’t a whole lot you can do about it.

I experienced that kind of fear almost every day and night for a year when I was in Vietnam. I felt that fear when I was diagnosed with cancer. I felt it when we thought our hospitalized eldest son was going to die, and when my wife had an embolism. Fortunately all of those events turned out for the best.

Mrs. Hump tells me that I am a worry junkie - that worrying for me is like the pleasure one gets after they’ve been banging their head against a concrete wall for an hour ...it feels so good when you stop. But, the fact is what I’m feeling right now goes much deeper than simple worry.

This morning’s poll results show Obama with a 26% approval rating, his lowest since his election. Fact is that even though I voted for him, and will again baring some unforeseeable sea change, I’m not terribly impressed with Obama’s performance myself. He has fallen way short of his pre-election rhetoric on a variety of issues. If polled I’m not sure I could give him my unqualified seal of approval either.

The darlings of the Teabaggers - Michele (“subservient to my husband/God speaks to me”) Bachmann, and Rick (“get down on your knees and pray to Jesus/ I was called by God to run”) Perry are now among the front runners in the race for the Republican presidential nomination. Normally I’d shrug it off and say “typical GOP morons.” But this is different.

American’s are by and large stupid. Evidence for this abounds. :

The percentage of Americans who reject evolutionary theory is 59%, the highest percentage of evolution deniers among all 30+ Western nations except Turkey.

We have among the highest percentage of superstionalists of all the Western nations except Italy and Greece, with 65% saying religion is important to their daily lives.

The math and science test performance of US high school students versus other industrialized nations is abysmal with our high school graduates ranking 16th in science, 19th in math, out of 21 industrialized nations.

The willingness of so many Americans to equate degree of religiosity to patriotism and denial of the Wall of Separation admonishment of our founding fathers.

Taken as a whole its clear we are not a nation of “rocket surgeons.”

Combine that with a weak economy, high unemployment, growing national debt, and financial uncertainty among a populace that is largely accepting of intermingling religion with government in spite of the constitutional prohibition against it, and the mood of the mindless seems to be congealing into something resembling The Blob on steroids.

It’s the thing bad choices are made of. Choices that could have far reaching and long term implications for the nation - for proponents of a secular government; for proponents of real science in our school rooms; for proponents of equality regardless of ones sexual orientation; for proponents of merciful, dignified, civilized treatment of our least able citizens; for proponents of a woman’s right to retain control over her uterus; for proponents of war only as a last resort; for proponents of a nation of the People not of the Corporation.

I have known real fear. I’m scared now.

Next time I’ll just say “GOD, NO!”

2011-08-14T14:50:00.005-04:00

I don’t often do book reviews on my blog. I’ll leave reviews on amazon , but my blog is largely dedicated to ... well, lets face it... me and my perspectives on things religious.

But when the publisher Simon & Schuster asked me to accept a free copy of a famous personage’s latest tome, someone I respect and whose views I share and humor I appreciate; and asks me to post a review on my blog ...well, convention gets pushed aside. It’s Penn Jillette from the Penn & Teller team! Penn, from the TV show “Bullshit!”. PENN, atheist and comedian and magician par excellence! Fucking A I’ll review it!

Now, see that word above ... “fucking”? This paragraph will contain the last use of that word in this blog post. I have no problem with the word fuck; it has its varied and legitimate uses. It’s a great word. But after reading the word fuck some four- hundred times over 230 pages (that’s 1.7 “fucks” per page) one becomes aware of its overuse. Fifty fucks is shock value. One-hundred fucks are fun and games. Four-hundred fucks is overkill. If one can’t dredge up enough wit without “fuck” dependency ... well, there’s a fucking problem

If that was the only problem with Penn Jillette’s "God, No! Signs you may already be an atheist, and other magical tales” I’d give it five stars. Unfortunately it goes much deeper than that.

The first forty to fifty pages are absolute genius. I found myself nodding in agreement with Penn’s disdain for agnostics, a point of view I have voiced here and in my books. I loved what he had to say about Christians who call atheists “know it alls who have all the answers” when in fact we are the first to say “I don’t know”, while religionists claim knowledge of the “absolute truth” without an iota of evidence. I laughed so hard reading about the antics of Extreme Elvis and the atheist conversion of Hassidim that I couldn’t read through the tears and actually had to put down the book lest I pass out from lack of oxygen.

But unexpectedly, like getting hit in the face with a brick filled pie, his on point and amusing commentary on atheism, religion, the foolishness of belief, and rejection of reality faded away. Without warning the tales descended into something less than magical. What followed were rambling, hideously detailed accounts of Jillette’s personal experiences and sexual exploits that have no detectable connection to the theme implied by the book’s title and promised by the opening chapters. Let me highlight a few of the most memorably forgettable chapters:

His naked weightless frolicing and vomit filled ride on a zero gravity airplane.

His naked field trip to a gay bath house in the 80’s.

His ruminating over his departed older sister whose most admirable quality was that she stated she’d sacrifice the lives of millions of innocents at the hands of an atomic bomb terrorist, rather than turn him in if the terrorist in question was her brother Penn.

His admiration for aged porn star Ron Jeremy’s genitalia and ability to perform fellatio on himself.

His love of strip clubs and lap dances and the importance of never denigrating an unattractive stripper.

His wager that he could have intercourse with a gorgeous large-breasted model while scuba diving which culminated in his masturbating in the ocean, providing a protein snack for the native fish. [Note: all of his many sexual exploits are with gorgeous large breasted women].

His obsessions with (A) nakedness (his own), (B) masturbation/ejaculation, and admiration for (C) surgically enhanced breasts, and (D) penises (mostly his own).

I didn’t count the number of references to those last four topics but if I were a betting man, and I am, I’d say one-hundred-fifty references would be a conservative estimate. (Note: that would be 0.65 exhibitionist, sex/masturbation, tits, and penis/cock reference on every page).

I’m as far from being a prude as one can be. I can appreciate ribald stories. I have been called a dirty old man since I was fifteen. But I kept looking for some meaning, some tie back to the primary topic, some redeeming quality and justification. I came up empty. Oh, for sure there were subsequent if somewhat forced stabs at bringing the atheism theme back into the forefront. But it seemed like an after thought given that the bulk of the book was devoted to the shenanigans of an aging, sex obsessed, self-indulgent, and eternal high school sophomore. I wanted desperately to like this book, because I love Penn Jillette. I suppose if I were a teenaged pimple faced kid I’d find it very cool. Instead, I found it a massive disappointment and inexplicably depressing.

Nevertheless, "God , No!" will likely be a big seller among hardcore admirers of Penn who will masturbate under the covers with a flashlight as they live vicariously through the imagery of Penn inserting his finger into a gorgeous model’s anus. He’ll make a ton of money from them, and from the betrayed unsuspecting fan who was seeking Penn’s insights on the religious culture war. I wish him well with that.

By the way, if the back cover blurb attributed to Richard Dawkins (Penn claims him as a friend) was actually written by Dawkins, he should be ashamed of himself. If it was written for Dawkins by a press agent that he shares with Jillette, he should sue the pants off the fu ... uh ... clown.

Christianity and Medical Progress: This will kill you....literally!

2011-08-10T21:30:00.003-04:00

I have not read Beyond Belief: Two thousand years of bad faith in the Christian Church by James McDonald, but I have read excerpts; specifically the chapter that speaks to the history of religious obstructionism to advances in medical science. http://www.badnewsaboutchristianity.com/gg0_medicine.htm

In the first century AD, Greek physician Celsus was performing cataract operations. He understood the relationship between good hygiene and illness prevention. Amazing advances in medicine continued through the 2nd century AD. But then, with the death of the period’s most famous physician Galen of Pergamum, things screeched to a halt. His writings on medical procedures, anatomy, diagnostics, etc., were lost, likely the victim of Christian destruction.

From 300 AD to almost the end of the 17th century advances in medicine were slowed to a crawl. In the Middle Ages medicine actually regressed. Science and study was replaced with superstitious Christian concepts drawn from Biblical inerrancy which credited all cures to God’s hand just as all illness was a punishment of God; or the work of Satan; of demonic possession, etc. God was credited with curing of illness. If one lived or died it was by the hand of God, it was God’s will. Of course, prayer and penance could influence God’s decision as to the out come. A prayer to one’s patron saint could help too.

To propose man’s intervention, to attempt to alter the course of illness or improve ones chances of survival by actual medical application would be an affront to God; a challenge to God’s divine wisdom and plan. It was heresy.

People died young, and unnecessarily. Suffering prior to death was seen as a penance. Surgery was largely limited to bleedings, or tooth extractions by church edict. Dissections in universities were tolerated, but no research could be done. It was ostensibly an anatomy exercise, repeated without questioning or investigation or experimentation. The following is from McDonald’s book:

“A Greek thinker, Alcmaeon of Crotona, had identified the brain as the central organ in the higher activities of humankind around 500 BC, but 2,000 years later Christian authorities were teaching that the brain was merely a phlegm-secreting gland.”

And so it was when western civilization was ruled by The Church. As its grip was slowly loosened the re-birth of research, discovery, experimentation and the practice of real medicine had its resurgence. The discoveries of Celsus, 1400 years prior, began to be reintroduced in the 16th century even while the church retained authority over who could practice medicine and exactly how much latitude the physician had. Still, exorcisms, torture, mortification of the flesh was the Church’s preferred method to expel illness.

The Church’s obstruction of medical science even extended to their condemnation of small pox inoculations as late as the 19th century.

It continues today - constantly obstructing the health and wellbeing of those it claims to love and care so much about. In matters of reproduction, contraception, AIDS prevention it has a death grip on the minds of its most gullible and susceptible followers. Heart transplants are opposed by some Christian sects since it is considered the repository of the soul. Blood transfusions are forbidden by other sects. Medical care entirely rejected by others in favor of faith healing and prayer. The life of an adult woman is seen as secondary to the life of a deformed and near death infant. Stem cell research, which holds perhaps the most promising advancements to human longevity and quality of life in medical history is roundly opposed, and stringently limited because of Christian objection to the harvesting of stem cells from discarded fetuses.

Yet you will hear Catholics touting their religion’s contribution to education, proclaiming Catholicism the seed of the university system. You’ll hear them extol the discoveries of Gregor Mendel, or point to Dr. Christian Barnard’s religious roots as they stake their claim to the title of “enlightened.”

But then, why should they care about the deaths of millions brought about by religious brain washing and denial of reality? Why should Christianity want to see lives made longer on this planet when the promise of an imaginary paradise offers true relief from ones ailments? Why should the relief of life long pain and the ravages of disease be sought when pain is seen as sharing the suffering of Jesus, and disease part of God’s plan? Yet strangely, Popes, and Bishops, Cardinals and Monsignors will spare no expense on medical science advancements to keep their decrepit bodies, atrophied minds and useless existence in tact.

One can only imagine where medical science would be today had not Christianity impeded its progress and cursed mankind with its arrogance and devotion to superstitious stupidity. A pox on them.

Corrupt or Religiously Stupid?: NH Politician introduces bill to teach Creationism in science class

2011-08-05T14:07:00.012-04:00

I have often touted New Hampshire’s status as the least religious state in the nation (tied with Vermont), where people’s religious perspectives, or lack of them, are usually kept to themselves and not shoved down peoples’ throats. I still maintain that I am largely accurate in that representation. But there are exceptions to every rule.

Gary Hopper, NH state representative for the 7th District mercifully does not represent my town in the NH legislature. His bio says he is a 2nd term Republican, is a machinist by trade, and has a High School diploma.

Gary is also a "Conservative Christian" who believes in the Judeo-Christian Creation myth, rejecting evolutionary theory as “just a theory” with a lot of problems. Not the least of which is that kids are taught that the origin of life is an accident, and thus has no purpose. The inference being that the kids will feel they have no purpose.

Gary doesn’t know that Darwin’s theory of evolution does not speak with authority on the origin of life on the planet, only the development of species through natural selection after life began. But hey, to Gary that’s just details. Rep. Gary Hopper is an asshat.

When I heard that Rep. Hopper is supporting legislation to make Creationism part of NH schools’ science curriculum I wrote him a very brief note:

Gary,
You're an imbecile and embarrassment to NH.
I wish you represented my district so I could expose your religious infirmity and gross stupidity to your constituency and vote you out. Albeit, I think you already did the former.
Sincerely,
Bart Centre

Not very tactful, but I’m not known for tact. I received the following reply:

Hi Mr. Centre,
You may be able to explain something to me. For a very long time I have wondered why do Atheist [sic] become so enraged at the mention of God?

I don't believe in Santa Claus but I am not angered by people who are [sic]. If you believe I am just ignorant what harm does that do to you and how can you detest something that doesn't exist?

Rep Hopper

Once again the obvious eludes the vapid mind of the religionist. It falls to me to educate him:

Gary,

You are (no surprise here) confused. Atheists don't get angry at the mention of god/s. Nor do we detest god/s any more than we detest Moby Dick, or Darth Vader. It would be foolish to detest a fictional character.

You can mention your imaginary friend in church, at home, in the street, in your car, in your favorite restaurant, bar, Public Park, street corner, or anywhere you like. What atheists resent are people in positions of responsibility using their belief in an imaginary being [and fables] to dumb down education, further setting US students behind the industrialized nations in science; or to forestall scientific advancement that can better peoples lives and longevity; or impinge on the wall of separation; or to promote their religious symbols on government property; or to meddle in peoples sexual activity or truncate peoples' rights and freedoms and happiness by opposing homosexual marriage, or a woman's right to chose - because it offends their so called sky daddy.

We despise those religionists who do not know history and/or who seek to re-write history by implying this is a "Christian Nation", or that our Founding Fathers wanted it to be.

But I imagine this is all lost on you. I sincerely doubt you have the mental acuity to process this. Perhaps the only way you could understand it is if another representative proposed that the Hindu Creation story be taught in science classes; or the Mayan creation story; or if a Satan worshipper petitioned to say an opening prayer at the next legislative session. Then perhaps you'd understand. No doubt you'd go ballistic. That's called Christian Hypocrisy.

Now, be sure to put this on your fb page [as claimed to have been done with my earlier letter]. Maybe it will make sense to those who visit your page but still have a modicum of intellectual honesty, respect for reality, and understanding that Creationism is religion not science.

Yours in reason,
Bart Centre

Fact is I was almost convinced that this buffoon was getting money from the Religious Right to promote this absurd creationism bill, and he may well be. But, it wasn’t until reading his bio that I discovered I was dealing with someone who has a marginal education; who had never taken a course in reasoning, logic, ethics, comparative religions, or philosophy, much less advanced biology.

It’s entirely possible I misjudged his dishonesty and that he is in fact a simple minded superstitionalist with limited intellect who is not satisfied encumbering his own children with mindless fable in place of science, but feels compelled to do the same to all of NH’s children.

I’m not sure if I prefer a corrupt politician to a moronic one, the effect is often the same. I’ll ponder it further.

Buffalo Burgers, Believers, and Bibles: The Hump attends a Xtian BBQ

2011-08-01T18:09:00.004-04:00

I love buffalo. I eat it at least once a week. I buy it from an elderly gentleman in the next town who has a few hundred acres of property that has been in his family since the 1800s. He taps maple trees for syrup and maple candy, and keeps about fifty head of buffalo.

On my last shopping visit to his place I was informally invited to a barbeque the following Saturday from 11:00 a.m. to 3:00 p.m. Not one to pass up a free buffalo burger I was in. As I was leaving with my six pounds of buffalo burger patties he admonished me to get there early “The benediction will be given by a State Police Trooper at 11:00, you won’t want to miss that.”

Benediction?

I know the old fellow is a believer and active in his church. He knows I’m an atheist. He knows that I know that the place will likely be overrun by his fellow church goers. I know that he knows that I know that this is not a problem for me as am not about to let a flock of superstitionalists spoil my appetite for free buffalo burger.

Mrs. Hump and I arrived right on time last Saturday ... 12 noon ... expecting to have safely dodged the Trooper’s prayer and the associated baaing of the sheep. No such luck. Evidently things got off to a slow start (or did he hold up the religious mumbo jumbo in anticipation of my heathen arrival?). As we came up the private road we could see the Trooper, in full uniform, with a microphone before the assembled bible bangers all with heads down, and hands folded in prayer.

Since their attention was occupied and eyes diverted I was able to quietly slip the Pathfinder in behind the Trooper’s cruiser on the side of the road unnoticed. And there we waited - inconspicuously, windows up, AC on - for the ritual to subside. I had hoped to see some hand-waving, or flopping around in the dirt or talking in tongues. But no, this is NH. Our religiously afflicted are classier than that. About all that stood out and seemed to separate them from “normal” non-church going folk was the glazed look on their faces and a submissive demeanor about them that testified to ... I don’t know what ... perhaps the fatalism that comes from turning responsiblity for your life over to an imaginary friend. Or maybe an attrophied mind.

In short order it was over. I was musing over whether the Trooper was holding a prayer meeting while on duty, my tax dollars supporting his religious moonlighting when Mrs. Hump poked me and we unassed the vehicle. She had brought some cake and added to the abundant food buffet. After congratulating our host on his 80th birthday we wandered over to the only other people we knew, a husband and wife pastor couple from our town. The husband is a pastor of a United Church of Christ and is a pretty normal guy. The UCC in New England is about as close to being agnostic as a Christian church can be. I call it the “the religionist’s waiting room pending acceptance of reason.” We exchanged niceties, talked about the effect the failed May 21st rapture prophesy had on my business and book sales; then the scent of charcoal broiled buffalo grabbed my senses and I drifted off to the food line.

I noticed there was a donation box for the church at the head of the line, along with a guest sign in book to wish our host a happy 80th. A skinny guy with the even skinner wife in front of me dropped in a $20. Dilemma ... do I really need to support a church, or is this expected as part of the feeding? Figuring my contribution wouldn’t affect the state of religious affairs of the universe too dramatically, I reached for my wallet. A $20, two $10s, and three singles were my complete bankroll. I did a quick calculation buffalo burger = $7.50 lb at retail. One burger = ¼ lb. Two burgers = ½ lb = $3.75.

I figured the cake we brought more than off set the value of the coleslaw, baked beans, and potato salad we’d glom up. And my host didn’t pay retail for his own burgers. I gingerly placed the three singles into the box, deftly covering them with the Skinny Guy’s $20.

“I know Elmer from church, I play the organ there.” Skinny Guy volunteered. “I know Elmer from his buffalo burgers; I buy a lot of them.” I countered. As I reached for the paper plate, plastic fork, and napkins I saw him eyeing me suspiciously (or so I thought, maybe it was just my imagination). “I’ve never seen you at church. Which church do you attend?”

I could feel the synapses in my brain firing at warp speed. Immediately all manner of potential responses filled my head. “None, you religious sheep.” was one. “Do I look like one of your Children of the Corn?” was another. “They don’t let the Anti-Christ sing in the choir.” was on the tip of my tongue. But I suppressed them all. “I don’t attend any church.” was the simplest and least offensive reply figuring that would end that. I was wrong.

“We’d be happy to have you in our congregation.” he smiled. I smiled back: “Well, actually I’m an atheist and anti-theist, so I don’t think your fellow congregants would share your happiness.” Skinny Guy looked a little skinnier and paler than he did before he plopped that burger onto his bun. “Oh, uh, you’re him ... I mean ... you're the author and pet rescuer.” he fumbled for words. “That would be my claim to fame, yes... I’m him.” I said unabashedly, amazed that my reputation preceded me. Elmer must have let the beans out.

There was no further conversation between us as we moved through the feeding line. His wife looked a little shaky in the knees. I guess that’s what comes of imagining you’re attending a barbeque with Satan’s minion and being so skinny. My wife looked a little perturbed with me; clearly she was not as happy with my selected response as was I, feeling it could have been more subtle. I don’t do subtle.

We didn’t stay too long. After eating we walked around, looked at the baby buffalos grazing in the pasture, petted a couple of dwarf donkeys, and said hi to the host’s pet emu. We left as inconspicuously as we had arrived.

I don’t know if my invitation is owed to my being a good customer and acquaintance of the birthday boy, or my quasi-celebrity as the open atheist, or if I was a target of a weak proselytizing attempt. I do know that the burgers were great, the baked beans awesome. I hope Elmer holds another bash for his 90th. I’ll still be a buffalo burger aficionado...and the only atheist there.

The Air Force invokes God...and I think I agree.

2011-07-29T18:36:00.001-04:00

A Facebook friend posted an article from the Center for Inquiry to my fb page. It seems the Air Force has included a discussion of religious/biblical justification for nuclear war as part of the training for those charged with launching nuclear missiles. Here is the short article, worth a two minute read: http://www.centerforinquiry.net/news/cfi_condemns_use_of_religious_materials_for_instruction_in_nuclear_war_ethi

I am ambivalent. Not sure where I land on this. My instincts tell me that with the hyper-religiosity inherent in the Air Force Academy (a major issue with the Military Religious Freedom Foundation) and throughout the military services that this is another proselytizing attempt at worst, or the unnecessary invoking of Judeo-Christian doctrine at best.

But on the other hand there is a reality that must be confronted. A vast portion of the military is in fact Christian. They were before they entered the military, and carry that affliction around with them on active duty. In the unique position these nuclear missile specialists are in, they would be faced with a life changing ethical/moral dilemma in the event they are asked to launch nuclear weapons. The very thought of such an event should send shivers up all of our spines as its ramifications, including global nuclear war, is the stuff nightmares are made of.

If any one of those airmen hesitates just long enough to ask the question "What would Jesus Do?” or start babbling prayers for guidance, or fumbling with their rosary beads and waiting for a sign from God during the critical moment, we could well be worse off as a nation than had the launch order been immediately executed...unquestioned and instantaneously. If by settling the religious issue or, shall I say, if by justifying mass killing on religious grounds as part of training it eliminates that hesitation, then this may in fact be a reasoned and logical approach.

So, it's not proselytizing to non-Xtians, or even the government endorsing one religion over another. It’s a matter of recognition that the job of these selected few, largely believing, must never be impaired by thinking too hard on how their deity perceives mass destruction. They lay it out and nail it shut: “He's done it lots of times, and He has endorsed it lots more... it’s all good. So be ready to push the button on command.”

I wonder if CFI has given it this kind of thoughtful consideration. I’ll give the Air Force a pass on this one.

[Thanks to Linda Mortensen for the inspiration for this article]

Your Mom was Mistaken - Rape and Pedophilia are Next to Godliness

2011-07-23T17:30:00.002-04:00

I was reading Mojoey’s latest report on a convicted clergy pedophile on his Deep Thoughts blog http://mojoey.blogspot.com/ The convicted rapist minister of an 11 year old girl looks forward to continue to do god’s work when he gets out in eighteen years. Yes, he said “continue.” Mojoey was repelled by the deviate’s apparent cognitive dissonance. But while it sounds bizarre, a case of denial and delusion, the pastor’s comment actually makes perfect sense.

Your mom probably told you that cleanliness is next to godliness. Well, she was partially right. There are all kinds of laws in the Bible that mandated sanitary practices, not the least of which is where exactly to take a dump during wartime - albeit, your mom likely was totally unaware of that little detail [Deut. 23:12].

God sets the example for what “godliness” is, hence the term. How can one strive to be as God to any greater degree than emulating God’s example, applying God’s lessons in life? Taking a dump outside of the camp, not having sex with unclean (menstruating) women; sending a soldier outside of camp for having a wet dream are just the tip of the divine iceberg.

God encouraged child rape (Numbers 31; Deut 20). Among the 613 laws in the Old Testament not one prohibits pedophilia.

God punishes rape of an unattached young [Hebrew] woman with a $50 payment to her dad, and requiring the victim to marry her rapist (Deut 22). Jewish movie starlets, beauty queens and super models would have been in big demand back then, and constantly in hiding.

God gives instructions on how to rape your [non-Hebrew] enemy’s women (Judges 21).

There’s more. But the point is their God is one horny old bastard who encourages pedophilia, and doesn’t go out of his way to discourage rape ... openly endorsing it in many cases. How could a man of the cloth be expected to ignore God’s word? Does not God’s laws and example transcend earthly secular laws? Did Jesus/the New Testament have anything to say about ignoring his/his dad’s long standing example as the supreme cocksman? Nope.

Not only should the convicted pastor not be condemned by Christians, he should be considered among the blessed, a true follower of God’s divine word, a living example of the Holy Bible’s sacred practices. So too the thousands of priests, bishops, pastor, youth ministers who similarly are doing god’s work to children all over the planet.

His will be done.

OK, I admit it - I hate stupid

2011-07-18T19:03:00.005-04:00

I hate stupid. There, I said it. I’m not ashamed and I’m not going to feign being penitent about it. Stupid is the cause of too many societal ills to be just politely ignored. It warrants ... no... demands unbridled disdain from those of us who eschew stupid.

Let me be clear: I’m not talking about people who through no fault of their own due to genetic or congenital defect, or for physiological reasons lack the full complement of mental acuity. Nor do I condemn people who were denied a basic education or exposure to human interaction. I’m speaking about people who are articulate, who can type, think, and navigate through the complexities of life, who are productive members of society in almost every way - people who are equipped to evaluate varied input, process it, and arrive at a logical and reasoned conclusion if they would allow themselves to.

Examples of obvious stupid include Young Earth Creationists, Intelligent Design advocates, and those who perceive Sarah Palin, Michele Bachmann, or Rick Perry to be qualified to lead the free world. Cultists, spiritualists, Flat Earthers; those who pay homage to urine stains that resemble religious figures; those who believe gayness is a choice; the Governor of Oklahoma who today, responding to the massive heat wave, has donned the mantle of Chief Shaman of Oklahoma declaring a day of prayer for rain (you’d think he’d go the whole nine yards and pray for a snow storm). The list goes on ad nauseum.

I give a pass to conspiracy theorists because there is a wiring problem in their psyches that requires them to dismiss evidence that doesn’t support their theories, in fact just providing debunking evidence has the effect of reinforcing their delusion. It’s just sad.

With that as a prelude allow me to describe my latest interaction with the profoundly stupid. It seems QVC has decided not to sell Jane Fonda’s latest book, fearing a backlash from people who haven’t forgotten nor forgiven her treachery during the Vietnam War. A facebook friend posted the story to his page and garnered mixed responses. One person in particular, who it seems is just to the Left of Chairman Mao, insisted that Fonda’s going to North Vietnam was a good and justified thing, since the war was unjust and we should have never been there. The final bit of stupidity was the comment that it was further justified because the enemy wasn’t the North Vietnamese at all, but Lyndon Johnson.

It doesn’t make any difference what one’s perspective is on the Vietnam War. I favored it when I went there, opposed it when I came home, and was active in anti-war protests. The war was a bad misstep. The “domino theory” of the spread of Communism was a fallacy (easy to say in hindsight), and came close on the heals of the McCarthy era when much of the populace was initially anxious to kill Commies for Christ at the drop of a hat.

But forget all that. The issue with Fonda was, and still is, that as a US citizen she went to an enemy nation with whom we were engaged in active combat, gleefully posed in enemy headgear on enemy artillery that was shooting down American planes; smiled and hobnobbed with senior enemy military officials; encouraged N. Vietnamese resistance; was manipulated into giving misleading information about the treatment of American POWs; broadcast on Hanoi Radio against her country; bolstered the resolve of the enemy giving them aid and comfort while demoralizing 18 and 19 year old American boys who were struggling to stay alive and in one piece.

I wouldn’t have cared if she had burned the flag, wiped her ass with the Constitution, or demanded Lyndon Johnson’s assassination just so long as she did it on US soil. One does not go over to the enemy that has killed 50,000+ of your fellow countryman and give them your support in order to make a political point.

Imagine if an actor or actress went to Afghanistan, met with the Al-Qaida’s leadership, donned their uniform, gleefully posed on their ground to air missiles, and broadcasted on their radio decrying US soldiers presence there as criminal, and the soldiers war criminals. Whether one agrees with the war or not, respects Obama or hates him, it would be roundly and rightly condemned by any thinking American as a despicable if not treasonous act.

In 1988 Fonda apologized for her actions agreeing that they were ill conceived and hurtful on a number of levels. She wished she hadn’t done them. I don't care if she is your gay icon, if you loved her in "On Golden Pond," or if she gave you a semi-fattie in "Barbarella," the fact is her behavior was dispicable and unforgivable and she knows it.

While I personally reject her apology as too little too late, you’d think that it would be enough to convince the most devout Jane Fonda worshipper, even the most rabid left wing self hating American, to drop their justification and defense of her actions. Nope. Not even the apologetic admission of Fonda herself sways their position. To this Facebook expert on Vietnam and patriotism (and two of her high-fiving sheep) Fonda’s behavior was good and reasoned; anyone not seeing that is a simply jingoistic, right wing Fox News watching, war mongering, imperialist running dog stooge of Lyndon Johnson, who is oblivious to the history of American foreign intrusions, the injustice of the Vietnam war, the subterfuge of the Military Industrial Complex, and just plain don’t get it.

That is stupid. I hate stupid

A Mormon Missionary meets his first Atheist Camel

2011-07-14T19:45:00.002-04:00

I get awful tired of seeing those facebook ads promoting one Christian sect or another. I always click on them because it costs them money every time someone does. I have already been banned from a few of the fb pages they link to.

Lately the “...and I’m a Mormon” ad campaign has caught my attention. It seems to come up often throughout the day, almost every time I get on facebook. The link takes you directly to http://mormon.org/jeff (“jeff” being that ad’s Mormon profile), so I can’t exercise my right to post troll messages as I am want to do from time to time.

The ads are designed to put a human face on what many people think of as a cult. Oh, let me be more direct: what I think of as a 19th century charlatan’s inventive rework of Christianity in order to scam money from credulous jerks of the day.

These ads feature normal everyday folk, who do normal every day things; who served in the military; lost a leg in an accident; raised a bunch of foster kids; or coach soccer. You know, “Everyman.” Naturally they do not get into the nitty gritty of what makes Mormons the red headed step child of Christianity (as opposed to the JW’s who are seen more as the insane relative who is best kept locked in the attic).

No, no mention of the coincidence that the church leadership had a revelation from God to give up polygamy simultaneous with the Federal Government’s threat to deny Utah statehood until they did. No mention of the lost tribes of Israel that occupied North America, rode elephants, had chariots, iron weapons, armor, horses....thousands of years before the Spanish came to the new world, and for which no trace has ever been found in spite of investing massive amounts of money on archeological works to find proof.

No mention of the 1857 Mountain Meadows Massacre when Mormons, arguably at the direction of Brigham Young, dressed as Indians and slaughtered non-Mormon settlers passing through Utah. No mention of the “delightsome” white people versus the accursed Black folk whose blackness is the eternal punishment of the mark of Cain. No discussion of institutionalized racism until the 1970’s, blacks being denied the right to the priesthood.

No mention of the doctrine that if they tithe enough, do missionary work, rise through the ranks, and lead lives of complete obedience they will become a God of their own planet.

Nope, they want to separate themselves from these things and other really nutty Mormon stuff, and just be perceived as Jesus loving Christians like you and me...well, you know what I mean... like any other Christian sect, except that they wear magical mystery undies. So I visited mormon.org, and clicked on the “Chat with a Missionary” button to have my questions answered. Here’s how it went after a full five minute wait for the missionary to appear on the chat screen:

John: Hello, my name is John. Did you have a question about the LDS Church that I can answer for you?

Hump: Hi John, yes just a few questions if you don’t mind. When you die do you get to chose what planet you become the god over, or is assigned? Is Pluto still viable even though it’s been downgraded to something other than a planet? Does the population of that planet currently exist or do they come from Utah after you arrive? Are they human, and if not, if they are aliens, do they look humanoid? And if they don’t look humanoid, why would they accept you as their god? And if you are their god, does that mean they reject Jesus, the Father, and the Holy Spirit as their deity, or just see you as a demi-god like one of the Hindu lesser gods? If the latter, will you have multiple arms, maybe a trunk, and have a bluish hue, or will you look like you do now... only with a halo?

John: Are you serious?

Hump: As serious as a heart attack.

John: I don’t really know about all those things.

Hump: Ok, well...give me someone who can give me the answers . This is really important because I’ve had an offer to join another cult and they guarantee I’ll command a planet of transformer like aliens to do my bidding when I die.

John: What do you mean “another cult”? We aren’t a cult. And I’m at home there is no one else here to speak to.

Hump: C’mon John, they aren’t going to stick you on a computer keyboard representing the LDS Church unprepared to answer some serious doctrinal questions, unsupervised, with only the most basic and boring info, and not prepare you for the “God of your own planet” queries.

John: Sorry, no, I mean, yes ... they did. May be I can have some one get in touch with you. If you give me your email...

Hump: OK John, atheistcamelchronicles@msn.com. And I’d like it to be a Mormon woman, preferably Julianne Hough, or Marie Osmond. I have some questions about institutionalized sexism and subservience.

John: What do you mean subservience?

Hump: Don’t worry John, they’ll know what I mean. Bye.

John: Bye.

I can just see his Mormon Overseer looking at this transcript and dressing John down for being such a dork. Everyone knows that Mormon’s morph into Klingons when they become gods. After all, who’d respect a god that looks like a pimply faced kid in a cheap black suit, white shirt and skinny tie who believes hair will grow on his palms if he masturbates. Well, I mean, besides another Mormon. They seem to believe anything.

On applying the “Golden Rule”

2011-07-07T14:17:00.006-04:00

- “How do you decide to apply the Golden Rule?”
- “How can you so easily call another person stupid when you don't even know them?”

- “The Golden Rule is meant to be used as a means to find the humanity in others even when we don't like them or disagree with them. So what is your standard for applying the Golden Rule?”

These questions were posed to me by a friend who took exception with my dismissal of the Casey Anthony jury as grossly wrong in their decision and evidently too stupid to properly assess a preponderance of circumstantial evidence. It was also noted that I am rather liberal with my open disdain for and insulting of individuals and groups with whom I have zero patience and even less respect.

Her questions are worthy of serious introspection.

The Golden Rule, AKA the Rule of Reciprocity - to those who know that its doctrine predates the Jesus myth - by any name is at the foundation of civilization itself. Societies that do not practice treating others as you want them to treat you are destined for extinction. A culture that has no inhibitions against wanton murder, thievery, rape, deception, perjury, et all and which practices those things as social norms would self destruct in the chaos of disorder. The Rule of Reciprocity was born of the recognition that if you smash Og’s head with a rock and steal his dingo dinner, one of Og’s kinsman will likely return the favor.

In that regard I fully support and practice The Rule. I am a product of a civilized and flourishing society. I do not have any psychologically induced defects (that I am aware of) that prompt anti-social/sociopathic disregard for humanity, morality, ethics, and the law. Kind to animals, respectful of fellow travelers in the quest for sustained happiness and freedom, and tolerant of children with a modicum of manners, I try and do my part to ease the suffering of those I can help and treat them as I myself would like to be treated.

BUT, this does not imply that I endorse turning the other cheek when being beaten senseless; or ignoring the trespasses of others who do so with a sense of entitlement; or holding my tongue when the behavior and actions of others exposes an unsavory agenda, diminishes our freedoms or reflects abandonment of basic intelligence.

I treat people who embrace reason and reality with respect. I expect the same from them.
I also have admiration for those who demonstrate a concern for their fellow man and animals, and who see education-the expanding of ones knowledge- as a sacrament. I have no patience for, and no interest in courting the respect of, people who lack self-reliance, self-respect; who are dependent on myth; who reject reality; who are incapable of assessing evidence and formulating an intelligent and logical opinion in response. Society will not be irreparably harmed by my position.

The Golden Rule as I perceive it was never meant to suppress ones expression of outrage or disgust with the outrageous and disgusting. To gloss over, sugar coat, or otherwise acquiesce to such actions or thought with a smile and genteel admonishment is not who I am or who I’d want to be. I have no obligation to spare the feelings of those unworthy of my respect, nor do I have a desire to win their respect or admiration. If their sensibilities are injured; if they are emotionally damaged; or provoked to reply in kind I am unmoved. Besides...if I were an unthinking imbecile I’d expect to be treated like one.

I am one of many “umpires of life” and remain unapologetic about calling ‘em like I see ‘em. If my honesty hurts then correct the defect- don’t expect false civility. Going through life worrying about offending those who are offensive and offended is not who I am. That’s why you’ll rarely see a camel skin door mat.

Live Radio/Webcast with Humanists of Minnesota

2011-07-05T21:10:00.002-04:00

Mark Your Calendar:
Sunday, July 10, 10:00 am Eastern/ 9:00 am Central

I'll be interviewing with Scott Lohman of Humanists of Minnesota about my blog, books, and pet rescue business. Should be interesting since nothing is prepared in advance and they have a listener's Call-in number: (952) 946-6205.

Radio and live streaming webcast: http://www.am950ktnf.com/

See you on the radio.

Fasten your seatbelts - God’s REALLY pissed off now!

2011-06-28T14:01:00.002-04:00

God is mad as hell and isn’t gonna take it anymore. It seems the New York law allowing gay marriage was the straw that broke the deity’s back. We are about to experience His wrath ala Sodom and Gomorrah. Yup, hell fire and damnation for the entire nation is right around the corner.

And how do I know this? On Monday God sent a message to his spokesman Pat Robertson. Pat told us so during his 700 Club broadcast. The same place he touts his miracle muscle building elixir, declared the Haitian hurricane tragedy a result of a “deal with the devil”, and suggested we send hit men to kill Venezuela’s president. Here’s the link to the story: http://www.ontopmag.com/article.aspx?id=8782&MediaType=1&Category=26

Usually I’d just laugh it off and wouldn’t give it another moments thought. Robertson’s buffoonery and past asinine claims have succeeded in placing him along side May 21st end times prophet Harold Camping on the shelf labeled “Religious Fanatics: death past due.” But this kind of social vindictiveness, this religiously induced homophobia, intolerance and denial of reality and biology has the effect of stirring the pot and igniting the ire of already ignorant religious drones. Drones who give fools like Robertson credence; who really believe the garbage spewed forth from his pie hole.

No. I can’t just ignore it. I’m getting seriously tired of religiously inspired stupidity. Secular stupidity is bad enough, but when shaken or stirred with a measure of supernaturalist delusion and self righteousness the annoyance factor is increased exponentially.

Look, Pat ... if you’re reading this do the civilized thinking world a favor: Go sell your crazy someplace else, this country is already overstocked with it. And perhaps a nice long dirt nap would do you some good. I know it would make my day.

“Less than human” a Rabbi’s Perspective of Atheism

2011-06-17T14:47:00.004-04:00

A Facebook friend was rather upset about a video she viewed in which a renowned rabbi implies that atheists are “non-human.” Not willing to post it on her page and lambasting the rabbi openly out of concern for offending her Jewish friends, she sent me the link and asked for my opinion. Here’s the three minute youtube video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hGkI87Rx7o8&feature=related

Let me preface this by saying that I am familiar with Rabbi Sacks. A learned Hebraic scholar, he speaks with authority on Jewish history and law, the Torah, and midrash. That said, he is still a believer, still a superstitionalist, still a rejecter of reality.

I reject his basic premise of the need for humans to seek “meaning” outside the “system.” His examples are fraught with all kinds of problems, but hey... it’s what theists do. But I would not interpret his closing comment as a condemnation of atheists as "non-human." What he is saying is that in his opinion those who do not embrace a meaning of life beyond the "system" of nature and the reality of the natural universe, lack a trait /a belief (what Dawkin's calls "the religion meme") which is unique to humans.Now, in the rabbi’s opinion this is a defect and is a diminishing of humanity / “less than human”. But to realists, to those unencumbered by this missing "meme," or who have the ability to suppress it and over come it, substituting reason in its stead - it is an evolutionary advancement.

Look at it another way. Let’s imagine the rabbi as an early ancestor to humans who has seen a transformation among his species. As a dominant pack leader he would be compelled to espouse (if it could reason and talk) that any of their kind who does not walk on all fours and have a prehensile tail is missing something, it's unnatural, and is something "less." From that soon to be extinct ancestor's perspective he's right. The more advanced species that walks on two legs and has lost its tail has something less than its predecessor species. We walk on fewer appendages, and we no longer need a tail to hang from trees. And aren't we glad.

Frankly, as the more advanced species I’ll happily be deemed as “less” than one of our flea infested, tree climbing ancestors. In short, considering the source, being referred to as less than human in this theist’s parlance is the greatest compliment he could pay atheists. This may be the quintessential example of the truth of the old saw “less is more.”

Now on Kindle!!

2011-06-16T19:55:00.002-04:00

“What’s ruining this country is....!!” The Xtians ‘splain it all to us.

2011-06-10T18:54:00.004-04:00

Warning: I'm going to go on a rant here.

I read an article headline where some Christian group has declared that homosexuality and abortion is what brought on the financial crisis. I thought it was from the Onion, thus satire. It wasn’t. I didn’t get past the headline.

Last week a Xtian woman told me that pornography is destroying the country. So she signed a petition by some sexually obsessed/repressed Xtians to stop NBC from airing a TV series about the 1950’s Playboy club. The costumes on Dancing with the Nobodies will be racier than the Playboy outfits.

Although I have been chastised for labeling some Christians imbeciles, stupid, and unthinking, I will now add to that utterly clueless and fucked-up. That makes it five defaming labels... they win the quinella and deservedly so.

What’s ruining this country isn’t gays who simply want to be happy and treated equally, or women who insist on retaining the right to control their reproductive system, or guys flogging the bishop while looking at porn (much less looking at women in one piece bathing suits with cotton bunny tails). Nope. None of that has one damn thing to do with any of the perceived ills of this country.

What’s ruining this country are the school boards who want kids to be taught that Gawd created all life, and evolution is a fraud...setting back the teaching of science by 100 years.

What’s ruining this country is the admiration and glorification of buffoons, political hacks, and uneducated “celebrities” who believe Paul Revere’s midnight ride was to “...warn the British that they weren’t going to take the colonist’s guns.” [Palin]. Or that The Shot Heard Round the World which started the Revolutionary War at Lexington & Concord Massachusetts, was in New Hampshire [Bachmann]. Or that the president “probably doesn’t” have a US birth certificate [Trump].

What’s ruining this country is distortion of history, no... lets call it what it is... the bald face lies about our nation’s history in order to support a religious agenda. I.e. The Ten Commandments is the foundation for American law; our Founding Fathers were all Christians who wanted a Christian Nation; Thomas Jefferson didn’t mean separation of church and state when he wrote the Virginia Constitution’s prohibition of sectarian intrusion by government and used the term "Wall of Separation.".

What’s ruining this country is the bizarre insistence that patriotism cannot exist without religious delusion.

What’s ruining this country is the ignoring of the law by school officials who promote and encourage prayer at school sponsored programs, in direct violation of the Supreme Court.

What’s ruining this country is the hope of those same religious fanatics and haters that our economy doesn’t recover under Obama; that unemployment remains high, the stock market falls, and the recession continues to cause pain and suffering for millions - the better to improve their chances of getting a Republican in the White House in 2012.

What’s ruining this country are people who have surrendered personal responsibility for raising their children by seeking to ban a TV show instead of banning their children from watching it. Or who surrender their self determination to an unseen non-existent God, and pray to it to make everything good. Or who surrender some of their freedoms to gain a little safety. Or who expect Government to do for them that which they should do for themselves.

What’s ruining this country are politicians who ask their constituents to pray for rain during draught, pray for the economy to recover, pray to have god bless this nation, and who kowtow to the lunatic religious fringe to whom such things are worthwhile government responses to our ills.
Gays, abortions and porn have existed for millenniums. They aren’t causing the demise of our nation. Credulity, deception, the dumbing down of our education system, and reverence for gross stupidity can claim title to putting us on the road to Third Worldism.

OK, I feel better now.

Yes, Virginia, they are imbeciles.

2011-06-05T19:54:00.003-04:00

im·be·cile
–noun
1. Psychology . a person of the second order in a former classification of mental retardation, above the level of idiocy, having a mental age of seven or eight years and an intelligence quotient of 25 to 50.
2. a dunce; blockhead; dolt.
–adjective
3. mentally feeble.
4. showing mental feebleness or incapacity.
5. stupid; silly; absurd.

http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/imbecile

I was recently taken to task by a good friend, confidant and fellow atheist for referring to those who invested their life savings in Mr. Camping’s end times prediction as tantamount to being mental defectives, imbeciles.

This friend was herself once terminally infected with the God Virus, belonging to one of the charismatic Christian sects. She had the strength, and intellect, to see through it and break the chains of religious enslavement. But she reminded me that those who are still encumbered with the fundamentalist mindset are victims of indoctrination “brain washing.” I don’t necessarily disagree. As I have said many times, had not these people’s minds been infected early and steeped in superstitious gibberish by family, friends and clergy from childhood, it is likely they would have never been willing recruits.

But there is a big difference between being inducted into the prevailing culture’s religion, even brain washed into accepting the most outrageous concepts and tenets of the fringe sects; and imbuing some old fool radio personality with a prophetic gift to whom you willingly bequeath the bulk of your savings in anticipation of his predicted end of the world scenario. A BIG difference.

Some are now angry at Camping. They should be angry at themselves, but I fear they aren’t smart enough to see that. Some others still believe in Camping, accept his calculation error, and eagerly await the new and improved October 21 prophecy of rapture followed by complete destruction of all life on earth. Whether the former or the latter the fact is these people ARE stupid. They ARE silly. They ARE dolts. They show a degree of mental feebleness in their credulity that is reserved for a miniscule percent of believers. These people are then, by definition, imbeciles. Oh, perhaps not clinically, but certainly in the colloquial sense of the word.

Do I feel sorry for them? No. I won’t shed a tear, nor would I contribute to them a single cent. I’ll save my sympathy and my donations for those people who have fallen on hard times because of the economy, or because of physical disability, or even mental disability caused by disease, injury, or genetic predisposition. I have no sympathy for those who have invested their lives and fortunes in soothsayers, shaman, man-gods, the supernatural, and the patently absurd. They’ve had the same choices, the same opportunity to build up the anti-virus we call Reality, Reason, and Logic as did my friend who has been in remission and is now God Virus free.

Yes, Virginia... I called these people imbeciles, and I am unrepentant.

WARNING: “Jesus Brain” can substantially reduce your processing capacity

2011-05-29T08:14:00.002-04:00

Religionists don’t process data like we do. Oh, I know what you’re thinking:
“Duh, Hump! Tell us something we don’t know,” or “Yeah, ‘cuz their religionists.” But it’s not that simple. In fact, it came to me as a revelation last week.

This will be the last time I mention the EE-BP rapture thing for as long as I can avoid it. Frankly I’m bored to death with it even though I have condemned myself to having to deal with it daily to some degree or another. But it has taught me a lot about how some Christians think (or don’t think) and lead me to the realization that their brains aren’t wired like ours.

I received many thousands of email from atheists and believers alike. But one constant question kept coming up from believers. So often does this query arise that I have a form letter in my draft file that requires me only to insert the respondent’s name and hit send. The question is this:

“You say you are an atheist. If that’s so, how can you charge for and offer a service for something you don’t even believe will happen? Does this mean you’ll give a refund if the rapture doesn’t happen?”

Now, whenever this question pops up on my screen I reflexively rub my eyes, scratch my neck and shake my head in complete befuddlement.. No doubt the inquiry makes perfect sense to the afflicted, albeit I can’t begin to comprehend how they get this confused.
It’s tantamount to asking:
“You’re betting horse A will lose; I’m betting he’ll win. If you don’t believe horse A will win why are you betting against him...and will you pay me if he loses?”

Say what???

It seems there is a short circuit in their analytical skills. Simple reasoning powers elude them. What is obvious to you and I, the thinking, becomes a brain teaser to these folks. Whether this defect is the cause of why they are drawn to religiosity, or whether religiosity causes this defect in them I can only guess.

What makes this particularly disconcerting is that this peculiar disability is likely running rampant among the religious right, people in position of responsibility; people who make laws, elect representatives, determine what is taught in their schools. It is the prevalence of this peculiar non-think that sheds new light on things that previously were a mystery to me. For instance:

· How can so many of the religious right even remotely perceive Sarah Palin to be qualified to run the planet’s most powerful nation?
· Why do some legislators think its fine if Jesus’ name is invoked during a pre-session prayer, but don't see the hypocrisy of their outrage at the mention of a pagan god or Allah ?
· How can grown men speculate on the shape of a banana and arrive at the conclusion that God designed it to fit man’s hand?
· How can the anti-Christian writings of Jefferson, Paine, Adams, Madison and other Founding Fathers be construed to imply this was meant to be a “Christian Nation”?

Well, I no longer have to ponder these and many other questions that were baffling to me. The answer is now clear. Their brains do not process reality or even the simplest concept as do thinking people’s brains. Reason is passed through the filter of religio-think; bathed in a plasma of confusion; treated with a does of reality disconnect; coated with doctrinal babble and finally extruded through the cells of an atrophied brain.

The end product is all too often gross stupidity.

Agnostics: Carriers of the recessive God Virus gene

2011-05-22T19:51:00.004-04:00

The following is an extract from one of thousands of emails I received during the May 21 rapture fiasco.

“Question, am I a candidate for pet rescuer being that I'm not atheist I'm an Orthodox Agnostic? Let me know.”

I don’t have anything against those calling themselves agnostic. I just don’t get this “I’m an agnostic, not an atheist” horse puckey.

Oh, I understand the definition of agnostic alright,”... the essential nature of (God) is unknown and unknowable,” therefore they won’t just say “I don’t have belief in God/gods,” they demur and say “it’s unknowable.”

Bull spigots!

Are they similarly "agnostic" about leprechauns, faeries, Bigfoot, zombies, vampires, gnomes, trolls, or any of the myriad fictional characters invented by man since the beginning of time? After all, the essential nature of them is unknown and unknowable. They can neither be proven nor disproven. Neither can Russell’s fictional teapot that floats in orbit somewhere, full of steaming Earl Grey tea. Agnostic about interstellar porcelain tableware?

The problem with agnosticism is that it places more credibility in the possibility of god/gods than it does on those other fictional characters. That’s why they are more likely to reject the other fictions out of hand. The only reason agnostics do so, and allow the agnostic position to survive, is directly attributable to the impact that the God Virus has had on civilization for thousands of years. Agnostics carry a recessive religion meme Vs the religionists’ dominant propensity toward belief. Atheists seem to have been born without that receptor, or if they were once theist, have learned to suppress and overcome it.

My educated guess is that had a book about the existence of wish granting, psychopathically inclined, vengeful Pixie been written 3,500 years ago, and updated 1700 years ago as a sequel, people would claim agnosticism about Pixies too.

Something worth thinking about.

The End is Near- REPENT! Or at least, don’t laugh so hard

2011-05-16T18:48:00.003-04:00

It won’t be long now. In fact, according to a whole bevy of religious morons, this should be my last blog, unless The Anti-Christ gives me the ok. The May 21st Rapture event is almost upon us. And even though it’s been great for my post rapture pet rescue business (sales volume up 27% for the 1st quarter versus 2010) frankly it’s been a drain.

Between interviews with newspapers and radio stations all over the country, Canada, Australia, and New Zealand; and the over 1400 emails we received from atheists, prospective clients, clients and raving lunatic Christians, I’ve been ignoring my husbandly duties and just as importantly, the dogs. I’m glad it’s almost over.

But I suspect May 22 is going to be anticlimactic, something of a let down. Oh, not just for the rapture believing nutters who have bought into Mr. Camping’s prophesy, That’s a given; but also for me and I imagine millions of atheists around the country. I’ll explain...

Like most of us thinking folks, I look forward to being able to rub the noses of the deluded into their failed prophesy. I want to hold out hope that some of them take this as a kick in the ass learning experience which causes them to rethink their foolish doctrine, or at least recognize their gullibility. I want to see the purveyors of the fraud called on the carpet by their duped followers, and watch them sheepishly hem and haw in the glare of the TV lights, beads of embarrassment induced sweat dripping down their porcine cheeks and red necks.

But none of this will happen. It’s wishful thinking on my part. What will happen is what happens after every an End Times prophesy is hyped by some soothsaying cross kissing huckster. The duped will be too embarrassed to admit their hysteria (enthusiasm?) was stupid. They will simply say it was “premature” and that the rapture is right around the corner...really!! Instead of diminishing their faith it will be renewed, made stronger. Count on it.

Mr. Camping, and his shaman ilk who have promoted the event, will shamelessly claim their calculations were off. They failed to carry the two, or factor in the time change, or divide by the Trinity, or some such nonsensical horse hockey. They’ll go back to the drawing board and, unabashedly, come up with a new date. They always come up with a new date.

They may even claim that Jesus pulled a bait and switch and postponed things to give non-believers “one more chance” to come to their senses, repent and embrace him. All of this of course out of mercy for which Jesus has become so famous.

Invariably I’ll be flooded with emails from fundie pet owners who paid for a ten year post rapture pet rescue contract, and now want a refund ‘cuz they were banking on May 21 being the big one, and need their money to pay next week’s rent on their double-wide. They are in for another disappointment.

Yeah, it’s going to be a let down. How much better it would have been if they beamed up, leaving only intelligent life here on Earth. Oh well, there’s always the Dec. 2012 Mayan calendar end of the world prediction. I can hardly wait.

On Death and Dying (only one is worth worrying about)

2011-05-11T22:18:00.000-04:00

Ask a Christian what the best thing about being a believer is. After a few stumbling attempts and some meaningless babble about their “personal relationship” with Jesus, the warm fuzzy feeling of knowing they don’t actually have to think, and the benefits of their man-god granting their wishes, they will eventually get to the meat and potatoes of Christian belief ... the promise of eternal life.

Death is the great unknown and not something anyone in their right mind (and with a tolerable quality of life) would strive for. Given the choice, we’d all like it to occur later rather than sooner. But to the ancients, especially those to whom life was a miserable hideous burden, fraught with discomfort, disease, unending toil, unimaginable poverty, the constant threat of sudden brutal death, injustice and little or no prospects of it getting any better, the assurance that their misery will pay off is quite an attractive plum. Besides, the down side of failing to believe guaranteed an eternal afterlife that was even worse than their current existence.

I wonder, given the unimaginably horrible existence of those uneducated peasants, if I had been one of them would I be drawn to belief, and embrace Christianity for its eternal happy after-life ever after prospect? For what would I have to lose? It’s not like I’d have to worry about losing my dignity...as a peasant (or slave) I would have had no dignity to begin with. I doubt you’d have had to ask me twice.

The Church fathers used this doctrine as a carrot and stick recruitment technique. It was a brilliant stroke of genius. Perhaps the best scam ever invented.

But even our most destitute down trodden citizens have more education than your typical 2nd century peasant. One would also expect their level of sophistication and skepticism would be light years more advanced. But it makes no difference. The stick of the finality of death and the carrot of a much better eternal happy life in exchange for accepting a story is hard for the credulous to resist.

Christians will tell you that they don’t fear death, because they know they are “saved” from the finality of death, the punishment of hell’s tortures and the inequities inherent in life on Earth. But they lie. The very reason they believe in the first place is precisely because of their fear of death. The latest Pew Forum study reported that the most devout Christians are the people who spend the most on medical options to extend their lives when faced with a terminal disease. Hedging their bets one would expect .

As a thinking person I don’t fear death. Death is simply reverting to oblivion, the same oblivion that existed before I was born. Fearing death is irrational. I was unbothered by my pre-birth non-existence; therefore I have no reason to believe my post-death non-existence would be any different. Besides, it’s not personal... everything dies. Life is good while it lasts. No harm, no foul. I do, however, fear the prospect of dying. Dying can get quite messy, painful and expensive. That’s a rational response for a neat freak that abhors pain and hates wasting money.

Christians are so befuddled by ancient lies that have been drummed into their heads that they can’t accept life and death for what it is. And in so doing, they waste vast amounts
of the only life time they will ever have immersed in the delusion and make believe of their death cult’s inane rituals, prayers, groveling, and proselytizing.

News Flash, Christians! Death is simply nature’s way of telling us to go away.

Washington Post Story..on ME!

2011-05-06T19:43:00.003-04:00

In lieu of an article this week I am posting a link to today's Washington Post story on my Eternal Earth-Bound Pets post rapture pet rescue web business. It ran on their website today, and will be in their paper Monday May 9. Enjoy!

http://www.washingtonpost.com/local/service-will-take-in-fido-after-the-rapture-for-a-fee/2011/05/05/AFcZJn7F_story.html

2011-05-02T07:53:00.001-04:00

On May 5th turn the National Day of Prayer into the National Day Reason

2011-05-01T19:41:00.008-04:00

On May 5th the religiously afflicted will presumably do exactly the opposite of Jesus’ admonishment to pray in private and instead will make a great show of public prayer. I can’t imagine what they will be praying about, but given the fact that there was a National Day of Prayer last year, and in 2009, and 2008 I expect the results to be pretty much the same.

But, maybe I’m wrong. Maybe they didn’t pray for peace, but for more war. If so, their prayers were answered with a record breaking American death toll in Afghanistan and an inexplicable intrusion into Libya.

Perhaps they decided not to ask their boogieman for prosperity, but for a record breaking fiscal deficit, continued high unemployment, and more home foreclosures. If so, God heard their prayers.

Maybe they opted to forgo the challenge to pray for all amputees’ to re-grow limbs, and instead prayed for more kids in war torn Africa to have their arms amputated by rebel terrorists, more women being raped and children contracting AIDS. If so, their request was granted.

I’m guessing they also prayed for more illegal immigration, a record breaking oil spill in the Gulf, higher gasoline prices, more school shootings, a continued 50% divorce rate, the undermining of labor unions, floods in Australia, massive earthquakes and tsunamis that killed tens of thousands, and a nuclear disaster that will likely result in great suffering on those Asian pagans. Hallelujah, thy will be done! So much for thinking prayer doesn’t work.

So, while they continue to mumble their irrational superstitious idiocy to their non-existent Sky Daddy, Dead Jew, or whom/whatever, let us observe May 5th in our own unique and inimitable way. Here are some suggestions for observing May 5th the National Day of Reason:

Read a chapter of Darwin’s Origin of Species or any science book.

Watch a Hitchens or Dawkins debate or lecture on Youtube.

Find your favorite Bertrand Russell quote on Google and memorize it.

Email your Senators and Congressman and tell them to stop praying and get back to doing something meaningful for the country like they are being paid to do.

Make an unsolicited contribution to The Freedom from Religion Foundation or Americans United for the Separation of Church and State, or some other freethinking activist organization.

Donate a copy of my book to your local library.

You can probably think of some other rational actions of your own. I’ll not surrender May 5th to the ignorant and mindless. In my home reason and rationality will prevail, as always.

Reading Fodder for the Sheep

2011-04-26T19:38:00.008-04:00

Fundie Christians on the whole are not voracious readers. I chalk it up to three reasons: First, they lack a degree of intellectual curiosity, having already settled in on their “eternal Truth.” Second, the most religious states not only have the worst literacy rates, they are often among the most lacking in disposable income. Books aren’t big sellers in Mississippi and Alabama proportionate to the rest of the country. Third, reading takes a degree of concentration, something that likely challenges many of the most devout.

When the literate among them do buy books the hardcore Christians will often buy whatever their minister recommends, something “uplifting” from the Christian book shop, or one written by their favorite TV evangelist. Pat Robertson’s unending supply of published buffoonery often makes the best seller lists. You can pretty much assume they aren’t being purchased by brain surgeons or rocket scientists. [Interestingly, even with the many thousands of copies his books sell, there are a very small number of reader reviews posted to amazon, even when compared to books that sell less than 5% of his book’s volume. I can only speculate as to why that might be].

Last week two of the top three bestsellers on amazon.com’s Religion and Spirituality list were Heaven Is for Real: A Little Boy’s Astounding Story of His Trip to Heaven and Back, an account of a 4-year-old’s near-death experience as retold by his minister father. The other was Love Wins: A Book About Heaven, Hell, and the Fate of Every Person Who Ever Lived, by Rev. Rob Bell, a minister who recently came under fire for proffering that hell doesn’t exist. Heaven is for Real also made the NY Times best seller “non-fiction” list. Non-fiction?! So much for the vaunted NY Time’s credibility.

Why are these books so popular? In the case of the first book what more could one want than to read about an innocent child’s real live (dead?) trip to the great beyond and back, and all the wondrous things he saw there. It’s a reaffirmation from the mouths of babes that what they believed all along is now “proven.” After all, how could anyone doubt a child’s words, especially when his Dad is a holy roller? This must give an enormous surge of confidence to the heaven bent set.

The second book feeds a similar hopeful feeling for some ... that heaven is real, but hell may not be. Whew! Now there’s some good news for the back sliding among them. Good news unless you are a fundie who delights in the thought of Barack Obama, Bill Gates and every Jew on the planet burning for an eternity in a lake of fire. Without assurance of eternal punishment for the heathens half the benefit of being a “true” Christian is lost. But I suspect some of those people will buy it as well, just so they can rail against the undermining of their carved in stone doctrine of hell.

If only they had a little curiosity about their beliefs and the secular world. If only they had the courage to pull back the curtain - just a tad - and peak in to see if there are any genuine insights worthy of consideration. If only they’d spend some mental energy reading a genuine science book or two to see for themselves the beautiful logic and evidence of evolutionary theory.

If only they’d try reading a work by biblical scholars like Robert M. Price, Bart Ehrman, Richard E. Friedman, or Jonathan Kirsch; experts whose understanding of comparative religion, the motives of the writers of the Tanakh and the New Testament, non-biblical historical documents, archeology, etc., would open a world of new information and understanding about the foundation of their religion and its doctrines. What could be the harm?

Never mind, I think I just answered my own question.

The Camel celebrates "The Day of the Living Dead"

2011-04-21T19:26:00.005-04:00

I really look forward to the coming holiday. It’s the one day of the year that I actually set aside to pay homage to the Trinity that has contributed so much happiness, given hope to billions, and has left an indelible mark that forever changed civilization.

I’m referring of course to the trinity of Messers John Cadbury the founder of Cadbury Chocolates; Sam Born the founder of Born Candy; and David Klein the founder of Jelly Belly Jelly Beans. Three men, fully human yet fully god, whose confectionary delights have given true meaning to Easter.

For what would the sacred Day of the Living Dead be if not for those scrumptious Cadbury eggs, sugary marshmallow Peeps, and colorful jelly beans? Truly, they are manna from heaven, a divine gift from the Creators to their worshipping masses.

It has been a ritual since our boys were the same age that the children of the Midianites were when the Lard saw fit to direct their extermination that my wife would prepare for the holiday by assembling the sacred elements of the Eucharist. She would go to the basement and reverently extract the Sacred Ark, a Rubber Maid bin marked with masking tape upon which is inscribed “Day of the Living Dead Vestments”. With our sons in their holy Oshkosh habits chanting the hymn “Here comes Peter Cotton Tail, hopping down the bunny trail...” it’s inspiring words echoing through the vaulted basement ceiling, invoking a feeling of awe, reverence and spiritual ecstasy, she would lead the procession upstairs. Once there, the Ark was placed upon the alter aka, the kitchen table.

Then the choir boys were dismissed to hunt for the “Day of the Living Dead Holy Chicken Embryos” which Mrs Hump, the High Priestess, and the boys had dyed two days earlier on “Good and Dead Friday.” Only then did she extract from the Ark the colorful woven baskets, hallowed hollow plastic eggs, and sumptuous imitation grass stuffing. As assistant to her Holiness, it was my role to hand her the prescribed number of confections aka, the Eucharist, which she nestled into their respective holiday vessels.

And while I’d often protest that there were an insufficient number of Cadbury eggs, or Peeps to satisfy the multitude, verily she was able to fill each basket to the brim creating a plethora of high fructose delights. Holy, Holy, Holy shit that is some good stuff!!!

And then, after the Host had been received with shouts of Hosanna, and the symbolic bodies of the Trinity of John, Sam, and David has been devoured with much relish, and the sticky blood of the Cadbury yokes was cleansed from the face and hands of the faithfully glutonous, one of the children will ask: "Dad, can we go to church now and worship the King of Kings?" Then we'd all burst into laughter pratically peeing our pants. Afterall, with all that candy how could we fit even one Whopper Junior into our bellies?
Glory to Imitation Flavor and USDA Yellow Food Coloring #6 in the Highest!!!!

May your holiday be just as sweet and fulfilling as ours have been. Amen!
Oh, and as for those who pervert the holiday into a celebration of an imaginary man-god’s zombie act... CLUCK EM’!!

What's With Atheist’s Disdain for Liberal Christians?

2011-04-16T20:41:00.003-04:00

I’ve noticed in atheist blogs and fb pages that there is often greater hostility directed toward liberal Christians than toward the fundamentalist whackos. I find this both confusing and disturbing.

A creationist - Young Earth - evangelizing fundie will be challenged with scientific theory and evidence, their tired old apologetics and fake science soundly discredited with a preponderance of evidence, and all with a level of respect one would afford a person who is actually in full possession of their faculties.

But, a liberal Xtian, who accepts evolution, rejects as parable the Noah’s ark fable, perceives Revelation as a horror story unworthy of belief, the Rapture as laughable, and who doesn’t feel compelled to proselytize everyone in the group is treated with less respect, not just by their Fundie brethren but by atheists as well. I understand the fundies’ reasoning, they despise those who are apostates from the strict “company line” because they bastardize, thus weaken the faith. But the attitude of some hardcore-activist atheists toward liberal Christians disturbs me.

Yes, as liberal Christians they pick and chose what they want to believe from the Bible; and yes, they have modified their Christianity into a hybrid of 21st century scientific reality and 2nd century credulity. True, they can't fully break free of the warm fuzzy “loving God” concept while they readily accept proofs of scientific fact; understand homosexuality to be a fact of nature and accept it as such; and even go along with women’s right to choose. And often they recognize that the Biblical authors had an agenda, and that the Bible is likely not the word of God. But instead of condemning and belittling them for their straddling-the-fence mentality, shouldn’t we welcome and encourage their small step forward into the world of reality?

Some atheists protest that it is the liberalized Christians that allow religion to continue; that those who modify the hard core basic Christian dogma and doctrine are simply prolonging religion’s s continuation / preventing its rapid demise by making it more palatable to be only partially deluded. Without the liberal hybridization of religion it would die off faster. I reject that.

Not everyone who is raised theist can easily dump it all at once and be “born again” into secular reality. Isn’t it beneficial to society if theists / Christians undergo a gradual transformation ... an evolution if you will … to modern thinking, skepticism and acceptance of reality? Shouldn’t we be encouraging those Liberal /Semi-thinking Christians instead of treating them like the proverbial red headed stepchild?

Yes, today’s liberal Christians maybe accommodationists but they are very likely the parents or grandparents of tomorrow’s freethinking children. I’ll happily settle for that over Jesus Camp supporting, “fag” hating, crusade-for-Christ-war-mongering, Christian Nation promoting, and global warming denying fanatical parents any day.

Tell me I’m wrong.

From “Give us Barabbas” To “Give us our Molesting Pastor.” The Cry of the Lemmings

2011-04-11T21:06:00.005-04:00

I regularly visit a blog called “Deep Thoughts” written by internet friend and fellow free thinker “Mojoey.” Many of his posts are dedicated to exposing clergy who were recently indicted, arrested or convicted for theft, violence or sexual misconduct. It’s a worthy mission. http://mojoey.blogspot.com/

Time and again I have been stunned at the response of the congregations of these ministers, to the accusations leveled against them. But no more. Now I have come to expect it.

Invariably the congregations will side with the accused pastor while ignoring his history, the evidence, and the pain of the victims. From taking up collections for bail money, to searching the internet for blogs or newspaper reports in order to post their defense of their shepherd’s innocence, to overtly blaming and demonizing the victim -- there seems to be no limit to their capacity to elevate the accused and cloak him as the victim/ martyr.

I've tried to imagine something similar in a non-sectarian world. Would a secular club, fraternity, corporation, or non-profit organization solicit money from its members to post $350k in bail for a convicted sexual predator leader of the organization who has been indicted for committing multiple child rapes, the same crime he was convicted of 25 years previously? I can't think of a single historical example. http://seattletimes.nwsource.com/html/localnews/2014648646_ministersex01m.html

So what makes the church going rush to the defense of, and dig deep into their own pockets for such people? I’ll proffer three reasons:

First, religionists imbue their shaman with demigod like status. After all, a man who acts as a conduit between them and god must be pure of heart and thus must be falsely accused.

Second, because they are so dependent on their shaman, so invested in him as an oracle and anchor in their lives, that fear of his loss is overwhelming and takes precedence over justice.

Finally, they are so gullible that they can be easily manipulated by the perpetrator’s friends and family to ignore the hand writing on the wall, irrespective of the preponderance of evidence against him and veracity of his accusers. Perhaps Satan is behind the victim’s accusations.

This speaks volumes about the effect of religion on their minds. It so fills the psyche that it leaves little room reasoned judgment or logical discernment. It is “group think” run amok.

I imagine if Pontius Pilate gave them the choice between setting free an impoverished homeless man arrested for stealing food, or their ex-con minister accused of new multiple child rapes, it wouldn’t be too difficult a decision for them. Pathetic theist lemmings.

Confusing Religiosity with Patriotism: A Peculiar Theist Defect

2011-04-06T18:22:00.019-04:00

Nobody loves this country more than I. So much do I love it that in spite of its inequities and faults, I wouldn’t change a single word of the Constitution. It may not be perfect, but it’s the best document of its kind on the planet. There is no place else I’d rather live.

I love our flag. When I see it raised during the Olympic Games I feel pride. When I see it folded and handed to a veteran’s widow at a military funeral I can’t help but shed a tear. Forget about the effect the sound of echoing dual bugles playing “Taps” has on me. I don’t want to talk about that.

I love our service people. I think about them as they put their lives on the line everyday in places I wish they weren’t. I honor them on Veteran’s Day and Memorial Day, especially those who I served along side of in combat and who lost their lives. If called upon I would not hesitate to put my life on the line to defend this nation. I still can’t visit the Vietnam Memorial in DC. Forty-two years later, and it’s still too soon.

If what I wrote above was penned by a religionist there would be no question of their patriotic credentials. According to some number of Americans, Christians all, I do not qualify to be called a patriot because I have no belief in a supernatural spirit being. As an atheist I am something less than a full American, clearly not a patriot or so I have been told by President George H.W. Bush and those of similar religious fervor.

I recently visited a Facebook page with a patriotic title of “The Flag of the United States of America.” It immediately became clear that the page owner and its fans were war lovers and religious fanatics, as evidenced by a militaristic bent, bible quotes that extol the worship of God, and rants against those who would strip “under God” from the pledge, or who would drop “In God We Trust” from our motto and currency. The page followers were offering their own biblical verses, religious testimony, and “Amens” ad nauseum.

I scrolled down and came across a quote from Ben Franklin that referenced God’s all seeing and all knowing power; proof to these folks that our Founding Fathers were Christians, or more precisely, that God and Country were inseparable. Whether by ignorance or intent, the page owner and author of the post left out the fact that Franklin’s words were part of his suggestion to open the Constitutional Convention with a prayer to the almighty - an appeal that was soundly rejected by the majority of the Convention’s attendees, Aka our Founding Fathers. The motion was never adopted. I advised them of this, then promptly “unliked” the page lest some fb friends confuse me with a religious fanatic militarist.

Soon thereafter, a fb ad popped up on my page with a giant cross emblem that advertises The College of the Ozarks. Curious I clicked on it, and the first thing I was met with was this: “The vision of College of the Ozarks is to develop citizens of Christ-like character who are well-educated, hard-working, and patriotic.”

What is it about American religionists that make them insist belief in the supernatural is a qualifier, a prerequisite, for patriotism? How does believing in the supernatural transform one into a truer American?

Does Pat Tillman, the NFL football player who left a multi-million dollar career to volunteer for combat in the Middle East in the wake of 911 and who was killed in the line of duty, deserve less admiration because of his atheism?

Does Thomas Jefferson’s dismissal of Christianity - indeed his recorded distain for its doctrinal supernaturalism - strip him of the title patriot?

Does Lincoln’s statement that ”The Bible is not my book nor Christianity my profession. I could never give assent to the long, complicated statements of Christian dogma." diminish him or call his patriotism and love of country into question?

I’m not sure where this whole Jesus and the flag mindset started but likely it is a holdover from the cold war, McCarthyism, fear of losing our nation to the “Godless Communist Threat.” For certainly the introduction of God into the pledge and onto our currency was a direct result of those times and that fear. But that time is past. Jesus was not an American. He certainly never equated patriotism with support for war, much less endorsed either. It’s time for theists to stop confusing their religious delusion with a higher plane of patriotism and greater love of country. It is non-scriptural, divisive and damnably insulting.

If you’re face to face with me and have the urge to suggest that my love of reason and rejection of religious delusion diminishes my love of country, be sure to take your glasses off first. You won’t have time afterward.

More special treatment for the religiously challenged

2011-04-01T22:43:00.005-04:00

Last week I discussed the Mormons in Utah who are largely given a pass on practicing bigamy/polygamy by Utah authorities. But they aren’t the only ones who demand (if not receive) special treatment by virtue of their superstition.

Recently American Muslims and Muslims of foreign birth passing from Canada into the US have been complaining that they have had certain of their religious precepts breeched by Border security. Horribly intrusive things like asking a Muslim woman to remove her veil to show her face and confirm her identity. It’s just too much of an imposition. They are quick to shout “freedom of religion” and invoke the Forth Amendment’s prohibition against unreasonable search and seizure to protect their religiously required modesty.

Here’s a flash for those Muslims who want to be remained veiled on their drivers’ licenses, and who refuse to show their face to female Border Patrol agents: Your right to practice your religious delusion stops where it becomes a demand for special treatment not extended to people of other faiths or no faith at all. I can’t expect to cross the border into the US unchallenged wearing a Freddie Kruger mask, nor have my local DMV office put my preferred photo of me wearing a towel over my face on my driver’s license. Don’t want to expose your face? Don’t drive a car, and don’t attempt to enter/re-enter the country... problem solved.

Then there are the Sikhs whose male adherents are required by their religion to wear a ceremonial dagger at all times. They want to wear it on planes, in courthouses, and on public school property in violation of statues that prohibit the carrying of any weapons. If I can’t carry my secular pig sticker on a plane, their supernatural delusion and customs do not grant them a special pass to be armed.

If my own personal religion prevented me from being finger printed, it doesn’t excuse me from the practice in order to obtain security clearance, or a secure a pistol permit. My options are clear. Forego the job requiring security clearance and don’t carry a pistol concealed.

Look, religionists of foreign custom ... here’s the thing: You can walk around veiled, armed, and otherwise encumbered by your religious idiocy all you like. But when it comes down to being treated special and excused from common convention because of it that’s where accommodation of your religious rights come to a screeching halt.

If your god/ gods are going to be offended by you not wearing a knife for a few hours, or his briefs will get in a wad by your face being shown for thirty seconds, then you need to realize that you scraped the bottom of the belief system barrel and your imaginary god is an asshat. Find a new one. If your husband will have to kill you after the fact in order to protect his honor... you picked the wrong husband. Find another.

They have as much right to practice their religion as I have to not have religion, it’s all good. But the choice is theirs. They can adapt to this country’s culture, laws, and expectations of behavior, or forgo the benefits this country has to offer. Frankly, I don’t care which. Just shut up.

Mormons: More Equal than the Rest of Us?

2011-03-27T19:44:00.005-04:00

I don’t write often about non-mainstream religions and cults. I’ll do it when they make news, like when they kill themselves in a religious frenzy as is their want; or when they withhold medical assistance from their dying child. But since they have less of an impact on how science is taught in the schools, or how our freedoms are interpreted, and our government runs... I tend to not worry as much about them as I do mainstream religious denominations. However, something has come to my attention that makes me say: “What the fuck??”

TLC / The Learning Channel (as of late a rather ironic misnomer) airs a show called “Sister Wives.” This fundamentalist Mormon family living in Utah is comprised of three (possibly now four) women married to one man. They have in the neighborhood of thirteen kids. Being married to more than one woman in this country is called Bigamy. It’s illegal. Always has been.

Now personally, I don’t have real strong feelings about polygamy / bigamy. I’m not positive exactly why it is illegal, not sure who the victim is, and not entirely sure it should be illegal. It’s entirely possible that the Western marriage concept of one wife to one husband at a time is simply a religiously inspired convention. But let’s put that aside. The issue here is that polygamy is against the law and that this family is openly breaking the law of the land. They are doing so presumably to make money, and if you ask them, also to make some statement / point. I don’t give a damn what their point is.

Utah is infested with Mormons, many of whom belong to ultra-conservative offshoot sects of Mormonism that never gave up the practice of polygamy. These groups deem Brigham Young’s “Revelation from God” to stop the practice of multiple marriages a “false revelation.” Indeed, they are correct, but not for reasons they think. God didn’t hand down any instructions to old Brigham, God doesn’t exist. But the Federal government exists and it was THEIR revelation that Utah would never become a state until polygamy was abandoned by the Mormons. Miraculously, Brigham Young promptly received his instructions from God that polygamy was no longer sanctioned. Quite a coincidence.

In any state other state in the union this blatant demonstration of illegal activity would result in investigation, arrest and prosecution. But not in Utah. Oh, it’s illegal in Utah as well, but according to authorities there, there are so many polygamous families that they lack the resources to pursue them. Thus, they are ignored unless another crime, like child abuse or endangerment, raises the authorities’ antennae.

So while I would be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law should my wife agree to allow me to take Jennifer Anniston as a second wife (not a likely circumstance and the mention of which will likely cause me to be on the receiving end of significant spousal ire) Mormons get special treatment. They are ostensibly exempt from prosecution, because so many of them do it, or so the authorities say. But, if the excessive number of people breaking any given law negated the possibility of prosecution, no one would ever be arrested for smoking pot.

No, what’s happening in Utah, the adopted state of a cult whose founder was a convicted conman; the land of magic underwear, and the home of millions of future god’s of their own planets - is special treatment. A blind eye to illegality because the authorities are largely Mormon. It’s like having the inmates supervising the asylum.

No law enforcement agency, mayor, chief of police, state’s attorney, judge, or state legislator ... no one who holds elected office is about to start arresting and imprisoning the thousands of illegal Mormon bigamists whose votes put them into office, and whose tax money pays their salaries.

And so, Mormon’s get a pass as they thumb their nose at the law, breed kids like promiscuous possums, and teach their brood that this is right and good, guaranteeing another generation of religious nut polygamists.

I wonder how Jen and Mrs. Hump #1 would feel about living in Provo.

Catholic Church TV Ads: Something is Missing, Here’s What It Is

2011-03-22T20:34:00.004-04:00

Unless you’ve been very lucky, or unless the Catholic Church figured your area isn’t worth the effort from a cost benefit perspective, you’ve probably seen their slick new recruitment ads.

Stung by dwindling numbers of church going, money contributing faithful, the Church launched its “Come Home” campaign back in early February. It started in western state markets and seems to now be nation wide. There are three versions that tout the benefits of Catholicism and why lapsed Catholics ought come home.

Simple research on the internet shows that producing a 30 second TV commercial costs an average of $350,000 each. Then the airtime runs approximately $100,000 for each showing in a major market. It doesn’t take a financial genius to figure out the Church has spent millions of dollars with this slick new campaign.

Every time I see the ads I think about how many condoms that ad money could buy for third world AIDS ravaged nations on a bulk/wholesale basis. Or how many doses of pain medication could be given to Mother Teresa’s dying patients’ in India. Or how many mosquito nets it would buy for African’s infested with Malaria carrying mosquitoes. But I suppose the answer from the Catholic Church would be just like Jesus’ answer when Mary was criticized for given him that lube job with the expensive oils: “The poor will always be with us.”

But besides the money issue, the ads invariably evoke a feeling that something is missing. Something is being left out, omitted, and hidden. Maybe it’s just me, but every time I see theses ads, their praising of the Church’s role in creating the Bible, the good works they do, the sense of calm and comfort and family it offers, I just keep waiting for them to say something like this:

“We know that we have alienated many of our faithful by the illicit acts of our priests and those who oversee them. We understand that the responsibility is ours and ours alone and that we as your clergy are solely responsible for the pain we have caused; from the novice priest all the way to his Holiness the Pope.

We are now taking steps to unearth and expose every pervert priest, and every enabling Bishop and Cardinal. Nothing will be kept secret, no sensibilities will be spared. We will purge the church of those who have soiled its name, and defiled our beloved congregants. We will excommunicate the guilty and have them prosecuted to the fullest extent of the laws of each nation.

To those of you who have been practicing birth control against our doctrine, and/or who support abortion, it’s all good. From now on what you do with your genitals and reproductive organs is your business exclusively. It always should have been so. We are sorry for having been so fucking stupid for so fucking long.

To our gay and lesbian brothers and sisters - we now know we were wrong. We know it isn’t a choice, it’s just who you are. We know that the authors of the Bible were simply self-hating homophobic dicks. You are welcome, blessed and valued. We look forward to sanctifying your marriage unions as each state legalizes it. Heck, half the Church hierarchy is gay. The Vatican has its own leather bar.

And this is just the tip of the iceberg. Soon we will be announcing that this virgin birth, and original sin, and life after death, and resurrection stuff we’ve been pushing all these centuries is all a bunch of hooey. But you probably knew that already.

Come home to the Catholic Church, and be surprised by our truth, like we’ve never had the guts to tell it before.”

Gay Christians: Denial, Deception or Delusion?

2011-03-17T17:50:00.006-04:00

If there is one thing that the vast majority of heterosexual Christians agree on it’s that homosexuality is a sin. Of highly religious white Evangelicals 88% say homosexuality is a sin. 75% of Black Protestants say it’s a sin. Among Catholics the number is 64%. In all Christian denominations the higher the individual’s commitment to their religion (devoutness) the higher their intolerance for homosexuality. To say that Christianity overwhelmingly condemns homosexuality would be a gross understatement.
http://pewforum.org/PublicationPage.aspx?id=645#4

Thus, when my book The Atheist Camel Chronicles first came out I felt comfortable giving a signed copy to two gentlemen I befriended who sold and installed my underground dog fence. They are business partners and life partners. I had assumed that they’d share my perception of the ills of Christianity, since Christianity has had nothing good to say about them as gays.

Perhaps it’s that suppressed liberal bent in me, but I sort of expected a pat on the back from them for the chapters in the book that express my liberal perspective on homosexuality, equal rights and gay marriage. That never happened. Instead some many months later I discovered they were a little taken aback at my book’s anti-theist themes ... they both being Christians. [Note: Two lessons learned. 1- So much for stereotyping gays as freethinkers. It’s an erroneous assumption. 2- Expecting accolades for being tolerant and modernist in thought is rather, well ... pompous, condescending, self aggrandizing or something not very praise worthy].

This incident, and more recently my awareness of the larger gay Christian community, led me to question how gays can embrace a belief system that preaches against their lifestyle and sexual preference. How can they possibly reconcile their homosexuality with a scripture, a God, a clergy and congregants who see them as “not true Christians” at best and hell bound unrepentant sinners worthy of God’s condemnation and death by stoning at worst? The answers were at once surprising and yet absurdly predictable.

From what I can discern it boils down to three thought processes. The first is simply ignoring the issue of their sexuality entirely, denial. In this gay Christian website the faithful reiterate their love of Jesus, accept him as their savior, recognize the Bible as the word of God and anticipate salvation for their devotion. They just opt to ignore the Old Testament prescriptions for stoning and the traditional ostracizing and almost universal Christian condemnation of their sexual preference and life style. http://www.gaychristian.net/statementoffaith.php

Another tact is exemplified by a gay Christian organization that goes beyond cherry picking of scriptural verse, the tried and true Christian approach to using the Bible to support ones agenda. These people actually attempt to apply new meanings to Jesus’ words to transform his reference to “eunuch” in Matthew 19 to also mean “homosexual.” Thus, not only did Jesus not specifically condemn homosexuality, they imply he actually endorsed it. This may well be the most blatant example of dishonesty or delusion I’ve ever witnessed. http://www.gaychristian101.com/Homosexual-Eunuchs.html

They also embrace the entirely erroneous concept that that Jesus said he had come to dissolve the laws of the Old Testament. http://www.tobyjohnson.com/cause.html

Finally, there are the gay Christians who don’t attend church regularly, are not Bible literate and just ignore the acrimony of hetero Christians, the Bible and the Church leadership. Raised in Christian families, indoctrinated since childhood, they have taken on the identity of Christian from their parents. Never mind what the Bible and their fellow Christians say, they dismiss the homophobes as just acting independently; God makes no differentiation between gays and straights. In fact, it was God who made them gay thus he must approve. In essence they are arbitrarily redefining Christian doctrine. It’s feel good self deception.

It all boils down to the God Virus. Gays have no special immunity or antibodies for it. It doesn’t differentiate between gays and straights. Once infected with the God Virus it can disguise and distort reality. The ugly reality is that homophobia in the West is directly attributable to their God and the Judeo-Christian doctrine. The very reason for gay second class citizenship status is rooted in the Abrahamic God’s disgust for their sexual preference. But don’t bother telling that to them. Reason has always been the enemy of faith, and the faithful gay are no exception.

Christian Reconstructionism: The worst nightmare you’ve never heard of.

2011-03-12T17:56:00.003-05:00

I’ve been following the “hearings” in Washington on the radicalization of American Muslims. Rep. Peter King (R-NY) who masterminded the event is playing the role of McCarthy rather nicely. If his goal is to arouse fear and sough the seeds of mistrust of Muslim Americans it will likely have its desired impact, especially on Christian right wingers.

I’m not suggesting that there isn’t some degree of threat from fundamentalist Muslims, home grown or immigrants, who are compelled to rally to the terrorist’s cause. We’ve seen some recent examples of American Muslims turned traitor and murderer. But to people who are attuned to the evils of religious extremism American Muslims aren’t even a blip on the threat scale. There is a real and growing threat of nightmarish proportions to which most Americans are oblivious.

There’s a movement in the US that floats under the radar of most people. Few people in the public eye speak openly of it; even if they are themselves part of the movement. It’s called Christian Reconstructionism or Dominion Theology. What is it? Imagine your worst nightmare then multiply by it one-hundred fold.

Much as the ancient Hebrews did not separate their religious tenets from their ruling power, the Christian Reconstructionists (CRs) call for a total infusion of Christianity into government, law and private life. It’s a complete return to “God” in an effort to retake and save the Nation from secularism and free thought. It makes the fear of Shariah law laughable. It is the ultimate theocracy.

Under CR all secular law would be dissolved and replaced by the 613 laws of the Hebrew Bible. This includes stoning to death of disrespectful children; elimination of all positions of power held by women; homosexuality and bisexuality would be a capital crime as would adultery, blasphemy, working on the Sabbath and practicing witchcraft.

It goes down hill from there. Death sentences include execution by burning alive.
Some of the proponents of CR call for the banning of interracial marriage; slavery would be reinstated; all other religions would be banned, including the practice of Judaism. Most social programs would be dissolved including welfare and our public school system. Apostasy from Christianity would be punishable by death. The ultimate goal is to transform the entire globe to the “Kingdom of God” on Earth. You can read much more about this @ http://www.religioustolerance.org/reconstr.htm . Or just Google “Christian Reconstructionism”

I can hear some of my readers saying: “Come on Hump, you’re being an alarmist. There have always been crazies out there, why should we worry about a few fringe religious whackos?” And they’d be right if I were raising the flag of imminent disaster. I’m not. But it is receiving support from the fringe elements of the Charismatic Christian denominations, Pentecostals and Baptists of whom a growing number of politicians are adherents.

While it is not an immediate threat keep this in mind:

- In 2000 the Republican Party of Texas declared that it "affirms that the United States is a Christian nation."

- In 2004 CR leaders in congress introduced a bill in both houses (HR 3788 and S 2082) called The Constitution Restoration Act of 2004. The bill intended to limit the U.S. Supreme Court and federal courts’ ability to hear and rule on cases involving “expressions of religious faith by elected or appointed officials.”

Among the sponsors of the bill were Rep. Robert Aderholt (Alabama), Rep. Michael Pence (Indiana), Sen. Richard Shelby of Alabama, Sen. Zell Miller (Georgia), Sen. Sam Brownback (Kansas), and Sen. Lindsey Graham (South Carolina).

- James DeWeese a county court judge from Ohio who has three times attempted to defy court rulings banning his posting of the Ten Commandments in his court room calling them the “Rule of Law” is an avowed CR. In fact Roy Moore, a Chief Justice of the Alabama Supreme Court, was the initiator of the Constitution Restoration Act of 2004.

- The Washington DC secret Christian organization known as The Fellowship Foundation, AKA “the Family” AKA the “C Street” folks is a far right religious group who calls among its members many high ranking Congressmen and Senators. They sponsor the annual National Prayer Breakfast, are activists in breaking down the “Wall of Separation” between church and state, and hold strong Christian Reconstructionist positions.

This is just the tip of the iceberg. While the likes of Pat Robertson, Billy Graham and their ilk are open theocratic advocates, it’s the elected officials who will not readily identify their extremist religious views that we have to be wary of. You can be assured that every time you hear an elected official speak of “the US as a Christian Nation”; “bringing God back into our country“; “the devout Christianity of our Founding Fathers”; “the term ‘Wall of Separation’ is not in the Constitution”; and other key phrases that their objectives are suspect at best, theocratically motivated at worst.

The nightmares produced by our subconscious can be intense, but none are as hideous as the concept of a nation guided by Christian Reconstructionist politicians and judges. The zombies from the Night of the Living Dead may want to eat your brain, but at least they don’t want to enslave your mind and body.

Predictable and Transparent Christians - an invaluable resource

2011-03-07T20:05:00.007-05:00

An atheist facebook friend suggested that I read The Mythmaker: Paul and the Invention of Christianity by Hyam MacCoby, a Talmudic scholar. I went to amazon.com and began to peruse some of the many reader reviews both good and bad.

I am well aware that amazon reader reviews are no guarantee of a book’s value. But when it comes to books that are critical of religion I have developed an almost fool proof way of using reviews to guide my purchasing decision.

The following is an excerpt from a 1 star review of MacCoby’s book penned by a Christian. I found it invaluable.

“It would be easier to believe the "scholarship" of a book like this were it not for the blatant bias of the author."

"It uses similar logic to those who find by random out of context selection of verses the Bible a champion of suicide. [i.e.] 1) Judas hanged himself. 2) Go thou and do likewise. 3) what thou doest, do quickly. All [are] verses found in the Bible, but hardly the message really found there."

"You would be better off reading Evidence That Demands a Verdict by Josh McDowell, a skeptic who became convinced, rather than a proponent of a point of view slanting "evidence" to fit his viewpoint. Don't waste your money.”

Read that last sentence again. Note the assumption made by this Christian reviewer - a "skeptic who became convinced (became a believer)" is by definition less likely to "slant evidence" to fit his viewpoint and agenda than someone who doesn't hold Christian belief. What’s the basis for that inference? By my experience there is none. It's simply the Christian reviewer’s prejudice toward non-Christians.

It’s the hallmark of desperate Christian apologists to extol the virtues of those "skeptics who became believers," as though they hold a special ability to convince thinking people to abandon their intellect and reason and fall dumbly into mindless superstition. They roll out the Lee Strobels, C.S. Lewis' and McDowells and put them on pedestals because their self-professed (and often phony) conversion to religiosity justifies and strengthens their own beliefs. It seems avid religionists, conspiracy theorists and the deluded love company and what better company to be in than those who "once were lost and now are found” as the song goes.

Anyway ... as far as the "message(s)" found in the Bible - its message has been interpreted in hundreds of different ways. I don’t think it’s a surprise to anyone when I say that my multiple readings of the Bible reinforced my non-belief . Its message disgusted me in its irrationality, contradictions, absurdly illogical admonishments, myth presented as scientific "fact," obsession with death, and its grotesque examples of god endorsed baseness, threat, intolerance and violence. The fact that the Christian reviewer drew an entirely different message from the Bible is precisely the point of MacCoby’s work. But that is totally lost on him.

There are a number of 1 star and 5 star reviews for this book that were well reasoned. So well reasoned that I was on the fence as to whether or not I would buy this work. But this reviewer’s almost palatable anger and his warning away predicated on his own prejudice and personal agenda has convinced me to make the purchase and assess it for myself. For that, I thank him.

Bottom line: when considering a book critical of their religion let the angry Christian reviewer guide your purchase. They rarely steer you right.

We have a religious hypocrite for President, and I hope he’s re-elected

2011-03-02T20:07:00.003-05:00

The National Prayer Breakfast is an event held annually in Washington and sponsored by Christian evangelical fanatics in government, most notably “The Family” aka The K Street gang. That club is comprised of Republican politicians who see their political role as spreading the word of Jesus.

President Obama attended his first Prayer Breakfast in 2009. There he gave a speech that was ecumenical in nature, non-religious and clearly intended to be healing and inspiring without being overtly religious. Here is a very brief extract from his 2009 address to the attendees. :

“... far too often, we have seen faith wielded as a tool to divide us from one another – as an excuse for prejudice and intolerance. Wars have been waged. Innocents have been slaughtered. For centuries, entire religions have been persecuted, all in the name of perceived righteousness.”

“There is no doubt that the very nature of faith means that some of our beliefs will never be the same. We read from different texts. We follow different edicts. We subscribe to different accounts of how we came to be here and where we're going next – and some subscribe to no faith at all.”

http://www.nytimes.com/2009/02/05/us/politics/05text-prayer.html

Two years later President Obama had a different message. This year, in early February, he discarded his designer suit and donned his hair shirt. He took off his hand made cordovan oxfords opting instead for Jesus sandals. And he carried in his hand not the torch of freedom, but a shepherd’s crook and a Bible. Here are some extracts from his 2011 address to the attendees;

"I came to know Jesus Christ for myself and embrace him as my Lord and savior."

"My Christian faith, then, has been a sustaining force for me over these last few years, all the more so when Michelle and I hear our faith questioned from time to time,"
"When I wake in the morning, I wait on the Lord, and I ask him to give me the strength to do right by our country and its people, and when I go to bed at night, I wait on the Lord, and I ask him to forgive me my sins and look after my family and the American people and make me an instrument of his will."

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2011/02/03/AR2011020302769.html

So what’s happened here? Has the President become born again Xtian over the past two years? Has he come to Jesus, seen the Light? Hell no, he’s too intelligent for that nonsense. The bottom line is he has been stung by criticism for his lack of public religiosity and by the continued undertone of rumors of his Islamic belief which is still accepted as fact by millions of the faithful.

Most Christians see atheists as unworthy to hold office. The Pew Forum survey of 2009 showed Christians would sooner vote for a homosexual or Muslim for president than for an atheist. And we all know how a very large number of Christians feel about those two groups. It wasn’t all that long ago that George Bush Senior referred to atheists as "... not patriots and possibly not even Americans." That perspective is shared by many Christians.

Obama’s new found religious fervor is a product of the criticism and doubts cast by religionists; it’s a way for him to blunt the Muslim accusation nonsense, but it's also a way for him to establish he isn't a non-believer, either of which would be the kiss of death in 2012. Am I disappointed he doesn't just out himself; just admit he’s agnostic; declare that religion is fine for some but isn’t important to him, of which I am largely convinced is the fact based on subtleties of things said and promises made (and broken) before his election ? Yes, I am disappointed. Yes, it’s hypocrisy.

But the religious virus is so deep in this country that for him to continue to stone wall the demand for declaring his Christianity would be political suicide. He has to play the game lest that famous "Christian love and tolerance" guarantee him to be a one term President.

I’m a realist. I'd rather see him dance the dance, play the game and sell his dignity and credibility to satisfy the Christian majority than to be counted out of the race before it begins and watch a real K Street Gang member take the presidency. If that makes me a hypocrite as well, I can live with it for the next six years.

The Curse of Modernism, Rationality and Atheism

2011-02-23T18:17:00.006-05:00

"Modernism and Rationality had its reign at the top and what do we see? School systems failing, suicides increasing, unliveable [sic] inner cities, and to add insult to injury: post-modernism has arrived; everything a product of aethism, [sic] thank you very much. "

This insightful comment was offered up by a religionist who has reached his tolerance level with the evil secularism of the modern world. Satan used to be blamed for the world’s ills, but now it’s this curse of modernism. Atheists are the New Satan.

If only this Christian had himself fallen victim to a touch of rationality maybe he’d have tempered his fervor and looked at things a tad more broadly. The following was my attempt to help him in that endeavor:

Dear Hand Wringing Xtian,

Mississippi is the most religious state in the nation . Over 90% of its citizens have total belief in God. What has their devotion to God and lack of rationalism brought them? Mississippi is blessed with among the highest unemployment, lowest education level, highest crime, highest teen pregnancies and highest poverty rate in the nation. Interestingly New Hampshire is tied for least religious /most secular state in the nation and our ratings in those indices are exactly the opposite of Mississippi's. So much for the postive effects of theism on society

Perhaps you think things are much better in the theocracy of Iran where religious dictators reign supreme, modernism is reviled and atheism is a crime? Or in the Vatican where money laundering and institutionalized child molestation cover-up is rampant; and where denial of the efficacy of condoms is complicit in the deaths of millions in the third world? Or in some African nations where the new Christian zealotry is resulting in modern day witch burnings and the wholesale execution of homosexuals? I don't know, maybe that's your vision of the good life.

I suppose you'd like our society to be the way things were when religion was the predominant force in society -the Dark Ages, the Inquisition and the Crusades. The Church had “its reign at the top” in those days and what was the product of that reign? Church sanctioned anti-Semitism and the propagation of “inner city” ghettos; unbridled genocide; dictatorial control over education, the banning of free thought, death for questioning the inerrent "Truths" of the Church; wholesale murder of innocents who were branded as “heretics” and “witches;” the imprisonment of scientists or threat of same; centuries of religious wars that made today’s jihads and intifada’s look like a day at Disney World.

Without secularism's rational thinking, reason, logic and dedication to reality your life span would still be what it was in the 12th century - and you'd likely be dead by now; or you'd be busy praying to God to save your ass from the wrath of his / Satan’s plagues (i.e. Polio, Leukemia, bacterial infections, draught, pneumonia, et al).

So, here are a a couple of recommendations for you: A) Think before you type, if you are at all capable of such a thing. B) Thank our Founding Fathers' modernism and rationality and the overwhelmingly non-believing scientists for your freedoms, health, comfort, well fed fat ass, relative safety and the fact that 30%- 50% of your offspring will not die in childhood.

Reflect on that then get back to me and let me know how you think modernity compares to life under Pope Urban II and Pope Gregory IX.

Redefining God out of Fear and Desperation

2011-02-18T16:50:00.004-05:00

I was reading the Huffington Post and came across an article from Jeffery Small, an author and contributor to the Post. Jeff has come to realize that the image of the old man in the sky God just isn’t sustainable anymore. The guy who watches everything we do, and influences the world, and listens to your prayers for the Cubs to win the World Series and rejects it constantly, none of this holds water anymore. Science killed that old dude.

But that’s not the end of the story. Just because the god of his parents has been offed doesn’t mean Jeff is ready to abandon fantasy. Not by a long shot. Jeff absolutely needs a god. And if the Judeo-Christian God concept doesn’t work, then damnit, he’ll redefine god.
To get a flavor of his reasoning (such as it is) and the new age gibberish that ensues, here are some choice extracts from the article :

“Unlike the age of the Biblical writers, we live in a world ruled by science, technology and secular thought ... we understand that our world is governed by physical laws from the subatomic realm to the cosmic, so where do we find room for God to act? Is God still relevant ?”
“God as the potter, the watchmaker or the chess master has lost its relevance for many in our post-modern world.”

So far so good. Then ...

"How can we conceive of God today in a way that is honest to our intellects while satisfying to our hearts?"

“I do not see God as a separate being, but rather God is the center of being within me and everything around me.”

“God must not just be consistent with scientific and rational thought but must embrace it. I have come to understand God, not as a transcendent Zeus-like figure, but instead as the infinite creative source of existence.”

“I’ll pose a question ... What symbols or metaphors might we use to open our minds to a new way of thinking about God that works in the 21st century?”
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/jeffrey-small/reimagining-god-in-the-21_b_822776.html

As long as he asked I felt compelled to comment on Jeff’s proposition. Here is my response:

So basically what your saying, Jeff, is that since the "god of the gaps" has been reduced to a shadow of its former self, you now have to invent, devise, create and otherwise conjure a new kind of god that fits in with discovery reality and 21st century science; as though that's less absurd than a bearded psychotic in the sky, or a dead Jew on a stick, or Ganesh the four armed elephant god. It isn't. It's simply more imaginary mental masturbation, and just as meaningless.

The old model god too hard to maintain? Not worth trying to repair? Outlived its usefulness? Might as well cut your loses and find a newer model that’ll satisfy your craving for something spooky somewhere, eh?

Here's a thought: be a big boy Jeff - try dealing with the natural world with out wishing and hoping and conjecturing a supernatural, disembodied creator force or something indescribably delicious to replace the defunct God image. Try reality. I know it sounds terribly frightening to someone who has always clung to some form of spookdom, but you can do it. Just keep repeating “I think I can, I think I can ....”

As for your question as to symbols for a new way of thinking about God - how about a big steaming pile of equine fecal matter. Or an empty glass.

Cults: Scraping the Bottom of the Spiritual Barrel

2011-02-13T16:28:00.002-05:00

"I was in a cult for 34 years. Everyone else could see it. I don't know why I couldn't... "

The above is a quote from Paul Haggis; Oscar winning movie director and thirty-four year devotee of the Church of Scientology. His story as to why he left the church as well as some choice bad mouthing of the church hierarchy appeared in New Yorker magazine this week. He expects fall out since the good folks who run Scientology don’t tolerate apostates well, and have long memories.

I imagine Haggis’ quote is uttered at sometime or other by every cult escapee. Why couldn’t he / they see what the rest of us could? What draws otherwise intelligent, productive and mentally stable people to devote their lives; donate their fortunes; accept isolation from not cultist family members; and accept the most transparently bizarre claims of known charlatans, madman and spiritual fanatics? There are a number of theories espoused by psychiatric medical professionals that purport to explain this phenomenon. I won’t rehash them here.

But what’s important is this: that same statement of incredulity made by Haggis could be and likely has been uttered by every escapee from any cult, religion, or spiritual community. After all, what makes a cult different than a religion? Typically the answer is the size of the group’s bank account and cash flow. And what makes an eastern ascetic guru who is credited by his adherents with having vast knowledge and insights and thus can provide them with a path to unique spiritual knowledge different from praying to a disembodied man-god to give one health, wealth and guidance; or asking some priest for forgiveness through penance? Not much.

The Romans perceived early Christians as cultists. No doubt main stream Christian sects would take umbrage with that label now. That can be attributed to their lack of understanding of the word which in fact defines the three major religions precisely.

On the other hand those same Christians are quick to dismiss Jehovah’s Witnesses, Mormon, Santeria, Christian Science and other offshoots of Christianity as cults, using the word as an epithet - just as they all (indeed we all) dismiss Scientology as a cult. Never do they see their own “... particular system of religious worship, especially with reference to its rites and ceremonies.” as a cult. http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/cult

I’ll admit to a similar prejudice, albeit for different reasons. I tend to reserve the term cult to describe all new age “higher power / enlightenment seeking” movements and all of the 19th century Christian hybrid religions. I have no basis for that, since Catholicism and the protestant sects are as well defined as cults as are any of them according to definition. But I justify the difference because by the 19th century, and certainly by the 20th, the progression of human experience should have by now rendered the invention of new nonsensical, non-material, irrational movements obsolete.

One could almost [note I said almost] forgive mainstream religionists for accepting Bronze Age,1st century, and 7th century supernaturalism. Developed by primitive thinking peoples and ingrained into succeeding generations by indoctrination it’s a virus that spreads and sustains itself. But I can’t even feign anything approaching understanding for people who embrace modernistic supernatural fictions, fallacies, frauds and fantasy. They have abandoned ancient pre-scientific ignorance and blind faith, replacing it with a modern version of stupidity.

Dig into the dross at the bottom of the barrel of religion, and just below the scum layer of fundamentalist religionists you’ll find cultists.

Abandoning Reason for Ratings: What’s Happening to Educational TV?

2011-02-08T15:38:00.009-05:00

Something has happened to those television programs that once were the bastions of intellectual curiosity and learning. They seem to have run out of genuine historical events, scientific discovery and meaningful learning, opting to fill their programming schedule with religiously based bullshit.

“Science of the Bible,” “Angels: Good or Evil?”, “History of the Bible,” “Science of the Soul,” are a few of the titles presented by The History Channel, History International, The Learning Channel, and the Discovery Channel. The Discovery Channel is going one step further, teaming up with the Vatican to create an exorcism reality show.

All of them purport to be educational, but in airing these programs they are exactly the opposite of education. They breed ignorance by promoting opinion and/or fallacious “evidence” as fact or viable possibility. They blend science with religious faith and attempt to use it to support myth. They give credence to absurdities simply by lending their once credible reputations to pseudo-science, distortions, and make believe. And they confuse the hell out of the less discerning and intellectually deprived.

Last night out of curiosity I forced myself to watch “Science of the Soul.” The primary interviewee was the religion editor of a national magazine who clearly was a religionist or “spiritual person” - whatever that means. She traced the origins of the concept of soul to pre-Xtian Greeks, then to it’s perception in Christian doctrine. She then descended into speculative quasi-scientific horse hockey. So much for history or science.

The only “science” presented was referencing a doctor who, in the early 1900’s, measured the weight of five people as they lay dying. Upon their death four of the five showed no change in weight. The fourth showed a weight loss of 21 grams, which the good doctor presumed to be evidence of the “soul” leaving the body. Naturally, the four with no change were dismissed.

That was in 1910 and it was the only “scientific” (if you could even call it that, I can’t) study of the soul concept. Yet this woman kept referring to science’s never ending quest to find the soul. No such scientists’ names or work were presented; at least not in the 30 minutes I could bare to watch this idiocy. And how could there be, since no self respecting accredited scientist is going to waste his time or grant money chasing ghosts, ghouls, gods, or souls.

On another show they parked a fan powered air boat on shore and position it so as to blow its high speed fan into a pond to demonstrate how the wind “could indeed” have parted the Red Sea per Exodus. A recent episode proffered that a giant asteroid or meteor shower could have been the cause of destruction for Sodom, Gomorrah and surrounding villages. What ... aliens shooting death rays isn't plausible? Please.

What’s next: the “science” of how gamma rays and electrical current mixed with the injection of alien DNA could have resurrected a three day dead corpse? Or perhaps an archeological dig at the official Garden of Eden; tracing the blood line of Satan; or reconstructing the talking donkey’s genealogy (Numbers 22)?

The only explanation I can come up with to explain the pimping of superstition by these otherwise credible programs is ratings. If they can’t attract an audience with real science, real history, genuine educational programming, they will prostitute their good name and appeal to the lowest common denominator: half witted, gullible biblical literalists who will gobble it up and say “See its true, scientists say so, I saw it on the History Channel!!”

And we wonder why American students rank 17th in the world in math and science; why 90% of high school students don’t know about the Spanish American War; or who John Adams was, or that Jefferson coined the phrase “Wall of Separation.” Here’s just one more reason.

Thanks History Channel.

Child Manslaughter is Almost Legal in the US, If You're a Christian

2011-02-03T18:28:00.007-05:00

In 2009 Herbert and Catherine Schaible watched their helpless two year old son die of pneumonia. They didn't watch as emergency room doctors used their medical training and modern pharmaceuticals to try and save the boy, they couldn't because they never sought professional help. Instead, they prayed over the boy, asking God to heal him as he wasted away and succumbed to this treatable disease.

The Schaible's are members of the First Century Gospel Church of Philadelphia, PA. They perceive using medical aid as a lack of confidence in God. They believe in faith healing exclusively. If this was the first century I'd understand their ignorance and dependence on the supernatural, they'd have had few other choices. I cannot, I will not accept this as anything less than voluntary manslaughter. The courts agreed.

However, today the sentencing judge gave them a virtual pass. Instead of holding them accountable, emphatically establishing that society will not tolerate the death of a child who is at the mercy of his parents, the parents were given probation and made to promise they will seek medical help for their remaining seven children should they fall ill. Period.

What is the message this sentence sends? That if you have belief in a the god of Abraham as a healing agent then allowing a child to drown in his chest fluids who could have been saved isn't all that bad. Oh, it wasn't a good thing it's just not as bad as watching as your kid drown in a bathtub. So, go about your business; continue to think and act like a first century cultist; raise your kids in this archaic superstitious faith so they too may some day kill their kids with prayer. Go, and sin no more.

I wonder had it been a voodoo practicing family who depended on incantations, eye of newt, chants and magic smoke to heal and their child succumbed, would the judge have been so forgiving? I doubt it. One can only guess what would happen to an atheist who would watch a kid die while reciting from a Carl Sagan book: "That's right your honor, I put my confidence in Sagan's ability to heal my child ... problem?"

After their sentencing Mr. Schaible said this: "With God's help, this will never happen again." With god's help?! For Christ sake man ... it was the lack of help from your non-existent God that convinced you to kill your kid in the first place!! So much for any lessons learned by this sentence. http://www.kansascity.com/2011/02/02/2627109/philly-couple-who-prayed-over.html#ixzz1CwYzP8hj

This is 21st century America where the death of a child at the hands of their parents is treated like a first time shop lifting conviction just so long as you're Christian and sufficiently deluded. A pox on them, their church and that judge.

Deicide is Dead: Long Live “Faithicide”

2011-01-29T15:59:00.009-05:00

Deicide –noun
1. a person who kills a god.
2.the act of killing a god.

I’ve occasionally pondered the word deicide. It’s a peculiar concept. Killing something that doesn’t exist isn’t a new idea, but from what I can tell it’s the only act of fictional character killing that has its own definition.

You never hear anyone accuse Dr. Abraham van Helsing, the protagonist of
Bram Stoker’s Dracula, of committing “Vampire-icide,” nor is the word in the dictionary. Besides, how powerful can a god be if it is can be killed by its own creations? There is nothing in scripture that indicates god is susceptible to kryptonite or the like..

No. The word makes zero sense. It should be dropped from the English lexicon, just like Webster’s did back in 1949 by deleting some words that were two-hundred years old and out of common usage. In its place I recommend “faithicide”- which connotes the erosion of theism by the advancement of science, reason, discovery, and intelligent discourse. It’s not a new word. It has been used informally for a few years. But it’s time has come for formal recognition and common usage.

We are all complicit in “faithicide.”

Every time Dawkins, Hitchens, Harris, Dennette, Price, Ray, Ehrman, et al publish one of their books, faith is being killed.

Every time a freethinking organization posts an atheist display next to a Christmas display; or each time a bus rolls by with an anti-religion / pro free thought message on it’s side, faith is being destroyed.

Each time a secular watchdog organization challenges religious intrusions into our lives, faith is executed.

Each time an atheist blog is posted, a debate initiated, or a religionist letter to the editor is rebutted by a freethinker, faith is assassinated.

With each new scientific discovery faith is extinguished.

The erosion of theism in the modern world isn't happening by itself. It was cajoled, convinced, pushed, shoved and forced kicking and screaming into its continuing insignificance in the industrialized (read: educated) world. Faith’s impotence as a means to an end, as a moral standard, as an explanation for the natural world has been exposed.

“Faithicide” deserves its place in our language and in our dictionaries. Definition: Killing Religion with Reason One Superstition at a Time.

Inevitably our practice of “faithicide” will succeed. There won’t be any final deathblow; faith’s ultimate demise will come slowly ... a death of a thousand cuts of reason. When that happens all that will remain to be done is to kick dirt over the unholy grave of religiosity and that will be when Webster can expunge “faithicide" from its pages.

“This country was founded on Christian Ideals and Values!” Such as ...??

2011-01-24T09:22:00.003-05:00

We’ve heard that phrase posited by right wing Xtian politicians and their faithful religious supporters for years. But exactly what does it mean? Likely not what they think.

While the first immigrants to this continent were in fact Xtian, suggesting that the Pilgrims' et al belief system was the basis for the "foundation" of what would later become our nation would be like saying that the 13th century invasion of the Mongol hordes into Europe resulted in Poland being founded on "Mongolian ideals." Or that Scandinavian countries were founded on Viking pagan ideals.

Anyone who insists this country is founded on the Ten Commandments hasn't read the Ten Commandments (any of the multiple Biblical versions of them), or hasn’t compared them to our Constitution. Anyone who says that this country was founded on "Christian Values" (whatever they are) just needs to explain what "values" this country has that are defined in the Xtian bible that is unique to Xtianity and which have been codified in our laws.

Perhaps they will offer burning witches as a Xtian value. Certainly the Bible endorses that, and certainly thousands of colonists were killed as witches by Xtians. If so then absolutely that particular Xtian value was embraced in the 17th century by Xtians of this continent.

If enslavement and genocide of indigenous peoples is a Xtian ideal, then yes it too was widely practiced here.

If anti-Semitism and intolerance of other sects and religions, is a Xtian value, then indeed that value was embraced in the 17th century and forward by our early Xtian residents.

If trying to force people to honor the Xtian god by imposing blasphemy laws that fine, imprison or kill for their violation, then yes, that particular Xtian ideal was observed here as well.

Xtians may well stake their claim to those ideals and values. They are welcome to them. But nothing in our Constitution or in the Common Law (derived from pre-Xtian Anglo Saxon common law) speaks to Xtian "values" or infers any Xtian dogma, doctrine, or rituals. Freedom of speech is NOT a Xtian value. Nor is freedom of religion, nor the right to vote, nor granting private ownership of firearms, nor determining who is qualified to hold office, nor is the abolition of slavery, nor is the concept of equality. Jesus never spoke on these issues or endorsed them. And they sure weren't universally practiced in Christian Europe.

This country was a unique and bold experiment. It was founded upon rational thought, democratic principles, and our Founding Fathers’ explicit intent to avoid the “Christian ideals and values” that are the very antithesis of rationality and which enslaved Europe for nine-hundred years. For any person to say otherwise exposes them as deluded, an undereducated buffoon, a lying history revisionist or all of the above.

Surrendering the High Ground: The Pitfall of Religious Debate

2011-01-17T17:37:00.008-05:00

Religionist : “Everybody has a chance to go to heaven , if they ask Jesus to forgive their sin.”
Atheist: "Jesus forgiving your sins means nothing if the person you sinned against doesn't forgive you."

I witnessed this exchange between religionist and atheist recently. I imagine that to many of us it reads like reasonable discourse and debate between two people with opposing perceptions of reality. But that’s because we have been raised in a culture where the dominant religion’s words of the absurd have become accepted and common place. In fact the atheist has already surrendered the debate high ground by accepting the challenge on the religionist’s terms.

In his effort to inject reason to counter a basic proselytizing platitude, the freethinker inadvertently validated the legitimacy of the Xtian’s proposal. He did so four times.
First, by granting the Xtian’s premise of the existence of an imaginary Man-god; second, by imbuing that imaginary being with the ability to grant forgiveness; third, by allowing the reference to gaining entry into a fictional place of afterlife to be established as a valid concern; and fourth by accepting the concept of “sin” as a meaningful term in secular parlance where any forgiveness is needed.

Jesus forgiving your sins means every bit as much to the thinking as Jean Val jean, Sherlock Holmes, or Baal forgiving one’s sins. Thus, seeking such forgiveness is absurd at face. So why propose that the fictional god figure’s forgiveness “... means nothing IF...” ? It means nothing, period!

That we may use the word sin in normal discourse to mean an ethical lapse is indicative of our evolving language. But religionists see the word very differently. "Sin" is a man made convention predicated on committing transgressions that violate a supernatural being's prohibitions or edicts causing him/her/it displeasure. Thus, since the very concept of sin is fallacious it negates any need for forgiveness from anything or anyone.

Unless this atheist has concerns about entry to paradise after death; or is worried about offending an imaginary supernatural being’s sensibilities; or he accepts that not keeping the Sabbath holy is a “sin” necessitating a spirit’s forgiveness (any of which by the definition of atheist make no sense) ... his tack is ill conceived. The proper strategy would be to reject the theist’s premise; explain that by virtue of one’s reasoned thinking the proposal is as meaningless; and point them to greener pastures like Scientologists or Muslims.

When evangelicals propose salvation to an atheist they are doing so out of the belief that atheists are simply being stubborn. They have already rejected the fact of our non-belief, considering it simply a defect that proselytizing and testimony can repair. That’s hardly the time to take their bait.

Twenty-six hundred years ago Sun Tzu taught that one doesn’t intentionally allow their opponent to draw one into battle where the enemy has the terrain that is most advantageous to their strategy … no matter how primitive their weapons, or weak their minds.

When atheist Reason succumbs to hysteria we become like Them

2011-01-12T19:08:00.005-05:00

The hideous mass killings and attempted assassination of a congresswoman in
Tucson, Arizona last week has created hysteria and knee jerk reactionary response from people from whom I would have least expected it. Perhaps my disappointment is my own fault as I tend to credit freethinkers with using the same reasoned approach to all issues and events, more credit than we apparently deserve.

Over the course of the past few days I received numerous invitations to join causes and pages on Facebook entitled “Prosecute Palin for Incitement to Murder” and “Remove Palin from Facebook.” Curious, I visited those pages and read some outlandishly speculative comments that were proffered as fact; comments so filled with rhetorical hyperbole, so incendiary and worst of all so unsubstantiated that had the people positing them been religionists I’d simply have shaken my head and said: “Typical.”

But these were largely freethinkers, atheists—people who dismiss the supernatural because they demand objective evidence; honor fact not conjecture; and hold rational thought in high regard, or so I thought.

“The shooter is a Teabagger!”; “This was all part of a well conceived Right Wing plan!” ; “Palin knew this was going to happen!”; “She broke the law and is guilty of conspiracy to murder!”; “We should change the laws for high profile people to hold them accountable for words that kill!”; “She went beyond free speech, like yelling Fire in a crowded theater!” When questioned as to the foundational evidence for these statements no substantiations were offered. The pyre was already stacked, the match struck, all they needed was the witch to be delivered to them.

I suggested examination of Brandenburg vs Ohio and Watts vs The United States to better understand the criteria for incitement to murder. Palin’s gun related rhetoric which appeals to her base and is part of her persona, and the crosshair target imagery do not even vaguely approach that criteria. The critical element being that direct intent to cause harm has to be proven and that mere hyperbole, humor, or offensive methods of stating political opposition are protected under the Constitution. I implored them not to confuse legal accountability, with the unethical/insensitive political discourse we all rightly and roundly condemn.

This wasn’t received well.

Never mind that my expressed disdain for the far right in general and Palin in specific are well documented. That I condemned her hate filled and inflammatory speech as ill advised and bad for the nation was not enough. My call for rational thinking was largely ignored, worse, it was taken as evidence of my right wing leanings and proof that I am a Palinist. I was summarily “unfriended” by at least one Facebook “friend.”

In the midst of all this I received this email from an atheist organization in the Southwestern US:

“The WBC [ Westboro Baptist Church] has added another irony as a right-wing extremist took the lifes [sic] of 6 people wounding 14 more (including Gabby Gifford) will be given hero status by this sick group. If you're in the area please do go to these funerals and help the blockade that will keep the evil of the right-wing out.”

I emailed the group’s organizer, commended her efforts to blunt Fred Phelps’ despicable plan, and asked for her evidence of the shooter’s “right-wing extremist” credentials. She replied she had none, but it was obvious. I explained that the right is claiming he was a far leftist, also without evidence. When I suggested that her inventive labeling of this maniac -- who could as well be far left, Independent, anarchist, or simply apolitical but deranged -- could damage her and her organization’s credibility she said this:

“Of course they're saying he's not one of them. That's how they twist things. Why does associating him with the right threaten my credibility? The right associating him with the left only strengthens theirs”. ...” I think that [picketing Fred Phelps’ demonstration] is a legitimate project for atheists who claim they are also humanists. If my credibility is hurt in the process of getting some action, so be it.”

Let me paraphrase her comment:

“... let truth and fact be damned; if they can posit conjecture as fact so can we; the means justifies the end; and besides what harm would it do, if I told a good strong lie for the sake of the cause? A lie out of necessity, a useful lie, a helpful lie, such lies would not be wrong.”

If that last phrase sounds vaguely familiar to you, kudos. You probably read the chapter in The Atheist Camel Chronicles that discusses the Church’s endorsement of lying for the faith. Here’s the actual quote:

"What harm would it do, if a man told a good strong lie for the sake of the good and for the Christian church ... a lie out of necessity, a useful lie, a helpful lie, such lies would not be against God, he would accept them." - Martin Luther, in a letter in Max Lenz, ed., Briefwechsel Landgraf Phillips des Grossmüthigen von Hessen mit Bucer, vol. I.)

The lesson here is that the rationality that permits atheists’ rejection of myth doesn’t always translate into clear and measured thinking when facing broader real world applications. Under emotional duress hysteria displaces reason and the ensuing justification for abandonment of truth and fact reads as despicably as it does from a religionist’s pen. Lesson learned.

Bye Bye Black Bird … Hellloooo Jesus!

2011-01-06T19:52:00.005-05:00

Over the past week bird and fish kills have been reported in Arkansas, Louisiana, Maryland, Sweden, and Australia among a few other places. Thousands of black birds falling from the sky battered and beaten, fish and crabs washing up on coast lines and river banks have got scientists baffled. But not the super religious, no siree. The supernaturally befuddled have it all figured out-- it’s a sign of the End Times, Jesus is coming!

You knew it would come to this. I would have been disappointed if it hadn’t. But when I heard reports of these natural kill events on the news I had assumed that the usual suspects would be crawling out of their Bentleys and McMansions to proclaim that these are the prophesized early signs that the End Times were imminent (“...oh, and by the way, send in your $20.00 prayer offering and receive your sacred washcloth before it’s too late”.) I guess they've cried wolf so many times, and have said so many moronic things that they decided to sit this one out.

Instead the lead is being taken by amateur fundie prophets of doom who are working themselves into a frenzy quoting biblical verse and offering careful analysis, explanations, advice and warnings. These quotes from a blog site are typical of the hysteria.

Justin said: “This could be a message from god that he is coming back soon. Or it could be the forces of the antichrist in Washington controlling our leaders, which are causing these things as well. The antichrist will give great signs and wonders on the earth and the heaven. hence UFO's, Dead Birds, Dead Fish, Weird Weather Patterns, Strange earthquakes, etc. The antichrist is here, and will reveal himself shortly, ...”

Ed said: “Fast and pray, fast and pray, then fast some more, then pray and fast and pray. Pray some more, then fast and pray... New world order is thinning out the bird pop so there will be less to feed on them when Jesus commands them to attack.”
http://www.examiner.com/cultural-oddities-in-national/dead-birds-and-fish-bible-prophecy-web-searches-explode

Certainly these are entirely plausible explanations -- if you are Xtian, insane and Republican. Meanwhile verses from Revelations and Zachariah about birds and fish being killed off as a prelude to end times are being thrown around faster than Hello Kitty underpants at a Justin Bieber concert.

Scientists are still investigating the possible causes and haven't the answers yet. This is in and of itself further proof to these purveyors of ignorance that Jesus’ return is just around the corner. After all, if scientists don’t know the cause the default answer obviously has to be supernatural.

And in case that isn't convincing enough they are quick to point to the wars, the diseases, the earthquakes and tornadoes that we read about every day ... all of them prophesized in the bible as the precursors to the End of Days. Pointing out the fact that there has never been a time in history when we didn’t experience wars, disease, earthquakes and tornados doesn’t make much of an impression on them. I tried that once and was quickly put in my place with the ever popular and highly refined retort common to theists: “How do you know?”

I’m going to be increasing the rates at Eternal Earth-Bound Pets in a few weeks. I’m expecting a big surge in clients for post rapture pet rescue. With the May 21 rapture prediction and all these dead birds and fish adding fuel to the fundie fire, there’s money to be made, and they won’t need it where they're going. Just ask em.

NostradamHump’s Religiously Oriented Predictions for 2011

2011-01-01T13:30:00.015-05:00

As an atheist and a skeptic I don’t put any stock in fortune telling or prophesying the future. I’ll leave that to the weak of mind, gullible and religious. I am however gifted with the not so unique talent of predicting the acts of the religiously infected community whose behavior is as predictable as a Youth Minister’s arousal at a preteen church camping trip.

So, here are NostradamHump’s top ten religiously oriented predictions for the coming year. Remember, you heard it here first!:

Pat Robertson will make another inane connection between a natural disaster and God’s wrath. Within a week he’ll die of a massive stroke brought about by his being exposed as the illegitimate son of philosopher and atheist Bertrand Russell and direct descendant of Judas Iscariot.

The pope will make another insensitive and wholly (and holy) stupid remark about condoms, Muslims, and the acceptability of pedophilia. He’ll follow that up by issuing a Papal Writ that declares priestly erections a mortal sin ... thereby claiming he has resolved the child molestation problem among his shaman. In an unrelated edict, he also changes the Vatican’s age of consent from twelve to eight years old.

The Texas School Board will outlaw the teaching of Evolution. During the subsequent book burning of all science texts two board members will catch fire and burn to a crisp. The remaining members will declare it “Part of God’s plan.”

Fred Phelps of the Westboro Baptist Church will picket the funeral of a Medal of Honor recipient. Twenty openly gay active service combat veterans beat him to a pulp, cover him in BBQ sauce, and slow roast him over an open fire taking 2nd prize in the Kansas State Pig Roast BBQ Cook-Off.

Creationists and religious fanatics Ray "Banana Boy" Comfort and Kirk Cameron will be discovered in a motel room committing unspeakable acts with various fruits and vegetables. Claiming the pineapple Ray shoved up Kirk’s ass is a perfect fit, Ray declares it further proof of God’s existence. Kirk will be speechless, but evidently moved to tears of devotion will nod in agreement.

On April 6th, the day they commemorate the establishment of the Mormon Church, LDS President Thomas S. Monson will receive a revelation from God. Effective that day Mormon women will switch from wearing the traditional sacred but frumpy under garment to wearing the Sacred Thong of Moroni. He also declares Utah a slave state.

Labeling them an affront to Allah, Islam will issue a fatwa against Joe Frazier, Ken Norton, Leon Sphinx and Larry Holmes after learning that each had disrespected "Muhammed" by kicking his ass in a boxing match. In an unrelated incident, Islam declares jihad on ebay after a hummus coated pita with the image of Muhammed is offered for sale ... and no one buys it. In another inexplicable action, Islam will launch a jihad against all African Americans, when an imam in Georgia over hears a man at his favorite waffle house ask his waiter to "Get me some mo ham, Ed."
In March archeologists working a dig in Israel discover crucified remains in a bone box inscribed: “Jesus of Nazareth - Son of Joseph and Mary, Brother of James, Donkey Thief, Killer of Fig Trees, Trouble Maker, all around Smart Ass.” After carbon dating confirms authenticity, Easter is officially cancelled.

After five months of non-stop prayer, an Evangelical church in Mississippi will announce it has successfully regenerated an amputee’s limb. When investigating scientists explain that the amputee in question is a star fish and they can do that all by themselves, the faithful will insist it still counts.

With the uneventful passing of the May 21, 2011 Rapture prophesy, thousands of disappointed fundamentalist Christians converge on Evangelical charlatan Harold Camping’s radio station. In a last minute bid to save his reputation and life Camping will swear he said some Christians will have a “rupture” on May 21st … not “Rapture.” The crowd buys it, disburse peacefully, and head to Walmart creating a run on hernia trusses.

There you have it. I wouldn’t say you can bank on these predictions, but if Shakespeare was right, and “past is prologue,” I’d say these are better than even money bets.

Wishing all my friends and readers a happy, healthy and prosperous 2011.