Sunday, June 23, 2013

Doing death defying stunts for God. Oh ... and the money of course.

Tonight Nik Wallenda will take his high wire walk across the Grand Canyon. Nik has a lot of balls.  He also is a Christian.  He credits god with his skill, credits god for his successfully performing other death defying stunts.  He thanks god for his success every time. To quote Nik from a recent Huff Post story:   "Everything we did was for the glory of God."

Really?  Hmmm... seeing as how the family business has supported some three generations of Wallendas, one might think they did it for their livelihood. After all, they don't do these things for free. Nik is going to have a major pay day tonight.

But OK, for the "glory of god"...  fine.  Too bad his preferred god doesn't seem to return the favor to the Wallendas, what with three of the family dying in falls and one permanently paralyzed.  I imagine the religionists such as Nik will say that was god's way of testing their faith. Or without god more of them would have died or been paralyzed for life.  What a god.

On the other hand Nik is pragmatic. In a Christianity today story, he said: "There's a lot of people that have amazing relationships with Christ that lose their lives in a car accident. Does that mean they didn't have a good enough relationship with Jesus? No. Life happens and God created us all in his image, but we're all our own people. We're not robots. We make decisions."

Now there's a dilemma. He thanks god for his surviving these stunts, but admits Jebus doesn't always come through in a pinch.  Sounds almost like he's saying: "I believe in God, and that he'll protect me, but hey...shit happens."  Might as well put a rabbit's foot and four leaf clover in his back pocket for that matter. At least a big furry foot could help break the fall.

I hope he makes it across safely tonight.  If he does it will be because of his very unique skill, understanding of physics and wind currents, and decades of practice, not because some imaginary boogie man who killed his family members as "part of a plan" decided he didn't want Nik to perform for him and his angel fans in heaven. Nevertheless, he'll do what the religiously afflicted always do... credit his boogieman with his success  because he is just a worthless sinner. 

On the other hand, if he doesn't make it I doubt his family will blame god.  Indeed, their god will get the credit for his death being "part of a greater plan."  The platitudes of god having called Nik home to that eternal circus in the sky will be proffered for all believers to to tear up over and nod in delusional approval. It's always a win-win for their imaginary god being.  And on it goes...foolishness fed by ancient nonsense.

Break a leg, Nik


paul said...

If god's on his side, why does he need a balancing pole?

Dromedary Hump said...

My guess is because he is only willing to be a religious asshat to a certain degree.
Then science takes over. ;)

LuWeeks said...

Could it be that the pole and the wire make a cross.

I also wonder why they practice balance, why not just pray more.

Carl said...

I have read about people that do this and other risk taking stunts they tend have low dopamine but I suspect other parts of the brain are also not wired right. Which also could explain the religious mania.

Texas Mike said...

I loved how every time Nik asked god to calm the winds they would gust higher and higher. I bet the idiot was thinking "I must have screwed up somewhere, cuz god's really f'n with me!"

Anonymous said...

To follow up on Paul's comment;
with Jesus on his side, why does he need the wire?

Dromedary Hump said...

Too showy to walk on would one up his Lard and Slaver, who only walked on water.

Anonymous said...

Well, sorta. HE is, after all, floating around up there somewhere after HIS ascension. Perhaps they could skip across the canyon hand in hand and HE could let go near the end and as Wallenda plummets toward death, HE could swoop down like Superman and save him.