Once a year I take a break from posting a religious themed article, and indulge my softer gentler side by listing secular things that really piss me off. Here now, in no particular order is:
HUMP’S ANNUAL TOP TEN LIST OF HIDEOUS ANNOYANCES
- Those little disclaimers under TV commercials that say “Do not attempt”. Like when you watch the Maytag repairman drive a monster truck over 20 lined up washing machines. Or you see a stunt woman jump off a twenty story building and crash through a glass sky light. As though anyone will go and buy 20 washing machines and drive a truck over them; or rush out and jump off a high-rise building. Any company who thinks we are that stupid doesn’t deserve our business.
- Barney Frank (D-MA)
- Chuck Schumer (D-NY)
- Nancy Pelosi (D- Botox test dummy)
- The Comcast computer generated animated commercial with the obnoxious monotone sing song theme music that goes on for what feels like an eternity (a full minute to be exact). I am now stalking all Comcast vans with a battery powered nail gun.
- Paul Schaffer. The bald headed pseudo-cool, shades wearing, sycophantic douche bag from the David Letterman show makes me want to randomly kill bald men.
- People who say “The proof is in the pudding”; and “Music has charms to soothe the savage beast.” Oy!! The correct phraseology is “The proof of the pudding is in the tasting.”; and “… to soothe the savage breast.” For Christ sakes, if you’re going to use an old saw, at least use it correctly!
- Old people who dawdle at or below the speed limit on a two lane 30 mph highway, while riding the brake every nine seconds, in a five mile long no passing zone, never thinking to pull over to let pass the twelve cars tailgating behind, all of whom are late for their doctor’s appointment.
- That Volks Wagon commercial with the German accented talking VW bug who sounds like a caricature of Sgt. Shultz from the old Hogan’s Heroes show. Yeah, great ... makes me wanna go right out and buy a car from a Nazi war criminal. Idiots.
- The “Octo-Mom”. For god’s sake woman, a vagina is not a clown car!!!
Ok… break’s over. Everyone please get back to stamping out religion now.
Thanks.
Hump
6 comments:
Could I add the Rush Limbaugh's followers to the list? Rush is a flaming Nazi blimp, but giving the devil his due, he's figured out how to make a fortune out of being a douche bag. His followers, however, baaaaaa baaaaaa...
Oreo
Tracey,
heheh...so noted.
Where does Sean Hannity rank or that odd-shaped character Glenn Beck?
I'd rank GOP minority whip, Eric Cantor in the top 20 as well as Kentucky's living gift to Madame Tussaud's Wax Museum, Mitch McConnell.
Everyone of those names would qualify.
I guess the fact that I don't listen to rush or sean, and beck and canter aren't as visible as the "octo Mom" or Barney Frank, sort of takes them off my radar screen.
Maybe next year ;)
It's funny your post is so dedicated to anti religious topics. You do know that in the last century is what atheistic and darwinian philosophy that killed more people than all previous centuries combined. A good book for you to read would be the "Black Book of Communism."
Funny, eh? I don't see you laughing.
I see someone who is in denial, and under delusion.
The hackneyed old saw about atheism and darwinian theory falls flat on its face. Theists have tied to use that for years as a countrpoint to the thousands of hyears of murder, genocide, and torture committed by "the faithful".
That theists point to comminusm as beoing evidence of atheistic immorality is simpy due to the self imposed ignorance of what communism is; but I won't dane to educate the uneduatable.
Yeah, darwin's theory is repoosnible for deaths like the theory of gravity is responsible for death. If youaccept the theory of gravity and jump off a building it will killyou; just like handling snakes for jesus will kill you. Short of that, anyone who believes in eveloutionary theory isn't prone to kill himself, or anyone, just because we evolved from lower life forms.
I know..thats all very confusing to you, since it doesn't fit in with your preferred distortion of reality. But hey... that's the mental impairment of yours, and people like you in action.
Next time you post, please have something intellgent to say...preferably with supporting documentaion from a non religious apologetics site..oh, and use a real name. Jesus hates cowards, so do I.
Hump
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