Tuesday, December 25, 2012

Some Holiday and New Years Wishes from the Camel

Whether you are observing Sol Invictus; the birth of the gods Tammuz or Mithras; Saturnalia; the winter solstice; Yule tree worship; a purely secular Xmas, or (dog forbid) a tradition Xmas, I trust all of my readers are having an enjoyable time with friends and family. Nothing brings us together, or says remembrance of mythical man-god made up birthdates or the celebration of natural cosmological events, like December 25.

As we approach the end of 2012 I have a few wishes for the New Year:

- Health, happiness and prosperity for us all.

- A healthy and happy new baby for my eldest and his wife next April, my first grandchild.

- A wonderful new life together for my youngest son and his new bride.

- An accelerated withdrawal from Afghanistan.

- Another year of erosion of religion here and abroad

- A year with fewer declarations of divinely inspired and supported hatred and inane madness from religious shaman and their mindless followers

- Less child abuse cases, murders and destruction in the name of their nonexistent god.

- More exposure and prosecutions of clergy and church hierarchy misdeeds.

- More legal victories by the Freedom from Religion Foundation, Americans United for the Separation of Church and State and other Freethinker orgs against religionists who spit on the Constitution and equate godliness to patriotism.

- More activism and visibility by secularists around the nation and the world to inspire closeted freethinkers to come out and speak up.

- The televised celebrations of Fred Phelps, Billy Graham, Pat Robertson, and Terry Jones funerals narrated by Ricky Gervais, with the tune “Don’t Let the Door to the Outhouse Hit You in the Ass on the Way Out.” playing in the back ground.

- A pair of baby camels delivered to the Camel Ranch, free of charge - freight prepaid - one male one female.

That’s it. I’m easily satisfied. I don’t ask for much.
Have a happy New Years , be safe, and keep practicing Faithicide.

Monday, December 17, 2012

A few words on the Newtown, Connecticut horror

Like you and the rest of the nation I am distraught beyond words at the massacre in Connecticut. The horror, the very scope of destruction, is almost more than I can wrap my head around. I find a tear coming to my eye with every story about the victims and the many expressions of sympathy from around the world. I'm in mourning for those children and their teachers.

But now the media coverage has become obsessive, almost circus like in it's repetition and desperate grasps at new angles and obscure interviews. It is verging on becoming a morbid dance of death. We've heard everything we need to hear, and I wish it would stop.

Perhaps you, like me, are disgusted with the grotesque references to prayer, god, heaven, angels, jesus and all the predictable platitudes that the religious drag out whenever a tragedy happens. Religious bloggers and their sheeple who hallelujah their exhortation to prayer (for what I wonder); the crazed pastors and televangelists with their insipid and sickening declarations of why this happened, ranging from the ever popular "God called them home," to it being attributed to god's vengeance for his "not being allowed in school"; and the simply religiously infected need to espouse their religious beliefs publicly and wallow in a kind of breast beating and self flagellation... it all disgusts me.

It is the religious' trained response to inexplicable, and unfathomable acts of natural destruction and insanely driven acts of "evil." It's what they do in reaction to their impotence to do anything meaningful. It's what they've been indoctrinated or paid, to do. I despise the religious all the more for it.

But, I won't judge the parents and families of those victims the same way. They have entered a real hell, the hell no parent should ever experience. Let them express their grief and relieve their pain anyway they can...they will, sadly, have a life time of it. If their exhorting a god to explain, or imploring it to give it meaning, or praising it for taking their child to an imagined Candyland (instead of interceding on the child's behalf and averting the horror in the first place) is what they need to do to assuage their grief, then so be it.

Let them find what comfort where they can. I hope they find some measure of it, for there - but for the finger of fate - go us all.

Tuesday, December 11, 2012

Onward Atheist Soldiers: Let’s fight to preserve Christmas

I’m told by conservative news outlets that it tis the season for me to become engaged in a war. Seems that we, the godless heathen masses that makeup 8% to 15% of this nation’s populous, are once again rallying our massive collective power and influence in an effort to eliminate one of the most important holidays that the 76% majority hold so dear. Who knew?

Actually, they have it all wrong. The holiday shopping season is a veritable “God send” to our economy. It is expected to generate $590 billion in retail sales, a 6% increase over last year. Approximately 600,000 temporary jobs are created to service this sales volume; jobs that will help people pay their rent, buy gifts for their loved ones, and like wise stimulate the economy. Never mind the billions spent on Xmas trees, postage for holiday greeting cards, UPS/Fed Ex delivery costs and holiday food. As a capitalist I love Christmas. "The chief business of the American people is business," as Calvin Coolidge said. The last thing I’d want to see is the disappearance of Christmas. One has to wonder how much stronger China’s GDP would be if their 1.3 billion population were 76% Xtian instead of the roughly 7-10% it is now. I’m glad it isn’t.

I’d defend to the death Frosty the Snowman’s right to melt; Charlie Brown’s annual disappointing trip to the Xmas tree lot; George Bailey’s suicidal trip to that snow covered bridge; the Grinch’s efforts to mess with the heads of the denizens of Whoville; and Natalie Wood’s right to doubt Santa. These TV shows generate millions more in advertising that add to the nation’s financial stability and growth. After all, that’s what Xmas is all about… well, that and sharing fun, food and a warm fireplace on a snowy night with your family.

War on Xmas? Nope…I love Xmas. All people who want to see a strong economy should love Xmas. I fully endorse every man, woman, child and family pet being designated as each families personal diety upon whom gifts are heaped. If there were an organized effort to eliminate Xmas I’d strap on my body armor, lock and load my AR, man the barricades and willingly shoot the first ” Kill Kristmas” banner waving anarchist, anti-capitalist, agrarian society proposing low life that ventures into my crosshairs.

There is, however, a more covert and insidious movement a foot to kill Christmas. It comes from extremists who think Rudolph and Santa aren’t the true harbingers of Xmas – declaring them a perversion of the season; who deride the national spending frenzy as antithetical to the meaning of Christmas.

These are fanatics who believe that men dressed in golden finery, waving smoke pots, chanting mumbo-jumbo and staring into the plaster eyes of the bloody effigy of a corpse is what is important. Or that erecting make-believe scenes involving plastic non-existent wise men, virgins, camels and baby man-gods on public property is what’s really important. Organizations that use this time of year to ring bells and beg for money to do good works, which they also use promote delusion and oppose equal rights for everyone. These are the real warriors against Christmas. Fortunately those minions of cultist delusion are a small minority and growing smaller all the time. Eventually they will simply fade into obscurity taking their absurd interpretation of the holiday with them.

Warrior against Xmas? Not here. On Xmas Eve I plan to hang my dead Jewish man-god piƱata from the rafters, hand out bats, and let the good times roll.

Tuesday, December 4, 2012

What’s behind this fascination with Jesus’ erection?

Back in the 50’s the Knights Of Columbus (a fraternal organization of  Catholic nutters who wear funny hats and carry ceremonial swords) erected a statue of Jesus on federal property in Montana. Painted in flesh tones, with a blue robe, the life size idol stands adjacent to a ski trail on a national park.  It is an obvious and blatant violation of the 1st amendment, as its presence on federal land is tantamount to the government’s endorsement of a specific religion. Christianity. Its continued existence is being challenged by the Freedom from Religion Foundation. Today the courts agreed the suit can go forward.

As usual the religious are up in arms at the godless’ attempt to have Jesus displaced.  Oh, they know it’s blatant a violation of the constitution, or at least their legal council knows it, but that doesn't matter to them. Evidently after fifty years they figure Jesus is beyond some imagined statute of limitations.  Their argument makes as much sense as finding out a hypothetical county in Alabama forbids blacks from voting, but defending continuation of said violation because it’s been that way since reconstruction.

Similar violations of religious statues and symbols on public lands have been the subject of ongoing challenges. In some cases they've been removed, or encapsulated with plywood pending court decisions.  In others the public land where the icon stands has  been sold to sectarian organizations to circumvent the law.  The battle goes on.

What’s behind this Xtian fixation with erecting graven images and execution devises on land your and my tax dollars paid for and support? Does their scripture demand idol worship on public property? Has Jesus now declared that what is Caesar’s should be encroached upon and possessed by Jesus, in direct contrast to his admonishment to keep Caesar’s and God’s property / tribute separate [Mark 12:17] ? Is the faith of Christians so weak they need to have public reminders that they are superstitious throwbacks? Is their private property or church holdings so sparse that they are insufficient to contain their grotesque religious renderings of death devises and Jewish zombies?  Doubtful.

What it comes down to is promoting the faith and using the government as co-conspirators in their proselytizing scheme.  No innocent trespass of the law, this is a full fledged frontal attack on separation of church and state, and clear intent to promote their religion as the preferred belief. 

They’ll deny this, of course. But it doesn’t take Nostradamus to predict their response if adjacent to their statues the government was pressured to provide equal recognition for all other beliefs.  In fact, that may be the best tact the FFRF could take.  For every Christian symbol on public property demand equal space for the Pastafarian’s noodley god, The Flying Spaghetti Monster, complete with meatball eyes and bright red marinara sauce.  Insist that a Wicca goddess, a Satanist effigy of Satan, a Muslim crescent, and a full color life size rendering of Ganesh, the four armed elephant god of the Hindus in all his colorfully hued skin tones, keep Jesus company.

One of two things would have to happen. Either the government would be forced to remove all the offending Xtian symbols thus resolving this issue once and for all; or they would be forced to provide equal space and prominence to these competing religious symbols to avoid the endorsement of one religion.

Frankly, I wouldn't care which one it lead to. Either would satisfy me as long as the erections of Jesus and Satan were the same size.